The Way of Metamorphosis XVM ~~ This eBook is freely offered. It may not be sold or be printed for sale without the author’s prior written consent. For the latest edition, visit www.theWayofM.com Copyright © 2025 by Xavier Victor Montague. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without writ- ten permission, except in the case of brief quotations. FIRST EDITION Cover design by Dkosig and Jeremy Taylor The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ The apotheosis of TIME waited for him. The boy had no idea how quickly life would pass him by. He never expected his life to turn out differently than how he imagined. But then again, who does? No one told him that the secret to happiness wasn’t a secret after all; instead, he was told that a successful life would be a happy life. He was too young to understand that time itself could be sadistic, as if to punish busy people. He didn't know adults could lose themselves pursuing the future or escaping heartache. As the boy grew, his unhappiness grew in tandem with his loneliness. When depression and anxiety swallowed him, he believed something was wrong with him. And whenever he felt overwhelmed, he feared spinning out of control. To overcome his despair and brokenness, he tried to make sense of the world by sculpting a set of beliefs for himself—beliefs that offered comfort, hope, and certainty. Yet, with each passing year, the absurdities of life made him cynical. Rejection shattered his heart. Disappointment dulled his passions. Injustice darkened his soul. And the pains of the past tethered him until one day he would unearth something mysterious buried deep in his soul—something all humans are born with. Sadly, it wasn't until he reached old age that he would discover what kept him so busy, what drained him, and what prevented him from experiencing greater joy, love, and peace. And so, the story begins as all stories do . . The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 1 Once upon a time, a boy named Chronos lived in a region of France called Brittany with his parents. They resided in a small house near the ancient forest of Brocéliande. One morning, before the sun peeked over the horizon, the forest awakened the boy with its spring aroma. As if in a trance, he quickly dressed. Noticing his parents were still in a timeless sleep, he quietly opened his bed- side window to sneak away. In the half-light, in the calm before dawn, the boy made his way to the for- est. Upon reaching what was known as the Entrance Archway, a damp chill seeped into his soul; he had never ventured here before. Elders from his village had forbidden anyone from entering the forest of Brocéliande. When he asked why, he was only told that the Druids had created the Archway and that their spirits still roamed the forest. The boy knew little about the Druids, except that they had lived in Brittany long before the Romans arrived under Julius Caesar. Two towering oak trees stood like gatekeepers on either side of the massive stone archway. Straining his neck to look up, he noticed mysterious engravings, most of which were obscured by vines. The symbols unsettled him, except for one that resembled a flute player. He smiled as he reached out to touch it, recalling his beloved grandmother, who played the flute to soothe him to sleep. Since her passing, he could not bear to listen to the sound of a flute. After this fond memory faded, his fear returned, stronger than his curiosity. Slowly, he backed away from the archway, wishing to be back in his warm bed. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 2 Focusing on what lay beyond the archway, he began to walk backward until something startled him. A cold sensation pressed against his back. With trepidation, he turned around to discover a menhir, a prehistoric meg- alith, which also bore mysterious engravings. Relieved, he closed his eyes. When he opened them, the vines from the archway seemed to be reaching for him. In his imagination, they dragged him back. And before he knew it, he had crossed over into the forest of Brocéliande. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 3 Heturned to run home but couldn’t. A thick fog had appeared on the other side of the archway. He stood in disbelief, still hoping this was all a dream. When he looked up at the back of the archway, he noticed two inscriptions engraved on either side of the apex, written in a foreign script. Between them was a symbol he recognized: FELIX QUI PACIFICUS IN SILENTIO FORTITUDO A massive stone slab at the bottom stretched across the archway, also en- graved with an inscription but in French: NE REGARDE PAS DERRIÈRE TOI “Why,” he whispered, “would someone engrave ‘do not look back’ at the entrance to a forest?” Looking ahead, he noticed the sun illuminating a path, sparking his curios- ity and easing his fear. Guided like a sail by the wind, he felt compelled to ex- plore the forest. Soon, he became enchanted by the beauty surrounding him. The lush greenery was inviting, and the dappling sunlight through the tow- ering trees created an air of mystery. The gentle rustling of the wind through the leaves soothed his spirit. While enjoying the rhythmic chorus of chirping birds, he imagined they were singing just for him, making him want to skip. He then paused when he heard the gentle trickle of a nearby stream. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 4 Unbeknownst to him, the forest was luring him deeper and deeper into its labyrinthine interior. Soon he would discover a new world with a different way of living. But first, he would have to learn a difficult lesson that most humans grasp only near the end of their lives—a lesson that could spare them much future heartache. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 5 Despite enjoying his time in the forest, the boy felt lonely, which re- minded him of how he felt at home. His parents were often too busy to spend meaningful time with him. “Instead of playing with me,” he would tell himself, “they send me to my grandparents or buy me things.” This made him think of his favorite teacher, Mrs. Macron Magtoll. Only now did he understand why he liked staying after school to help clean up; she made him feel useful and less alone. Though he lacked the maturity to articulate it, he intuitively grasped that if you value someone, you will find time to be with them. The forest sensed the boy's sadness and called on the wind to awaken the sky trees, which swayed in unison as if the wind played a melody. As he watched the rhythm of the trees, he soon forgot his sadness—until he spotted a lifeless squirrel on the ground. This reminded him of walking with his friends one day and finding a bird on the ground with a broken wing. While they watched it struggle, an old man wandered up behind them. They hadn’t noticed him until he spoke. “Some look at a dying bird,” he said, “and see only unanswered pain, be- lieving death has the final word. Others look at that same bird and feel its glory, sensing something smiling through it.” After speaking, the old man silently continued on his way. The boy recalled how his friends had been irritated by the old man, but he experienced something different—something profound. It reminded him of ly- ing on his back while gazing at the stars. Somehow, he knew it was unnecessary to have complete understanding to appreciate the mystery of beauty. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 6 As the boy continued to meander along the path, he soon realized how dif- ferent the forest of Brocéliande was from the one on the other side of his village. Many of the trees straddled large rocks as if to comfort them. He found it strange that the trees didn’t take root in the earth but sprawled like octopus legs covering the forest floor. “How do these trees stay strong?” he wondered. Unbeknownst to him, the forest was teaching him about growing into adulthood. He would soon understand that when a tree grows over a rock and its roots spread like tentacles, it symbolizes the genesis of wisdom. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   7 Withoutwords to express it, the boy wondered how the forest could be so vibrant amid all the reminders of death. In decay, there was life. Fallen trees, with their softened trunks, were draped in moss, filling the air with an earthy aroma. The boy was amazed by the bright orange and red mushrooms sprouting from the skeletons of trees, as if someone had planted them. “How can life grow from death?” he wondered. Standing motionless, he felt as if he could hear the heartbeat of the forest. This brought him comfort until he remembered the vines on the archway grab- bing him. His fear made him believe the forest could swallow him. This made him want to return home, but then he heard something unex- pected—the sound of a flute. He quickly dismissed it as the wind. Spotting a large flat rock across the pathway, he walked over and sat down, exhausted from exploring. Resting his elbow on one knee, he picked up a stick to play with until the melody returned. This time, he knew it wasn't the wind. It resembled a tune his grandmother used to play. Suddenly, the forest darkened as if a storm were approaching. An eerie si- lence enveloped him like fog, and his heart began to pound. He wanted to run, but when he heard a noise behind him, fear held him down. Just then, an acorn fell on his head. Startled, the boy jumped up like a frightened cat. Looking down the path, he saw an old man approaching. At first, he felt scared until he noticed the stranger carrying a wooden flute. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 8 Whenthe old man arrived, the boy asked what he was doing. “The same as you!” the old man declared, a twinkle in his eye. The boy thought, “Old men don’t explore!” To his surprise, the old man smiled and replied, “Why not?” “I don’t know.” For some reason, the boy felt an affinity for the old man. His gentle de- meanor reminded him of his grandmother, who had passed away a few years earlier. “What’s your name, son?” the old man asked. “Chronos.” “Hmm,” the man mused. “You are named after the Greek god of time, the father of Zeus. Did you know that words like ‘chronology’ and ‘chronicle’ come from the word ‘chronos’?” “No!” the boy exclaimed. “No one told me I was named after a Greek god!” The old man grinned and nodded. He hesitated to share that in Greek mythology, the Titan god Chronos cas- trates his father and devours his own children—a grotesque image illustrating how time consumes everything in its path. Quietly, the old man moved behind him and placed his hand on the boy’s left shoulder. He whispered, “You are going to tell me about one of life’s great mysteries, but first, I have two questions for you.” At that moment, the sun broke through the clouds. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   9 This reminded the boy of something his grandmother once said: “It is writ- ten that when you walk in your own light, you walk in beauty, for light reveals all that is hidden in your heart. Only then will you see without a veil and find peace.” For the first time, Chronos wondered how it was possible to hide anything from one’s own heart. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 10 Theold man listened to the boy’s thoughts. “One day,” he began, “I was walking along the outside border of the forest of Brocéliande when I came across an elderly woman who had collapsed on the path.” “Who was it?” the boy asked. “Your grandmother. I was the last person she spoke to before she died.” The boy was shocked. “You found her?” “Yes. Her heart had given out.” “She loved her walks,” the boy said. “She told me that being in nature cre- ated space in her mind. I never understood what she meant. What happened after you found her?” “I knelt beside her and gently cradled her head. She knew she was dying. We were too far away to get help, so we just talked.” “About what?” “Our conversation was filled with nostalgia. At one point, I asked her what her long life had taught her.” The boy's eyes widened. “With a knowing glint in her eye, she whispered, ‘I have noticed that some people live to dream while others dream to live. In their dreaming, they get lost in time. And then, before they know it, their life has passed them by.’” “After she spoke, I asked why she thought this happened.” “What did she say?” the boy asked eagerly. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 11 “At that point, she was fading. Her eyes were closed as she took her last breath.” The boy gasped. “But as she did so, she said this in a faint voice: ‘Time passes quickly because people forget to love.’” “I’m not sure I understand,” the boy said softly. With a wink, the old man reassured him that he would soon enough. “Your grandmother was a good person, Chronos. From our brief conversa- tion, I could tell she was someone who freely gave her time, who listened with empathy, and for that, she was loved. She lived her life with nothing to prove.” “I miss her so much,” the boy said, his eyes welling with tears. The old man hugged the boy tightly. Sometimes, grief requires no words— only presence. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 12 When the old man sensed the boy’s grief beginning to fade, he stepped back to meet his gaze. “Would you like to hear the first question?” The boy nodded. “What do grown-ups do most with their time?” The boy watched as the old man resumed walking. “What a strange question,” he thought. Yet the answer seemed obvious to him. He dashed up to share his insight with the old man. “They chase it,” he said confidently. This brought a smile to the old man’s face. “Fascinating!” he exclaimed, wondering how someone so young could have noticed this. “Tell me why you say that?” “My parents are always busy. I hear them say they never have enough time.” With a trace of sadness in his voice, the old man posed his second question. “What do all grown-ups want?” He knew the boy could not answer this question, but he asked anyway, hoping to plant a seed of wisdom in his mind. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 13 Theboy thought this too was easy. He stepped in front of the old man to face him. “I know the answer,” he declared. The old man’s bushy eyebrows lifted in surprise. “Tell me,” he urged. “They don’t know what they really need and this is why they never have enough time.” The old man was stunned. “The forest must be speaking to the boy’s intui- tion,” he thought. “What makes you believe that?” he asked. “Because whenever my parents get what they want, they soon desire some- thing else. They never seem satisfied.” The old man chuckled in disbelief. “What’s so funny?” the boy asked. “It never surprises me how people can see the flaws in others while remain- ing blind to their own.” “I don’t understand.” “You told me that adults, like your parents, are rarely content, and when they are, it doesn’t last long. Have you considered that you might be the same? When you get a new toy, you soon grow tired of it or feel unhappy when you see what other children have.” This comment made the boy doubt his newfound wisdom, even though he had answered correctly. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   14 “If you seek happiness,” the old man said, “you must first know where it ends; otherwise, your search will be endless.” Chronos had no idea what that meant. Noticing the disappointment in the boy’s eyes, the old man decided to share a story. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 15 “Once was a man who spent his entire life searching for happiness. One day, he found himself lost deep in the forest. As he sat against a tree, feeling alone, scared, and soaked with sadness, the animals drew near. ‘We do not like seeing you sad,’ they said. ‘Ask us anything you wish, and you shall have it.’ The man thought for a moment and said, ‘I want to have good sight.’ The eagle replied, ‘You shall have mine.’ Then the man proclaimed, ‘I want to be strong.’ The bear promised, ‘I will give you my strength.’ ‘I long to know the secrets of life,’ the man continued. The serpent said, ‘I will show them to you.’ And so it went with all the animals. Finally, the man felt he had received everything he desired. He thanked the animals and left. The forest fell silent until the owl spoke up. ‘Now that the man has everything he wants, he believes his sadness has lifted and feels he can do great things, but I am worried.’ ‘Why do you say this?’ asked the deer. ‘The man has all his desires fulfilled. His sadness will be no more.’ ‘No,’ the owl replied. ‘It won’t. I see a hole in the man, as deep as a hunger that will never be filled. It is what makes him sad. It is what makes him want. It is what drives his yearning.’ ‘Oh!’ exclaimed the bear, regretting he offered his strength. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 16 ‘What he wants,’ the owl explained, ‘is not what he needs, and what he needs he does not know. This is the root of his suffering—it fuels his endless wanting and taking. But one day, Mother Earth will say, 'I am no more. I have nothing left to give.' ‘What can be done?’ asked the eagle. ‘Nothing,’ the owl answered. ‘Unless the man finds the courage to delve into the depths of his soul. Only then will he uncover the source of his cravings.’ ‘How?’ asked the deer. ‘Because silence will speak to him.’ When the bear heard this, he said to the owl, ‘If what you say is true, this will never happen. Humans are not yet humble enough to listen.’ As the boy pondered this, unsure of how humility related to the story, the old man quietly slipped away among the trees whence he came. In the wind, he faintly heard the old man’s voice one last time: “Go and find out the real reason grown-ups are always busy. Only then will you understand why life passes quickly.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   17 Timeskipped along like a pebble tossed across a pond, leaving echoes of empty ripples that never return. In youth, we believe we have all the time in the world. We think our lives will be better than our parents'. We are determined not to repeat their mistakes and are convinced we won't be dissatisfied like them. Instead, we are certain we will find true love, fulfill our dreams, be happier, and escape the loneliness reflected in the eyes of so many adults we know. But then one day we wake up in nostalgic wonder, asking, “Where did the time go?” This unsettling question feels like finishing a book only to realize there had been no plot or theme. Time is a strange thing when days bleed out into weeks and months collapse under their own weight. And so it was with Chronos. The boy became . . . an old man—without a plot—desperately searching for a theme, hoping to stitch everything together. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 18 For Chronos, each passing year felt like a chapter in a book, except there was no cohesive narrative. He continued to search for a deeper meaning, but it was like trying to grasp the texture of a fleeting dream. He had yet to recognize the timeless wisdom from the world’s literature: Achievements are anticlimactic . . . without love. Relationships complete life, making everything worthwhile. Chronos desperately sought an overarching story. He wished to feel whole. He wanted to be desired. He longed for a climax. But then it hit him: his life had been a series of musical notes without rhyme or reason. This realization left Chronos with one pressing question: “How can I rec- oncile my life before the last page is written?” This question haunted him. Like everyone else, he wanted a life well lived . . . but also . . . a life well ended. Chronos had no idea his life was on the brink of an irreversible shift—a transformation that would fundamentally change the meaning of life. A transformation that would rekindle his longing for joy, peace, and love. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   19 Despite his encounter with the old man in the forest of Brocéliande, Chronos still wondered how his life had passed so quickly. At midlife, he recalled saying how the years seemed to fly by unnoticed, as if decades had been grafted together. His young adult life began with promise, filled with hopes and dreams, but then something nebulous happened along the way. Whatever it was, he now believed he had wasted much of his life. He frequently asked himself, “When did I lose my way?” And now, in his autumn years, Chronos had no dreams left. This made him believe his life would not end well, causing him to experi- ence the acute horror of what he termed the "eclipse of time"—when the future was no longer defined by hope. During these times, everything felt dim. He sensed the world closing in on him. Life now resembled a flickering candle about to be snuffed out. Sometimes this induced panic; at other times, he feared his despair would spill over into another depression. Recently, he had been plagued by the same restless sleep as the night before. He could not enjoy the summer sounds of chirping crickets outside his bedroom window or appreciate life's beauty. This left him feeling irritable. One humid night under a full moon, he dragged himself out of bed and shuffled to the bathroom. Typically, he avoided looking at his reflection in the mirror, not wanting to be reminded of how time had engraved his face. But on this night, he forgot. When he caught sight of his reflection, he paused. “My God, where did the years go?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 20 SinceChronos was now of the age of forgotten dreams, he began to reflect on death in ways he had never done before. He felt it coming for him, wickedly smiling as it drew near. “Is this all that life amounts to?” he often wondered. Sometimes he thought dementia would be a welcome gift. “At least,” he mused, “it would allow me to forget the pains of nostalgia and my impending extinction.” In his youth, he had never contemplated his own mortality. He believed he would never grow old and wrinkled. But now, time was running out. The long shadow of life was shrinking. “How is it,” he pondered, “that some people meet death with such calm- ness?” In moments like these, Chronos recalled the old man in the forest of Brocé- liande. He considered how his life might have turned out differently had he made wiser choices. What troubled him now was not his past mistakes but the two questions the old man had posed to him. He was upset with himself for not reflecting on them more deeply. The questions now felt like an anchor pulling him down, leaving him with no hope of salvation. It never occurred to him to cut the anchor rope. What also bothered him was that, despite answering the two questions cor- rectly, Chronos had never imagined they would apply to him. As he grew older, the questions resonated with increasing intensity: What do all grown-ups do most with their time? And what do all grown-ups want? In hindsight, he recognized that the answers he had given that day had only sat on the surface of his tongue. He’d never truly digested them. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 21 Now he understood that if he had kept those answers close to his heart, he might not feel so defeated. To console himself, Chronos told himself he was too young to have known the difference between knowledge and wisdom or to understand the meaning of prudence. Soon, he would learn the real reason. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 22 Onecool spring day, Chronos took a walk in a park, hoping to shake off his melancholic slumber. He wasn't surprised to feel this way; every spring, before the tulips blossomed, his spirit needed time to thaw after a long, cold winter of hibernation. But this time, he felt more somber than usual. One thought lingered in his mind: “Is life merely a series of moments stitched together by memories? What if all the stitches unravel?” he pondered, feeling as if spring would never arrive. In the past, such feelings of emptiness would have worried him, especially knowing despair was on the horizon. Now, he knew better. It was unwise to spend too much time fighting this feeling. He likened it to being swept out to sea, desperately trying to swim back, only to drown from exhaustion. Chronos knew his melancholy would naturally subside like the tide, and at the right time, he would find his shore again. While he continued his walk, he spotted a bench next to a woman feeding ducks. She didn’t acknowledge him and seemed transfixed by the beauty of a Kanzan cherry tree in full bloom. Chronos guessed she was around his age, but unlike him, she didn’t appear worn down by life. A gentle breeze carried the sweet floral scent of the Kanzan cherry tree to him, lifting his spirits. This made him wonder if people would still appreciate its beauty if they did not know it only bloomed for two weeks. After a while, he forgot the woman was there until she turned to him and asked, “What do you want out of life?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 23 Still captivated by the beauty of the tree, Chronos didn’t question why a stranger would ask such a random question. Instead, he stuttered, “I just want to be happy.” “So you’re not happy right now?” Her question annoyed him. “I wouldn’t feel this way if I were.” “Were you born unhappy?” The question caught him off guard. He didn’t know how to respond, so he simply shook his head. “Tell me then,” she asked, “what is happiness to you?” Chronos stared at her blankly. No one had ever asked him this before. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 24 Whenthe stranger sensed his hesitation, she rephrased her question: “Why do you want to be happy?” This simple question paralyzed Chronos. He thought he understood what happiness meant, but in that moment, the word crumbled into dust. With a stammer, he replied, “I don’t know. I never thought about it before. I just . . .” “Assumed?” the stranger suggested. “Yes. But isn’t happiness what everyone wants?” “You tell me.” Chronos looked down. The question made his head spin, echoing in his mind—Why do I want to be happy? Disappointed in himself, he realized he could not answer the question. “Would you agree that love is an emotion?” the stranger asked. “I suppose so. Although it seems to be more than just an emotion.” “Would you say happiness is an emotion?” “I think so, but it must be more than just an emotion.” “Happiness and love are intertwined. Anyone who experiences love—and, more importantly, expresses love—knows happiness. Those who lack love would never claim to be happy unless happiness is merely an emotion.” Chronos had to think about this. It sounded like a riddle. Looking back over his life, he recalled moments of laughter, joy, and fulfill- ment. Yet, deep down, he always felt a sense of discontent, as if disconnected. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 25 Chronos breathed heavily. “I’ve spent my whole life,” he said, “striving for something I don't know how to define.” “It may surprise you to hear this, but that is not a bad place to be!” the stranger replied compassionately. “I’m not so sure,” Chronos said. “In my twenties and thirties, I experi- mented with opium to induce euphoria, even though I knew it was just a feeling created by a substance. But it wasn’t enough. Now, when I take opium, I do it for a different reason.” “You do? Why?” “To forget . . . to forget the pain of the past and ease my regrets.” The stranger leaned in and whispered, “Enough is never enough when hap- piness is the fulcrum upon which you expect your life to rest.” Chronos felt dizzy as he lifted his head to look at her, not understanding what she meant. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 26 Thewoman stood up, saying, “Life can be whatever you want it to be, but it will never be what you think it needs to be if your identity and self-worth rely on external measures, including success.” Her comment reminded Chronos of his youth and his eagerness to experi- ence the freedom of adulthood. But no one warned him that when the vortex of life swallows you, there is no going back. One day, you realize that life is more complicated than you ever imagined. Her words reminded him of something he had recently written in his jour- nal: “I have been consumed by time, haunted by memories of regret. I think I used hope as a means to an end—hoping to be happy, hoping to be successful.” But now, at his age, what Chronos sought was peace. After she left, Chronos wondered if he had become like his parents. This thought troubled him deeply. As a young adult, he had vowed never to be like them. It wasn’t that his parents were bad people; they were simply preoccupied— always busy and never truly satisfied. When he came upon a willow tree, he sat against its trunk and reflected on the stranger’s words. “Is it true? Did I confuse happiness with success? Or was it the other way around?” Such thoughts left Chronos feeling exhausted and dazed. He didn’t want to think anymore, but in his disoriented state, an unusual question emerged: How is happiness made? The question made little sense until he remembered a conversation he had over thirty years ago with a friend during a time of loss. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 27 “My only focus,” he had said, “is my overarching desire to be happy. My first wife did not make me happy, and ironically, I failed to make my second wife happy.” It then struck Chronos that, after all these years, he had believed happiness was simply the absence of sadness. He remembered asking himself a series of questions: Why can’t I just be happy? What’s wrong with me? Why is life so complex and messy?” It had not dawned on him that by constantly dwelling on his unhappiness, he had fallen into an existential sinkhole—so deep that it blocked any light from reaching him. But soon, Chronos would discover a way out and find a new path, except it would be a path of no return. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 28 Whilesitting with his friends one morning at a café, Chronos blurted out something that made everyone uneasy. “Nobody saw it coming,” he said, staring into his coffee. “What are you talking about?” one friend asked. “We never expected life to move this fast. And now, the older we get, the faster it passes!” “Never saw it coming!” Chronos echoed. “Saw what?” another friend interjected. “That one day, the only people who will truly understand us will be other old folks. Young people don't even see us. It's like we're an inconvenience to them, forgetting that we were once young and vibrant, full of life. They don't seem to accept that one day they too will grow old and wrinkled." His friends all nodded in agreement until one asked, "But didn't we feel the same way when we were young?" Without a word, Chronos stood up and walked out, leaving his friends puz- zled by the sudden shift in mood. As he closed the door, he heard laughter and a friend calling out, “A little late for a mid-life crisis!” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   29 Inthe weeks that followed, Chronos reflected on his chance encounter with the stranger in the park. It made him think about the pursuit of happiness and how his life was al- ways busy. In his youth, he recalled, life was full of mystery and adventure. Time moved at a different pace. But something shifted in his spirit when he entered adulthood. It wasn’t just the routines and new responsibilities that stifled him; it was something deeper that hindered his ability to feel fulfilled or satisfied. What puzzled Chronos even more was the suffering he had witnessed in his travels—people forced to live in slums, surviving on garbage. When he returned home, he felt he had no right to be unhappy. He did not face oppression or extreme hardship; for him, life was relatively easy. His basic needs were met. He enjoyed good health. And he was free from worries about war, famine, plague, or natural disasters. This existential paradox festered within him like a growing cancer. In his twenties, he believed success was the ultimate goal of life because it was supposed to make him happy. But as he aged, he came to think the goal was prestige. The list of what defined happiness continued to grow, transforming it into a moving target—a pursuit that left him feeling increasingly dissatisfied, lone- lier, and emptier. He felt life had played him for a fool, causing resentment to grow with each passing year. “If only there were a way to redeem lost time,” he would lament during his loneliest moments. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 30 Afew months after meeting the stranger in the park, he had a dream about time. In the dream, he found himself tied to a clock tower. One arm represented the minute hand, moving quickly as if in a race, while his other arm was the second hand, turning counterclockwise. The more he struggled to escape the clock, the faster his arms moved. He couldn’t tell if time was overpowering him or if he was resisting it. He woke up drenched in sweat and exhausted. His first thought was of the old man in the forest of Brocéliande. “Surely, he must have died a long time ago,” he mused. But then his intui- tion spoke to him, saying, “You must return to the place of your youth.” Chronos had never seriously considered going back, primarily because he feared confronting the old man. He worried that he would be disappointed in him. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   31 Amonth later, Chronos found himself sitting on an outdoor terrace, enjoying breakfast and a cup of coffee. He was in a small village, a mile from the forest of Brocéliande. Normally, he would have savored his poached eggs, but today he ate quickly, eager to continue on his journey. It took him two weeks by sea to reach Brittany and another four days to travel to this village, a few miles from where he had grown up. For Chronos, the journey felt like an eternity. But now, as he neared his destination, he forgot about the tiresome trip. Having become an avid hiker over the past decade, Chronos looked forward to exploring the forest of Brocéliande. As he finished his last bite of breakfast, he heard bells ringing for prayer at a nearby Benedictine monastery. It reminded him of his clock dream. For some reason, hearing the bell made him understand it. In the dream, the fast-moving minute hand symbolized his desire for the future to arrive quickly, just as he had complained about how long his trip to Brittany was taking. The counterclockwise-moving second hand represented his feeling of being stuck in the past. Intuitively, he sensed there was more to the dream, but at that moment he had only one thought. He stood up, finished his last sip of coffee, and as he set down the cup, a butterfly landed on the rim. He glanced at it but thought nothing of it. It didn’t take long for Chronos to leave the bustling village behind. He felt happy walking through an open field on his way to the forest, now visible in the distance. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 32 Chronoswelcomed the warm summer breeze flowing off the Bay of Bis- cay. He hadn’t felt this good in years. But the closer he got to the forest the more he felt an odd sensation. It was as if he had stepped into a painting except he was both the artist and the painting. He didn’t know what this meant, except that at different times in his life he felt he was on exhibit with no control over what others thought of him. Chronos felt it was taking a long time to reach the archway to the forest. But when he crossed over the next ridge, he stopped in amazement. All his ru- minations vanished when he saw it. The archway to the forest of Brocéliande stood before him like a majestic snow-peaked mountain. It seemed to appear out of nowhere. It was grand and mysterious as he remembered. The feeling made him for- get he was an old man. For a moment he felt like the boy he once was those many years ago when he last stood here. Chronos looked up at the archway with a nostalgic smile. He took a deep breath, held it, and slowly exhaled. “Ah . . . to be a boy again,” he said. “I have forgotten what innocent curios- ity feels like.” When Chronos looked down at the massive stone slab he could barely see the engraved words but still, he remembered how the words scared him. Although he had no idea what awaited him, Chronos strangely felt at peace. When he crossed beneath the archway he looked up at the two Latin inscrip- tions. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  33 Soon, Chronos would come to appreciate the full meaning of FELIX QUI PACIFICUS—One is happy, who is peaceful. But the meaning of the second in- scription—IN SILENTIO FORTITUDO—remained a mystery. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   34 Theearthy scent of moss-covered bark instantly brought Chronos back to the fear he felt when he first entered the forest. “How can a smell,” he wondered, “stay stored in the mind after all these years? And why can’t I recall it like a memory?” Soon, the forest's hypnotic rhythm made him feel at ease as he followed the same path. And although he knew the old man was long dead, he could not let go of hope. While enjoying the sounds of the forest, Chronos recalled something he once read: “Turn your attention to your childhood. Try to raise the sunken feel- ings of this enormous past; your personality will grow stronger, and your soli- tude will expand to become a place where you can live even in the twilight.” Although he didn't understand the reference to solitude, it made him feel as if he had stepped back into the dawn of his youth. “Back then,” he thought, “there was a purity to life. Every day was filled with enthusiasm. Where did my curiosity about life go?” As a child, Chronos remembered how time felt suspended, like an hourglass tipped on its side. Life was free from worries about the future, and there was no burden of past pain. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 35 Chronoswas now deep in the forest’s labyrinth. He was unaware of how far he had walked. He took out his pocket watch but was surprised to find it not working. After he put it away, he looked up to notice a figure walking toward him. His heart pounded. “How could this be?” he whispered to himself. “It’s not possible for him to be alive!” “Welcome home!” the old man said with a gentle smile. “It’s been a long time.” Chronos said nothing at first. Feeling nervous, he stumbled over his words, saying, “I thought you were . . . I mean . . . I did not expect to see you again. . . . How is it you are still alive?” The old man laughed. “I was fifty years old when we first met. You were a boy, so of course I seemed old to you.” He reached out his hand to Chronos, saying, “My name is Kairos Zurvān Akarāna.” When Kairos released his grip, he met the pleading gaze of Chronos. Slowly, he walked around him counterclockwise as if examining him. With a gentle voice, Kairos asked him if he had become a slave to time. “What do you mean?” Chronos answered with an ascending lisp. “I’m curious if you thought about the last question I left you with those many years ago.” Chronos felt embarrassed. Out of habit, he said, “I didn’t have time. I’ve been too busy.” Kairos chuckled softly. “Is that so?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 36 Chronos hung his head in shame. “I’m sorry. That was a reflex. The truth is much worse. I forgot the question altogether.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 37 “Forthe past few months,” Chronos said, “I’ve felt nauseous, as if I’ve been chasing a lie all these years. Now I feel weighed down by life’s unanswerable questions.” “What sort of questions?” “I don’t know where to start. This morning, for instance, I wondered why the first half of my life felt like a stopwatch while the second half resembles a countdown timer.” “I see. Anything else?” “I often ask why I can’t be more content with what I have without wanting more.” “I’m curious. Why did you say ‘with what I have?’” asked Kairos. “What do you mean?” “To say ‘with what I have’ implies ownership and possession.” “What’s wrong with that?” “An old Sage once said, ‘No one can be perfectly happy if he is afraid of losing what he possesses. On the contrary, it is this very fear that makes him miserable.’” “I never thought of it that way.” With a solemn look, he said to Kairos, “At my age, you’d think I would have noticed that by now.” He paused and added, “In recent years, I’ve reflected on the difference be- tween happiness and peace. I now wonder how this relates to the void I some- times feel. A sense of incompleteness. I’m not sure. What I do know is that I’ve The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   38 spent so much time looking outside myself for happiness, as if it were something tangible, like success.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 39 Itwas becoming clearer to Kairos why Chronos had returned. What saddened him was how common Chronos's story was. He hoped that if Chronos understood why, he would not feel so empty. But now was not the time to discuss this. Instead, he asked, “Do you think you relied on others to feel good about yourself or worthy?” Chronos looked away. “I think my disappointments and the ugliness of the world tainted everything. Somewhere along the way, I lost my sense of wonder. I certainly don’t have the joy I once felt as a child. And now, when I reflect on my life, I feel . . .” “You feel what?” “I feel I am a failure. I am a nobody. I’ve lived an uneventful life.” Kairos felt sadness in his heart upon hearing this. “I find it interesting that you use the word 'nobody,'” Kairos said slowly. “Sometimes, people believe their lives have value only if others honor them, hence the desire to impress. This also stems from the need to be better than others.” Something in Chronos resisted this notion. “This desire,” Kairos added, “also explains the need for fame; however, what is less obvious is that all such desires eventually lead to loneliness.” “If that’s true, why would anyone desire fame or affirmation?” “It’s part of the human condition. Have you not noticed how children crave attention from their parents and teachers?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   40 “Yes, but what does that have to do with our conversation? Besides, chil- dren do this instinctively.” “Precisely. That’s my point.” Chronos considered this. He had heard people discuss the human condition but never understood it. “When children become adults,” Kairos explained, “this instinct morphs into a habit. For some, the thirst for attention becomes unquenchable. No amount is ever enough. And when they find themselves alone, their craving in- tensifies. This is why the ancients believed fame is inimical to happiness.” “What does 'inimical' mean?” “To desire fame alone is to confuse lust with love. There is nothing lonelier. Yet for some, nothing is more intoxicating. To say fame is inimical to happiness is to say the desire for fame is incompatible with happiness if, that is, you believe love has anything to do with happiness.” Chronos didn’t see himself as Kairos described, but this was only because he underestimated, like others, his weakness for recognition. “This phenomenon,” Kairos said, “is like an actor who acts only for ap- plause; a writer who writes for notoriety; a singer who sings for an encore; or a politician who seeks power alone. The looming question, however, is this: What happens when the applause fades, when there is no encore, and notoriety crum- bles? Who are you then?” Chronos didn’t know what to make of this. “Come, walk with me,” he heard Kairos say. “I’m curious to learn more about what you valued throughout your life.” Chronos breathed deeply. He didn’t know how to answer this. What he did know was that these questions emotionally drained him. And then he laughed when he realized that, at his age, he was being men- tored. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 41 “In my Tradition, we have a saying: ‘How you spend your time reflects what you value in this life.’” Chronos immediately felt goosebumps on his arms. “This is significant,” Kairos added, “because what you value determines how quickly or slowly your life passes.” “I can see the truth in that,” Chronos said softly. “And aside from tragic events, you can predict how your life will end.” “What do you mean?” Chronos asked. “If you examine how you spend your time, you can foresee whether your future self will say you've had a good life.” Chronos stopped walking for a moment. “I never realized there was a connection between how quickly my life passed and the things I valued.” “I remember your grandmother telling me, ‘Love is measured by how you spend your time.’” “I think I recall her saying that.” “She also said, ‘This love extends to making time to nourish your soul.’” Kairos paused again and added, “There’s one more thing she shared with me that surprised me because I had never heard anyone express it outside my Tradition.” “Oh! What did she say?” “With eyes full of love and wisdom, she said: ‘A person’s willingness to share their time reveals how much they care for you.’” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   42 They walked in silence for a time as Chronos reminisced about his grand- mother, whom he loved dearly. The thought of her brought a smile to his face. Reflecting on her words, he wondered what his parents valued. He had spent as much time with his grandparents as with them. Even when he was with his parents, they seemed distracted or preoccupied. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 43 Likethe ever-changing breeze, Chronos’ thoughts kept shifting direction. “Lately, I find myself grieving for something I lost,” he told Kairos. “Lost?” “Time. I lost time. I’ve been haunted by time my whole life. Now, I cannot believe how old I am. Sometimes it feels like I just endured my days or did things to pass the time.” “What do you mean by that?” Kairos asked, knowing the answer. “I feel my life has slipped through my fingers,” Chronos replied blankly. He wanted to say more but didn’t know where to start. “What is it?” prompted Kairos. “I just remembered a recurring dream I’ve had. In the dream, I see myself sitting in a packed theater. At some point, I always step out to get a drink. I'm not sure why—maybe I’m bored. When I return to my seat, everyone immedi- ately stands up to applaud.” “Why?” “The performance is over. That’s how I feel about my life. It, too, is almost over. I feel I missed out on what was important. Just as I cannot tell you what the play was about, I cannot tell you what my life was about.” Chronos looked down while walking. “I think my dream relates to what you said before about what one values in life. It’s strange. I spent most of my life trying to figure it out, and now I don’t even know why it matters. My life is nearly over, and I feel a profound sense of . . . grief. “Grief?” Kairos questioned. “Because I allowed my life to pass so quickly.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   44 Kairos drew closer to Chronos. As he did, Chronos continued in a forlorn voice. “I am not more joyful because of it.” “What do you mean?” “All my searching bore no fruit. I feel like a traveler who gets lost on the way to his destination, only to wake up one day to discover that not only did he forget where he was heading but why!” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 45 Kairos listened intently, saddened to hear Chronos speak this way. He recalled the joy he had as a boy. But time eroded his passions, making his soul as illegible as worn pages in a book. Now, Kairos understood why the spiral of life had brought him back to the forest of Brocéliande. Yet, he sensed that part of Chronos believed it was too late to turn things around. The good news was that Kairos knew of a way to bring him back. In his Tradition, there is always a way forward, even for those who feel defeated. He had seen this many times before; some people must take a circui- tous route through life before discovering what the ancients called the Way. Kairos realized it was too soon to explain the meaning of the Way, but at least now he knew Chronos was ripe. The dilemma for Kairos was finding the right time to guide his soul. In his Tradition, it was always about finding the right questions. “Have you ever had a personal credo?” he asked, stopping to look at Chronos. “Credo? You mean like a creed?” “Yes.” “No. I don’t believe so.” “Since you mentioned feeling lost, do you think it would have helped to have a guiding principle to direct your travels through life, especially when nav- igating complex relationships?” “Does something like that exist?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   46 “It does.” Chronos wondered how this could have helped him make better choices, particularly in relationships. Kairos smiled. “Let’s continue walking,” was all he said. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   47 Theprevious conversation prompted Chronos to reflect on how often he compared his life to those he believed were better off, whose lives seemed more exciting and glamorous. He assumed they were happier. Chronos shared his thoughts with Kairos, mentioning that he countered these feelings by practicing gratitude. “Gratitude has its limits,” Kairos warned. “What do you mean? Isn’t gratitude always positive?” “Not if you use it to contrast your life to others.” Chronos scratched his head. Kairos continued, “Let’s say you feel down and compare your life to those who are worse off to feel better. You might say, ‘I am thankful for this or that compared to this person or that person.’ Or, ‘I’m grateful I don’t live in that country or city.’ Or, ‘I’m glad I don’t work there.’ The problem with this mind- set is that it makes it impossible to experience peace or joy if . . .” “If what?” “If you need to compare your life to others to feel good about your own.” Chronos remained silent, realizing he had done this. He wondered if it con- tributed to his overall discontent. “There’s another reason people compare themselves to others, but it’s less obvious. I will tell you, but it’s not something I’ve shared with anyone outside my Tradition.” For the first time, Chronos was curious about why Kairos was mentoring him. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   48 “Imagineyou have something important to tell someone,” Kairos said, “and you’ve rehearsed it in your mind. But when the time comes to share, you realize this person isn’t in the right frame of mind to hear it. This means they won’t be receptive to your words or might misinterpret your intentions.” “How is this related to what we’re discussing?” “If you live semi-consciously, you cannot receive wisdom. The reason I ha- ven’t spoken to others outside my Tradition about this guiding principle is that people are often not open to hearing it.” “Wait. What guiding principle?” “We will discuss this more soon. For now, all I can say is that everyone needs a guide when they’re lost. Once you’re pointed in the right direction, you can follow a distant point that will lead you home. By staying alert, you won’t stray too far off your chosen path.” “I understand.” “What I was about to say is that if people are not receptive to the collective wisdom, they will continue their lives without understanding why they are un- happy. Discovering that you are semi-conscious is one thing, but knowing this and not being curious to expand your consciousness is another.” Chronos said nothing. He wondered if this was a veiled way of describing him. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   49 “When you do not have love in your life or live alone because you've struggled to maintain relationships, this emptiness needs to be filled, one way or another—it is this search that explains why life passes so quickly.” Chronos breathed deeply. This was not something he wanted to hear right now. “Can we sit on this rock?” Chronos asked. “Of course.” “Have some water,” Kairos said, handing him his canteen. As they sat in silence, Kairos wondered if he had shared too much. Then again, he knew that increasing awareness is never easy. People who want to improve themselves often give up because they find it painfully slow or, worse, feel unworthy. What concerned Chronos was the cracks forming in his consciousness, as if a dam was about to burst. In the past, he would have tried to outrun his malaise by seeking higher ground, but this time he knew that wouldn’t be possible. As they sat quietly on the rock, Chronos was curious about the guiding principle that Kairos had mentioned. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   50 Asthey rested on the rock, Chronos shared with Kairos a memory of a con- versation he had long ago with a friend. “One day, he confided in me, saying, ‘I’ve spent my life trying to control everything, hoping to reach a point when everything would fall into place so I could relax. Only in hindsight did I realize I had reduced my life to a means to an end.’” “‘Over time,’ my friend continued, ‘I became increasingly impatient. Eve- rything took longer than expected. Although I still lived a luxurious lifestyle, I knew deep down that peace had eluded me. This puzzled me because I experi- enced more joy when I was young, even though I owned nothing. I sometimes wonder if it was my perfectionism that drained me or if it was my ambition to be better than others.’” “There is no greater disappointment in life,” Kairos said, “than finally achieving what you’ve been striving for only to feel let down. What else did your friend say?” “Since I hadn’t seen him in a long time, I didn’t know what had happened to him. I will never forget what he said next. He told me that two years prior, his house burned down, his parents died, and that same year his only child died in an accident. I was shocked and saddened by the news. After sharing this, he fell silent. And then, in a trembling voice, he said, ‘Life brought me to my knees, and I learned a harsh truth.’” “What did he say?” asked Kairos. “Slowly, he said, ‘Joy or peace is not attained by lining everything up. Life cannot be controlled—even an oasis changes.’” Chronos paused and glanced away for a moment. “It is what my friend said next that touched me the most.” “Go on,” Kairos said. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  51 “With tears in his eyes, he told me, ‘I would give up everything I have worked so hard to achieve to have my son back. I want the peace I once knew, to experience unfiltered love and pure joy. I want to be loved for who I am, not for what I have.’” Kairos too felt sad to hear about his friend. Apart from tragic events he knew that pain mostly stems from relationships. “I believe what your friend voiced is possible at any age. However, in my Tradition, we believe there are certain preconditions that make this possible.” Chronos wasn’t convinced. “There is no cure for suffering,” he said. “Once it rips you open, life’s vultures come for you.” Chronos remained silent for a moment until his cynical side spoke. “I sup- pose you would suggest that my friend should have given his wealth away.” “No,” Kairos said firmly. “Something far more difficult. In fact, it is some- thing all humans must do. It is one of the preconditions I am speaking about.” “And what’s that?” Chronos asked, unsure he wanted to know. “To discover what your will to live is.” Chronos felt disheartened. The thought of answering that question ex- hausted him. For a moment, he regretted returning to the forest of Brocéliande. He was ready to keep walking, but Kairos said he needed a few more minutes. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 52 AfterChronos silenced his negative voice, he thought about his inability to find lasting peace, satisfaction, or fulfillment. He wondered if the void he felt for much of his life stemmed from an un- spoken need for attention, to feel special, to please others, or to be praised. At first, Chronos found this thought shocking. “If true, would this mean these emotions are part of the human condition?” he asked himself. “How many decisions did I make under the influence of these desires?” As he reflected further, he realized he had deluded himself into believing that he could only rest or enjoy life once he finished a project. But this rarely happened. His restless heart kept him busy with more tasks, as if to distract him from some vague longing. Yet he knew he lived a frenzied and scattered existence, always racing against the clock as if addicted to being busy. It wasn’t until he turned sixty-five that he finally asked himself, “What kept me so busy over the years?” After a long pause, Chronos expressed his astonishment at his own lack of awareness. Kairos glanced at him without saying a word. “I cannot pinpoint a specific moment when dissatisfaction crept into my soul,” Chronos confessed. “It was gradual, like the tide coming in. It went un- noticed until I found myself standing waist-deep in the mess I created. Before I knew it, I was treading through life.” “And, of course,” Kairos added, “you can only tread for so long before ex- haustion drowns you.” Chronos nodded. “I remember a time when I felt secure in my accomplish- ments, yet fear lingered to remind me that everything could wash away. At some point, my accomplishments lost their . . .” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   53 “What?” “I’m not sure exactly.” “Significance?” “Yes. They lost their significance in providing lasting meaning or happiness. I can’t say for sure, but I may have believed my successes would subdue my loneliness. What I do know is that the hole in my soul became a festering wound. I kept dressing it without addressing the causes of my spiritual infec- tion.” “That is an evocative way of expressing our pain,” Kairos said gently. “It sounds like you covered your loneliness with a blanket to hide it.” “I think you’re right. It seems so obvious now. In my feeble attempts to feel better I busied myself. I suppose it was my way of warming my spirit so it wouldn’t freeze.” Chronos sat still as they remained seated on the rock, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees and his chin resting in his hands. He watched a chip- munk scurry around his feet. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 54 Thisinsight made Chronos question the distinction between the need for acceptance and the need for attention. He wasn’t sure, but he believed his need for acceptance outweighed his desire for attention. Chronos took a deep breath. He didn’t want to voice his thoughts but did so anyway. “There was a time in my life when I felt nothing—absolutely nothing. All my desires and hopes were drained. I did things—some of which I’m ashamed of—that were like pouring alcohol on a wound. Not because I was a masochist, but because the pain made me feel . . .” “Made you feel what?” After a long awkward pause, Chronos added, “I don’t know. Alive, maybe. I think the self-inflicted pain displaced the emptiness inside me. Or rather, it made me feel less empty.” “Empty from what?” “Empty from my lack of love, including for myself. Sometimes, I think this lack stemmed from the rejection I felt from time to time.” Chronos paused again, lost in a memory. “What is it?” asked Kairos. “I wonder if I ever truly knew how to love or what love is supposed to look like. Everything now seems anticlimactic.” “What does?” “Life!” Chronos sighed. “When I was young, I had so many dreams and aspirations,” he continued as tears rolled down his cheeks. “Help me,” is all he could say with a tinge of desperation. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   55 Kairos felt for Chronos. He gently placed his hand on his shoulder. He was about to share an ancient proverb about pain, but he knew Chronos needed more than words. He needed companionship. He needed someone to listen without judgment or advice . . . so instead of telling Chronos the proverb—the only way out is in— Kairos sat down alongside his pain. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 56 “Come, let’s continue our walk,” Kairos said, standing up from the rock and extending his hand to help Chronos. “Good idea. My legs are getting stiff.” When Kairos sensed that Chronos was open to listening again, he said, “I would like to share something with you that you might find upsetting. You may even feel I’m disparaging what you just confided in me.” “Go ahead,” Chronos sighed. “I’m sure I’ve heard it before.” “If you see your life as anticlimactic, then this is the voice of despair. What if there is another way to look at your life? Is it possible that your own expecta- tions dug a hole in your heart?” “I never thought about it like that,” Chronos said, pondering his words. “You shared before that you wanted to feel accepted and even stand out. You built your life around proving yourself. This is also an expectation.” “True.” “Now, think about times when you received some form of praise but still wanted more.” As Chronos reflected, he wondered if a part of him was always dissatisfied, a feeling that seemed to grow like a slow drip accumulating over the years. This made him question the difference between feeling dissatisfied and being unsat- isfied. “This may surprise you,” Kairos said gravely, “but most humans fill their time like someone trying to fill a sieve with water.” Chronos was about to say that this was futile until he realized most of his experiences seemed to flow through him like a sieve. This shocked him. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 57 “Much of what I did with my time,” he finally said, “only left me feeling emptier!” “The good news, Chronos, is that you now recognize this.” “Maybe my disaffection wasn’t with life per se but with how I thought life should be. I suppose my dissolution was inevitable. But you’re right. I expected life to conform to my expectations. I wanted people to believe what I believed. I expected things to happen when I thought they should. And I wanted love without sharing my time. No wonder everything flowed through me like a sieve. I suppose this is what I meant by anticlimactic. But given what you just said . . .” Chronos looked away with a blank expression. “What is it?” asked Kairos. “I’m not sure how to express this. I guess what I’m trying to say is that what was supposed to make me happy was, in fact, impossible from the start. Did I ever know what happiness looks like?” Kairos said nothing. He waited for the debris of his thoughts to settle before sharing a well-known aphorism from his Tradition: “The eternal error people make is to imagine that happiness consists in the gratification of their wishes.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  58 “I think you are brave, Chronos,” Kairos said, placing his hand on his pupil’s shoulder. “I don’t feel it,” Chronos replied, looking away. “Nothing is more courageous than being vulnerable and allowing yourself to be seen in your brokenness. Revealing your fears and disappointments to the right person at the right time can free you from whatever is holding you back from metamorphizing.” Chronos didn’t understand what Kairos meant by metamorphizing, but it reminded him of something Kairos had said earlier. “You mentioned that the desire for fame can make people lonely. Why did you tell me this? I am not famous.” “Because when happiness sits on a thin line, it wobbles.” “I’m not a fan of riddles,” Chronos retorted. “Happiness is a delicate balance that collapses when disconnected from re- lationships. Some people, like the famous, wealthy, or powerful, may never know who their true friends are since everyone wants something from them. However, there is one group that recognizes this trap.” “Who?” “Elderly people. And those who are terminally ill. When your life is nearly over, fame, wealth, and power—or your perceived failures—will weigh less if you have meaningful relationships to nourish you. This could be a caring com- panion, a loving family, or genuine friends. This is where grace is found . . .” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 59 Kairos paused before continuing. He saw sadness in Chronos’ eyes and needed to redirect his pain, so he asked if he remembered the children’s story of the boy who cried wolf. “Sort of,” Chronos replied slowly, curious how this related to their conver- sation. “Wasn’t the moral about the dangers of lying?” “Yes. But the more interesting question is, why did the boy lie in the first place?” “I don’t know. For attention?” “Precisely. But why?” “What do you mean?” “Some find power in knowledge, others in money, and those who cannot attain fame find it in status or by helping others.” “How can you compare helping others,” Chronos interrupted, “to those who only desire power or fame?” “It may surprise you, but all of these desires share something in common, albeit subconsciously.” “What’s that?” “The impulse to escape the gravity of loneliness.” “Loneliness? That makes no sense,” Chronos replied defensively. “It’s not obvious, I know. But the desire for attention and the wish to over- come loneliness are often two sides of the same coin.” Chronos wondered if this could be true. Had he lived his life suppressing, or worse, displacing his loneliness by seeking attention? The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  60 His cynical side would not accept this. And yet, he knew there was an in- discernible void in his life. He found it strange to say, but he recognized how often he avoided this void. “Maybe,” he thought, “this is why I took refuge in hope.” Chronos wasn’t sure what to make of all this. What he did know was that at his lowest, all he yearned for was love, comfort, and understanding. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 61 The path they walked resembled a maze, making it impossible to know which direction it would take. Chronos tried to guess the time except the forest canopy was too dense to see the sun’s position. When they turned the next bend, the path straightened for about a hundred yards. Chronos squinted, unsure if his eyes were deceiving him; he thought he saw a large animal approaching. “Is that what I think it is?” he asked. “Yes, it’s a mouflon.” “I’ve never seen one that big!” “Normally, these wild sheep don’t grow that large.” When the mouflon reached them they stepped aside to allow the animal to pass, but it stopped between them. Chronos gazed at its majestic spiral horns. To his shock, the mouflon looked up at him as if it wanted to speak. In his mind, Chronos heard a word he had never encountered before, guess- ing it was in a foreign language. Soon, he would discover its meaning and how it would become like a key. Kairos smiled. “What is it?” Chronos asked. “This is a good omen. The ancient Druids believed that when a mouflon crosses your path, it signifies that you are not alone in your quest.” Kairos gently placed his hand on the mouflon’s head. While caressing it, he traced the curve of its spiraled horn with his index finger. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   62 “What is it?” Kairos asked, noticing Chronos's perplexed expression. “I was just about to say that my search for greater meaning has only left me more tired and alone.” Kairos looked at him like a loving father saying, “Whoever takes time to nurture friendship is never truly alone. This is why Seneca, the great Stoic phi- losopher, once said: ‘When a person spends all his time on foreign travel, he ends his travels with many acquaintances but no friends.’” “But that’s just it. I didn’t take the time.” “What’s stopping you now?” “I don’t know. Maybe fear. At different times in my life, I’ve disappointed a few people and sometimes neglected those I love. I suppose, to use your words, I valued the wrong things in life.” Kairos removed his hand from the mouflon to let it continue its journey. He moved closer to Chronos and said, “There is something you can do.” As Chronos wondered what this could be, he stood still, watching the mouf- lon. To his surprise the mouflon paused for a moment. It turned to look at him and then disappeared beyond the next bend. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 63 Chronos wanted to tell Kairos the word he heard when the mouflon stood between them, but Kairos asked if he would like to know how to heal past wounds. Chronos replied halfheartedly that he would, not believing this was possi- ble. “This teaching from my Tradition does not apply to all situations, but in most cases, it is a powerful way to cauterize wounds. However, I should warn you . . . you won’t like the idea at first.” Chronos stared blankly at Kairos. “What if,” Kairos said calmly, “you wrote a letter to those who have hurt you and to those you have hurt?” Chronos winced. He could not imagine doing this. Just the thought of it exhausted him. And besides, there was one letter he could not write. “What if the person is dead?” he asked. “When you finish writing the letter, bring it to their final resting place.” “And then what?” “Read it out loud to them. When you’re done, burn it over the gravesite to allow the ashes of your words to fall over them.” Chronos’ eyes widened. He did not expect that. “What if this person is cre- mated?” he asked. “Do the same. This time, place the ashes of the letter in the urn.” Chronos didn’t know what to make of this. He wanted to trust Kairos, ex- cept he found the suggestion peculiar. Even so, he tried to imagine himself doing it. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   64 “If I were to write these letters,” he said, “I don’t think I would know where to begin.” “Let’s say it’s someone you’ve disappointed. You could start by saying, ‘If I could live my life over again—given what I know now—I would have done things differently.’” Chronos felt regret rising. The prospect of reliving his past pains terrified him. Yet, he knew this feeling was not unique to him. Everyone wonders if they’ve used their time wisely. Kairos placed his hand on Chronos’ shoulder and suggested they continue. He was surprised that Chronos had not asked where they were going but figured he was absorbed in his thoughts. “Besides,” he thought, “it’s better he doesn’t know.” This made Kairos recall the human tendency to want to know things in advance, yet in other areas of life, this is not true. For example, fiction readers never want to know the ending before the beginning. They enjoy the suspense of the unknown, but in life, humans prefer certainty. Some even turn to astrol- ogers or fortune-tellers to glimpse their future because they want assurance, not suspense. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 65 Kairosreturned to the topic of writing letters. “I know you believe it’s too late,” he said, “but it’s not. Don’t hesitate by overthinking it. Promise me you’ll at least consider writing these letters. After- wards, you can decide what to do with them.” Reluctantly, Chronos agreed. He wanted to believe this could help but felt relieved to know he wasn’t obligated to send them. “I can assure you,” Kairos said, “you’ll be amazed at how you feel after mailing each letter.” Chronos remained silent, waiting for Kairos to continue. “You will experience a spiritual catharsis. A weight will lift—one you didn’t even know you were carrying.” Chronos asked, “Do you think writing down a painful memory that can’t be mailed could also be healing?” “For many, it can. There’s tremendous power in voicing past trauma, as long as it doesn’t reinforce a victim mentality.” “But some people truly are victims!” “Sadly, you’re right. However, for some, victimhood becomes their iden- tity as a means to elicit self-pity. In a peculiar way, this gives them strength.” “All I know,” Chronos said slowly, “is that I don’t want to cope anymore. But I also don’t want to relive the past.” “There’s a vast difference between reliving and releasing.” “Maybe,” Chronos replied softly. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   66 “Like a blood clot, certain memories create blockages. Clots are dangerous because they obstruct blood flow. Similarly, memories can hinder your meta- morphosis, trapping you in misery.” Kairos was right, but Chronos wasn’t ready to go there. He again wondered what he meant by metamorphosis. “When you sit in front of a blank piece of paper and pick up a pen—in the right state of mind—you’ll find that your pen channels something deep within you. This happens when your intention isn’t to prove you’re right or hurt the other person, but simply to express yourself.” Chronos knew this wouldn’t be easy. Like everyone, he desired to prove himself right. “There’s one more thing,” Kairos added. Chronos wasn’t sure he wanted to hear it. This was already too much to digest. He felt a knot in his stomach. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 67 “If you write these letters, send them without expectations—meaning with- out anticipating the response you desire. You may not even receive a reply. The fact is, you don’t know how your letter will be interpreted or if the recipient will be in a good state of mind when reading it. Before sending each letter, I advise you to wait two weeks and then reread it. After that, wait another week and share it with a friend, but don’t read it aloud to them.” “Why not?” “Because you will read it with your own intonation, emphasis, and pace. In other words, you’ll read the letter the way you want it to be heard. The recipient won’t do this.” “True.” “Regardless of how your letter is received, writing it will provide closure. It will free you from lingering emotions—powerful feelings that have restrained your spirit. By expressing your pain or the pain you’ve caused, you become aware of how certain memories have tethered you to your past. Once you cut those ties, you’re free to move on and begin anew.” Just hearing this, Chronos already felt lighter. “Make sure,” Kairos added, “that your primary intention in writing these letters is not to absolve your conscience. This will only cause more pain if the other person senses your intention.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   68 While gazing into the forest, Kairos reflected on his conversation with Chronos. He was surprised at his resistance, yet he knew that throughout his- tory, many people start strong but don’t finish well. His Tradition did not be- lieve this was inevitable. “After all these years,” Chronos confessed, “I remain a puzzle to myself. There have been rare moments when I’ve had a glimmer . . . . when I felt any- thing was possible until the wind changed direction. Dark clouds rolled in to block the light. Now, after speaking with you, I realize the light was never gone; it was only hidden.” Chronos paused to look through the spaces between the trees, enjoying the sunlight flickering on the forest floor. “And yet,” he continued, “I still ask myself what the point of it all is.” Kairos listened with compassion. It is a question everyone eventually asks. “If there is to be a point,” he said softly, “what do you want the point to be?” Kairos walked ahead, sensing Chronos needed space. He worried the con- versation might make him feel spiritually claustrophobic. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  69 Chronosfelt stung by the question. His legs weakened. No one had ever asked him this before; it felt like a punch to the stomach. Kairos rephrased the question, “What should the point of life be if you could choose it for yourself?” Chronos’ mind raced. His life flashed before his eyes. When his breathing returned to normal, he found it strange to admit he couldn't answer the question, despite limping through life complaining about his lack of purpose. But then again, he always found something to complain about. “Have you ever asked yourself,” Kairos continued, “why you felt the need to know the answer?” Chronos again felt disoriented. “No,” was his first thought. “Maybe I thought that if I knew the answer with certainty, life would finally make sense. It would have meaning.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 70 “Do you think it’s possible to experience love or appreciate beauty without understanding what love and beauty mean?” Kairos asked. “I suppose so.” “Can you imagine how your life would improve if you knew the answer?” Chronos didn't understand the relevance of the question. What he did know was that he believed life should have meaning. “I have no idea,” he finally said, taking a deep breath. “If I had meaning, at least it would feel like someone was pointing me in the right direction.” “I find it interesting that you say ‘in the right direction.’” “Why?” “Because it implies both a journey and a destination.” “Is there a difference?” “Not all journeys have a final destination. Consider how a vacation differs from traveling. Vacations are mostly planned, including where you’ll stay and what you’ll see. Traveling is different. It’s a journey because you don’t know where you’ll end up or where you’ll eat or sleep. It’s about discovering new places and meeting people from different cultures. Isn’t this what makes a jour- ney worthwhile? The mystery of it.” Chronos nodded reluctantly, recognizing he lived his life more like a vaca- tion. “But there is one problem if life is indeed a journey.” Chronos couldn’t imagine what that could be. “No human,” Kairos said slowly, “is born wise.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   71 Chronos stumbled over a stone. When he regained his balance, something occurred to him. If what Kairos said was true, it would explain so much about human history and why people behave as they do. “No one,” Kairos added, “is born with foreknowledge of how to navigate this life. And without guidance, it’s only a matter of time until one feels lost, lonely, and overwhelmed—but it doesn’t have to be this way.” Chronos wanted to believe this, but he had lived long enough to know how the relentless waves of uncertainty wore him down. So much so that when he looked in the mirror he felt like a stranger. He remembered turning sixty-five and saying, “I barely recognize myself.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 72 Asthey continued their walk along the winding path, Chronos took a break from thinking to watch the sunlight create patterns on the forest floor. “If you think life is a journey,” Kairos continued, “imagine you are in a boat in the middle of the ocean. A tropical storm is approaching with ten-foot swells. You would be relieved to remember that your boat was built by the finest engi- neers using the strongest materials.” “Of course!” “Now, imagine you learn to build boats yourself. One day, someone tells you about buried treasure in a distant land that will bring you fame and fortune. Over time, you become convinced that finding this treasure will make you happy. But in your excitement to cross the ocean, you rush to build your boat, even though you know the treasure will have no value if you sink.” “I’m not sure where you’re going with this,” Chronos interrupted. “Humans spend so much time focused on their treasure quests—called dreams and ambitions—that they leave no time to build their best selves. The boat represents you; the building process is metamorphosis; the engineers are the sages of the world. Some call this building process education, except not all education is created equal. And some believe the goal of education is merely to learn a vocation, whereas in my Tradition this is secondary.” “Why?” “It doesn’t matter what your job is if you are unhappy in your family life or feel lonely. Unfortunately, people prefer to arrive quickly rather than learn how to navigate. This is risky, as the future, like the weather, is always unpredictable. It’s inevitable to get pulled off course, and if this happens gradually, you won’t notice until it’s too late.” “Why are you telling me this?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   73 “Because there is a danger in rushing the preparation process. Young people often have an unspoken desire to move on with life quickly, not realizing that navigating relationships—especially parenting—requires prudence that must be learned.” “I see what you mean. Relationships require specific skills, just like playing La soule well.” “Ah, La soule. A true team sport. The last time I played, there were eighty players on each side.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   74 Chronosfelt time stop. He had a strange vision of seeing all his relation- ships float in the air, merging piece by piece to form a large painting. He saw himself standing alone in an empty art gallery. As he stretched his neck to look up, he realized how small he felt. Only when he stepped back did he notice the image resembled a mosaic, except there was a piece missing in the center. This reminded him of his walk to the forest of Brocéliande that morning. He felt as if he had stepped into a painting, being both the artist and the artwork. He wasn’t sure who held the paintbrush. Was he the sole creator of his life? If so, the canvas had limitations. Still, it made no sense that he could be both the subject and the object. His thoughts were interrupted by the voice of Kairos. “If you succeed in fulfilling your dreams,” Kairos continued, “but invite the wrong people to accompany you on your journey, or become unpleasant to be around, your journey will be miserable, and all your accomplishments will seem anticlimactic. Isn’t this why you asked me what the point of life is?” Chronos didn’t know what to say. He felt exposed by the question and em- barrassed for letting the busyness of life define him. “I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised,” he said to himself, “that the older I get, the more isolated I feel.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   75 “What I’m trying to say, Chronos, is that there are countless treasures out there and many places to visit; however, none are necessarily more important than others. What counts are the people who accompany you. The danger is believing there’s only one destination for you. This is why preparing your soul for the journey is more critical than arriving. In other words, if the boat is built wisely, you can go anywhere. It doesn’t matter where you end up. What matters is how you feel on your journey. Do you understand what I am saying?” “I think so,” Chronos replied, wanting to feel hopeful. “It is for this reason that in my Tradition we encourage our young to spend as much time as possible building the best ship for their journey, so that no mat- ter where life takes them or who they meet, they can always use the wind to their advantage.” “If building the best boat is what education is supposed to be about,” Chronos added, “then this is not what I experienced.” At that moment, Chronos realized he had allowed the destination—defined by his hopes and dreams—to limit his journey. “It is the person you become in your doing that matters most,” Kairos said, turning to look at him. Chronos quietly contemplated whether metamorphosis is the guiding prin- ciple Kairos spoke about earlier. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 76 “Would you like another drink of water?” Kairos asked, handing over his canteen. Chronos took a sip, wiped his mouth, and held the canteen while reflecting on how remarkable it was to be back in the forest of Brocéliande. “You know,” Kairos said, “over the years, I’ve had similar conversations. It’s interesting how often the subject of time comes up.” “In what way?” Chronos asked. “Even though many people claim that gaining wealth isn't their reason for living, they admit they spend excessive time working, even when it isn't neces- sary.” “But maybe some people work so much because they’re unhappy at home, or because their job gives them a sense of purpose, or because wealth offers more freedom and acceptance.” “That might be true, but we’ve been discussing pursuing something to fill an unexplainable void.” Chronos didn't like Kairos' comment and tried to change the subject. “You seem to imply that ambition is a problem." “No, it isn’t. But let me ask you this: Would you agree that money is a means to an end?” “I would.” Kairos studied Chronos closely, unsure if he grasped the weight of the ques- tion. “There is a crucial difference between a necessary condition and a sufficient condition.” “I don’t follow.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  77 “I’ll give you an example. A necessary condition for a forest fire is dry ground.” “Agreed.” “But something else is needed, like a spark. That’s the sufficient condition.” “I understand the difference, but how does this apply to our discussion?” “It matters in many ways. In my Tradition, we teach our young people to recognize both conditions before entering adulthood. This is important because during a rite of passage ceremony, a question is posed to them. It marks their transition from depending on their parents to finding their own way as they enter their next metamorphosis called adulthood.” “Fascinating,” Chronos said, still pondering how strange it is to speak of human metamorphosis. He then recalled the butterfly landing on his coffee cup earlier that morning. “What is the question?” he asked. “What are the necessary and sufficient conditions for a good life?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  78 Asa young man, Chronos equated a good life with a successful life, which is why the question glitched in his mind. What mattered to him was being accomplished in the eyes of others since he felt he had something to prove. The idea of spiritual growth would have held no appeal. Kairos stopped walking. He needed Chronos to focus. Now was the time to ask him something he had been waiting for: “If money is a means to an end . . . what is the end toward which money is the means?” The question sounded disjointed to Chronos. “I don’t know how to answer that,” was all he could say. Kairos was not surprised. He had seen this before with people living in a half-awakened state, even though they complained that their lives hadn’t turned out as they imagined. They didn’t question their expectations. Kairos later discovered that people outside his Tradition believed life would eventually reward them for their hard work, as if fulfillment could only be found in accomplishments. This was why the idea of metamorphosis remained foreign to them. As they continued their walk, Chronos pondered the question: If money is a means to an end... what is the end toward which money is the means? He recognized something profound about it but still couldn’t answer. This bothered him, as the question seemed straightforward. He decided to rephrase it in his mind: If money is a means to an end, what is the end game? The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   79 “So you think there’s a universally accepted definition of unhappiness?” asked Kairos. “I have no idea. What I do know is that not everyone agrees on what hap- piness is.” “I think now is a good time to tell you about a thought experiment used as a rite of passage in my Tradition.” “What’s that?” Chronos asked, unsure if he wanted to hear it. “Imagine being offered a substance that could eliminate your anxiety, an- other that would extend your life, and a third that would make you feel happy. Would you take them?” “Of course.” “Would you take them if they came with a condition?” “Depends on the condition. Who doesn’t want to live anxiety-free and have a long, happy life? What’s the condition?” “The condition is that once you take these substances, you must live alone.” “You mean no interaction with anyone?” “That’s right.” “I don’t get it. What would be the point of living longer?” “Precisely. What would be the point?” Chronos shook his head. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 80 “Go back in time to ancient Greece and imagine you are training for the Olympics. Someone offers you a substance to enhance your performance, claim- ing it will guarantee your victory. Would you take it?” “Absolutely not. If I win, I want it to be an authentic victory, one I earned.” “Then why would you be so quick to take something to feel better?” “It’s not comparable,” Chronos replied. “Are you sure?” Chronos shook his head. “What I do know is that I already feel alone. And to make matters worse, my anxiety feels like a constant background hum.” Chronos took a deep breath and added, “The thought of having no interac- tions with others is unbearable.” “That is what unhappiness is,” Kairos said. “Loneliness?” “Yes,” replied Kairos. “Now do you see that happiness is more than just a feeling?” “Sure, when you put it that way.” “And wouldn’t that also mean no special substance would necessarily give you what you want?” “You mean true companionship?” “That’s right. Remember, you said you wouldn’t take something to feel better if it meant living alone. Some people are alone because of their choices, and a substance cannot fix this. It can only mask the pain by making one feel good. In other words, something more is needed. We will discuss this later, but first I want to ask you: Do you think life has been unfair to you?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  81 “I do! My life didn’t turn out the way I hoped. I feel increasingly lost. I’ve been living an unlived life, always thinking about the life I didn’t have.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 82 Kairosstopped walking to look at Chronos. “There’s the life we imagined living—those many years ago—and then there is the life we now live, which bears no resemblance to the imagined life we once hoped for.” “Do you mean to say that there is the life we hoped to have and then there’s the life we ended up having, except the two don’t resemble one another?” “Yes.” “It sounds like you’re saying having dreams is futile or that I should have lowered my expectations to avoid disappointment. If so, this would be a life without risk or reward.” “Aspirations aren’t futile. I’m not minimizing broken dreams. I want you to see the subtle distinction between unfulfilled dreams and those meant to bring you happiness.” “I don’t get it! What’s the point of dreaming then?” “It’s one thing to have dreams,” Kairos replied, “and quite another to expect that fulfilling them will solve your problems or bring instant happiness. Some- times, you need to reframe your expectations.” “Reframe?” “Humans frame their lives around a narrative for strength.” “Meaning?” “It’s not the image of your life that keeps you stuck; it’s how you’ve framed that image.” Chronos laughed. “Was that supposed to be an answer?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 83 Kairos chuckled. “Let me put it another way: no matter how beautiful a painting is, it loses its luster if placed in a frame that doesn’t complement it.” “True. But the image can exist without a frame.” “Agreed. Now, compare this to framing your dreams around your will to live.” “Wait. Are you suggesting my search for happiness depended on finding the perfect frame? And that's why I spent my time waiting for my dreams to come true, because my will to live depended on it?” “Yes,” Kairos replied. “This is hard to process.” Chronos was silent for a few minutes, then smirked. “Maybe I should have taken the image of myself off the wall.” Kairos knew he was joking without realizing how insightful this was. Some- times wisdom comes disguised as humor. As Chronos reflected on their conversation, he remembered telling a friend during a low point, “Nothing makes me happy . . . and I fear nothing ever will.” He recalled what was happening in his life when he said that, but he wasn’t ready to share it with Kairos. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   84 Sunlightflickered through the leaves overhead, creating a mosaic of light and shadow that danced across their faces as they walked. Chronos heard his cynical voice say, “It is easier to live in ignorance.” He quickly brushed it aside and told Kairos he found it interesting how some people’s dreams of happiness can be another person’s nightmare. "That is an insightful observation," Kairos said. “This speaks to the contin- gency of happiness." Chronos had no idea what that meant. "To say happiness is contingent means it depends on certain events occur- ring first. For instance, if you dream of moving to another country or city, or dream of ‘making it’ as the saying goes, or dream of achieving something, then you likely believe your happiness can only arise from favorable circumstances." Chronos needed to think about this. It didn’t make sense to him. "Although changing your life’s circumstances," Kairos added, "is necessary if you are oppressed, it is not sufficient for happiness. As we discussed, some- thing beyond good fortune is needed for a fulfilling life." The conversation left Chronos feeling tired. Part of him resisted accepting what Kairos was saying, as it felt like he was dismantling his most basic assump- tions about life. It occurred to him that his pride would have dismissed much of what Kairos said had he heard it before turning fifty-five. Now that he had lived a long life and made enough mistakes, he felt it was time to consider viewing life through a different lens. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   85 “There is one particular dream,” Kairos began tentatively, “that is more powerful than all others. In some ways, it is the subtext of dreams, even more influential than the dream of happiness, though not always conscious. In my Tradition, we believe the pursuit of this dream leads people to ignore metamor- phosis, thinking they are above it and have no need to transform themselves.” “I don’t understand,” Chronos said, still unclear about the meaning of met- amorphosis. “Some people refuse to acknowledge any need to metamorphosize because their pride interprets this as weakness or, worse, being inferior. Unfortunately, this insatiable dream I’m speaking about also causes much tragedy and misery. In fact, it has shaped—and continues to shape—the course of world history. It has formed nations, sparked wars, and destroyed countless lives.” Chronos tried to guess where Kairos was heading but had no idea what he was talking about. “What I am referring to is the desire for glory—to be envied and loved above all others, which for some is also a form of power.” Chronos recognized his younger self in Kairos's words. They rang true. He had been overly ambitious in his desire to surpass others. He could not figure out where this passion came from or why, but at his age, it no longer mattered. He no longer felt envy as he once did, nor did he seek acceptance. Soon, he would learn how the desire for acceptance is misplaced when seek- ing approval becomes a substitute for love. This simple truth, he would discover, has profound consequences for un- derstanding why so many are unhappy. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 86 “For many people,” Kairos continued, “there is no greater ambition than to be admired, validated, or remembered for eternity. This drive to win at all costs stems from that desire. Sadly, more lives have been sacrificed—literally and fig- uratively—at the altar of glory than for any other reason. And for reasons be- yond themselves, many people fritter away their lives, enslaved by this phan- tom. They may believe they have power. They may think they are superior. But from the perspective of the universe, they have no more power than the most popular kid in school. Instead, they seek acceptance through attention, unaware of why they crave it.” Chronos recognized something profound in Kairos's words, though he struggled to process it all. “I suppose," he said, "in one way or another, we are all conquered people.” “Indeed. Only to the extent that people awaken from their subconscious desire for superiority can the human species transcend what my Tradition calls destruction by glory.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 87 Even though they had been walking for some time, Chronos realized he had no idea where Kairos was leading him. Maybe to his village, he hoped. He was okay with not knowing. Chronos was just happy to be back in the forest with him and for Kairos to share the secrets of his Tradition. Soon, Chronos would discover that Kairos wasn’t sharing secrets but frag- ments of what is called collective wisdom. “Take a moment,” he heard Kairos say, “to consider how you feel about your life.” Chronos slowed his pace. He didn’t want to express his true feelings—dis- appointment. Instead, he took a deep breath. The fresh, crisp air relaxed him. Only then did he smell the earthy fragrance of moss and leaves. He felt the ancient trees surrounding him were a sanctuary from the outside world, offering solace. Unbeknownst to him, Chronos was connecting with a rhythm found only in nature. He even forgot where he was until Kairos spoke. “Standing here, do you feel at peace?” In a hushed voice, Chronos answered slowly, “At this moment, I do, but I haven’t felt this way for most of my life.” “Do you think this might be because of certain expectations you’ve had?” “Perhaps, but not all expectations are bad,” Chronos retorted, trying to avoid the question. “Of course not. But for a moment, I want you to suspend all judgment about your life or whether certain expectations were justified. I want you to search deep in your heart to discover what you’ve been quietly wishing for.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   88 “Wishing for?” “I want you to see how your life has been guided by expectations, by how you envisioned your life to be in order to be you. In order to be happy. In order to gain approval.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 89 Kairospaused when he noticed Chronos looking agitated. “It’s hard to let go of certain expectations,” Kairos said slowly, “when you’ve spent so much time daydreaming about how satisfied or happy you’ll be once they’re fulfilled.” The pessimistic side of Chronos was unwilling to continue the conversa- tion. “Think back to when you were young,” Kairos said, “and consider the ex- pectations some people had for you, like what you should do with your life.” Chronos realized this was something he hadn’t thought about in a long time. “When people close to you have dreams for you, they’re essentially telling you how to spend your time. This may include where you should go to school, where you should live, or who you should marry. . . . All this pressure creates anxiety because you worry about disappointing others. It also confuses you about what to do with your life, as if what you do for a living is the only thing that matters.” Kairos paused again before continuing. “When you think back to people who gave you advice, do you remember how they lived?” “What do you mean?” “They believed they knew what was best for you. But do you remember if they were happy?” “I don’t recall. Why?” “Well, if they weren’t happy or loved by others, perhaps they weren’t in a position to give life advice. Don’t you think?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 90 “Maybe they had good intentions and didn’t want me to be unhappy like them.” “Maybe. But ask yourself: Why was it so important for them that you listen to their advice and meet their expectations? Is it possible their intentions were misguided or that they had a skewed understanding of happiness?” “I never thought about it that way,” Chronos said. “If someone offers you advice, it’s good to ask: Why does this person’s opin- ion matter so much? Or is it because I always want to please others?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  91 Chronoswasn’t sure why Kairos was sharing all this. At his age, people didn’t offer counsel. “I think,” Chronos said, “that when you reach a certain age, you become so set in your ways that it’s nearly impossible to think differently.” “Well, imagine,” Kairos replied, “you’re reading a book only because some- one recommended it. By the middle, you feel disappointed because it’s not meeting your expectations.” The word ‘middle’ triggered a memory in Chronos. He recalled how mid- life hit him like a brick. To his dismay, he had to accept that his life would never turn out the way he hoped. Soon after, he entered a deep depression. On the days he could get out of bed, he took long walks. To his surprise, he began to observe young peo- ple in ways he never had before. Watching them enjoy life starkly reminded him of how he let time slip away. When he was young, he believed he had all the time in the world, but now he realized this view influenced how he spent his time. This thought had evoked a nostalgic sadness in him, but also sparked envy. While observing young people, it struck him for the first time that while his life was waning, theirs was just beginning. Chronos’ mind drifted back to when he first noticed wrinkles on his face. It reminded him of being in his twenties and feeling sympathy for older people, like those in their fifties—or worse, their eighties. He couldn’t imagine being old as he looked at older people with scorn. Now, young people looked at him with the same disdain, relieved not to be old. When we’re young, he thought, we seem to live in denial that we will be- come old and wrinkled to the point we no longer look like we once did. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   92 Chronosfelt increasingly uncomfortable with the conversation. Yet an- other part of him wanted to understand how unmet expectations had contrib- uted to his midlife crisis. “At midlife,” he said, “I blamed the world and everyone around me for my unhappiness.” “I would like to suggest something, Chronos. What if you knew these feel- ings are part of the human condition?” “How would that have helped?” “Your life’s story is not solely your own. Every human struggles with the same emotions you’ve just expressed. In fact, over a thousand years ago, the Stoic philosopher Seneca wrote about this very phenomenon in his book The Shortness of Life. He stated: ‘Why do we complain about time? Life, if you know how to use it, is long. Consider how one person is possessed by insatiable ambition, another by tire- some devotion to useless tasks; one seeks escape through alcohol, another is paralyzed by laziness; another goes to great lengths for status; some are tor- mented by their enjoyment of conflict; others are worn out by servitude to em- ployers who offer no real rewards; many are busy pursuing others’ fortunes; others follow no fixed aim, hoping to feel less dissatisfied while being mired in indecisiveness about ever-changing plans; and some have no fixed principle to direct their course.’ Chronos said nothing. He was stunned. “How,” he wondered, “could this have been written so long ago, yet peo- ple’s expectations about happiness remain unchanged?” He then pondered what Seneca meant by “no fixed principle.” “Could there be such a principle?” he asked himself. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 93 While they walked, Kairos discussed how peace, joy, and a good night’s sleep relate to expectations. “What sort of expectations?” Chronos asked. “It could be any expectation: expectations for yourself, expectations people have for you, expectations that life owes you something and that life should be fair, or the expectation that by achieving success, you will finally feel satisfied and be happier.” “Are you talking about expectations in relation to Seneca’s question: ‘Why do we complain about time?’” “Yes. If you believe you lack time, this perceived lack explains your unhap- piness.” “I don’t follow.” “People think that if they had more time, they would be happier.” Chronos contemplated this and asked Kairos what he meant by needing more time to be happier. “Consider how you felt when your life plans didn’t materialize as you ex- pected.” “Strange,” said Chronos. “What is?” “I don’t think I ever connected well-being with time. This makes me reflect on the difference between happiness and peace.” “This is a crucial distinction,” Kairos said. “Happiness, unlike peace, is something you chase. Happiness requires time.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   94 “But only,” Chronos added, “if you equate happiness with success and suc- cess with status?” “Exactly. If you spend all your time trying to get ahead or pursuing things to feel better, you'll always feel like you never have enough time.” “Because you believe you need to keep doing things?” “Yes. Some people live their entire lives in a suspended state, as if they are waiting for their lives to begin.” “I understand. I remember a time when I was driven to prove myself to my father. But now the idea of ‘proving’ myself makes no sense. I must have be- lieved that by succeeding or winning, I would be more loved—not just by him, but by everyone. I wonder if I was seeking something beyond love.” Kairos held back his response, seeing that Chronos was deep in thought. He wanted Chronos to recognize what else motivates people beyond love. “Being successful by proving yourself,” Kairos said, “is not true success if it leaves you feeling as lonely and disconnected as before.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 95 “If you value inner peace,” Kairos continued, “you don’t have to wait for the future. This also means that feeling good about yourself does not depend on what others think of you.” This made Chronos think about how competitive life is. He rephrased Kairos’ words: “If I cannot be at peace now—independent of success or finding the ideal mate—then I will always look to the future or rely on someone to ease my pain and make me happy.” Kairos nodded. “Once you accept that there is nothing you can do to find peace, you become free from endless striving.” “And it makes you less busy,” Chronos added. “I can see how this perspec- tive would cause life to pass more slowly.” “Precisely.” Chronos quietly wondered if this would make people passive and diminish their desire to achieve great things. Kairos turned to him. “Sometimes happiness can be bought, but not peace and certainly not love. We will discuss this more later because it all ties back to metamorphosis.” Chronos felt nostalgia wash over him. He pondered how his life might have been different if someone had shared these insights with him when he was younger. As he thought about this, he realized that his pride would have likely dis- missed what Kairos said as a platitude. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 96 Afterstrolling silently along the sun-dappled trail and listening to the mel- odies of the forest, they reached a fork. “Where does the right fork go?” enquired Chronos. Kairos hesitated. “To my village,” he replied. “We will take the left fork.” Chronos felt disappointed but remained hopeful he would see his village eventually. As Kairos veered left, he explained that the path would lead them to a cer- emonial site overlooking the forest, first used by the ancient Druids. “On our way, I want to share something with you about an old and myste- rious piece of artwork. It’s unique because if you sit quietly and long enough, it speaks to you, revealing things about yourself you didn’t know.” “How is that even possible?” Chronos asked in disbelief. "We'll talk more about this soon." “Can you at least tell me who made it?” “Nobody knows for sure, but that doesn’t matter right now.” “Of course it does!” “Not always. Say, for example, you have an exquisite meal at a restaurant. Do you have to know who made it or how it was made to enjoy it?” “I suppose not.” “Well, this artwork is similar. It must be experienced . . . without interpre- tation. Some people say they’ve received a gift when they see it, just as love is given freely.” “Are you talking about beauty?" The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   97 “No, not quite. Although its beauty—as beauty does—soothes life’s miser- ies. What I mean is that its beauty conveys a message known as the great irony of life.” “And that is?” “What unites humans will eventually divide them.” “I don’t understand.” “You will soon enough.” Despite this all sounding very cryptic, Chronos felt that Kairos was the fa- ther he wished he had—someone who passes down knowledge and wisdom. He felt relieved to have listened to his intuition by returning to the forest of Brocé- liande. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 98 Withhis hands clasped behind his back, Kairos told Chronos that art histo- rians have debated this artwork for centuries. “They cannot agree on how it came to be,” he explained, “or what inspired the artist to make it. Despite various opinions, it continues to capture the imag- ination of all the great poets and philosophers. For me, its beauty has a silent rhythm." “So you’ve seen it?” Chronos asked, still marveling at how a piece of art- work could be so evocative. “Oh yes! It’s been exhibited everywhere. In fact, it was stolen once and quickly returned. The thief realized that value and beauty cannot be contained or possessed. I am reminded of a Spanish troubadour poet who composed a poem soon after seeing it for the first time. He titled it The Spiral of Change. Would you like to hear it? “I would.” Without change There are no stars to see No waves to watch No leaves of red Or moonlit nights Without change There can be no timing No rhythm No dance Or verse Yet time changes everything It brings death Death brings decay And decay Brings grief The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  99 But without change Love cannot grow Nothing transforms Not even beauty Without change No expansion Or contraction The certainty of uncertainty Brings despair And despair Brings empty loneliness To embrace the ephemeral Within the peripheral Is the Spiral Way Of transformation The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 100 Chronos replayed the few galleries he had visited, feeling embarrassed that he didn’t know the artwork Kairos referred to. “There is something else unusual about this artwork.” “What’s that?” “If you look at it long enough, it mirrors what everyone feels.” “That can’t be true,” Chronos said, exasperated. “No artwork can do that.” “Somehow, it elevates your senses so you feel the entire range of human emotions oscillating within you. From joy to anger, love to hate, laughter to grief, recognition to rejection, fulfillment to disappointment.” For some reason, Chronos found the word oscillation interesting. “Many believe this artwork is unfinished. But that could be said of all beauty, including a human life. Beauty entices and seizes you. It opens you up to another realm of existence.” Chronos nodded in agreement. “Beauty may not offer answers,” Kairos added, “but it expands the imagi- nation and reminds you of the peace you long for, waiting to be discovered.” As the path narrowed, Chronos walked behind Kairos. “What fascinates philosophers about this artwork is its value. Not its mon- etary value, since it is priceless, but the fact that it cannot be duplicated.” “I don’t understand. How can it be priceless?” Chronos asked. “A more important question is: Does it have value in itself, or does it only have value because people give it value, thereby imbuing it with a sense of im- portance? Do you see the difference?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  101 “Yes. You’re saying this artwork has value regardless of whether people praise it. So, calling it famous does not increase its value.” “Precisely. This is why philosophers make a distinction between aesthetic value and axiological value.” “I know the word aesthetic, but not the other,” Chronos said, still wonder- ing why Kairos was telling him about this artwork. “Axiology is a branch of philosophy that deals with value and goodness.” “Are you saying this artwork possesses goodness?” “Yes! It has quality.” Chronos took a deep breath, exhausted from the conversation, and didn’t notice how the path became steeper. As they walked, he doubted he would ever see this artwork before he died. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 102 Chronoscould not grasp the connection between goodness, beauty, and quality in relation to a piece of artwork. Frustrated, he stopped walking. Kairos turned to look into Chronos' eyes as if peering through a keyhole. “No matter what anyone says, this artwork can never lose its inherent value. Its value does not depend on the opinion of others.” Chronos said nothing. He found this fascinating. It seemed he had spent most of his life trying to prove himself. Kairos gestured to keep walking. “We are almost there,” he said. “You’ll be amazed at what you’ll see at the top.” After catching his breath, Kairos continued, “Those fortunate enough to see it a second or third time will tell you the same thing. It appears different each time.” “That’s impossible!” “Like wine, it matures with age. In antiquity, it was called THE META- MORPHOSIS.” Chronos walked with his head down, pondering why he had never heard of it before. He then considered whether this had something to do with Ovid, the Ro- man poet, who wrote a poem by the same name. Chronos was so lost in thought that he didn’t realize they had reached the top. When he looked up, he was amazed. They were higher than the trees, and for a moment, he felt entranced watching them sway rhythmically. In a playful tone, Kairos asked Chronos if he would like to see the artwork now. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  103 “What are you talking about? The artwork is here? On this vista?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 104 Withoutwarning something flew inches above their heads—a tawny owl. It perched on a twisted spiral branch just above them. Kairos smiled; he under- stood the omen. He walked slowly toward the cliff’s edge and calmly called out, “C-H-R-O- N-O-S.” Chronos turned to face his companion and replied sheepishly, “Yes.” “It is YOU. You are the art I speak of—a living mosaic like everyone else.” Chronos felt agitated. “Are you saying this painting doesn’t exist?” he asked in frustration. “Not exactly,” Kairos responded. “Every person resembles a piece of art- work while also being the artist, participating in their own creation.” Chronos listened, his brow furrowed. “Unfortunately,” Kairos added, “during their own creation process, many humans forget they are already beautiful and depend on others for validation. They feel incomplete and struggle to feel whole. They are vibrant but don’t see it. They have value but don’t feel it. They are dejected and wait for acknowl- edgment.” For a moment, Chronos stopped resisting. He wanted to trust Kairos de- spite his disappointment. “You see, some artists can only feel good about themselves if others love their creation. They quickly feel rejected when their artwork is not exhibited, forgetting they have no control over how it will be received.” “I understand, but what does this have to do with me?” “The uncertainty the artist feels is similar to what everyone experiences at some point in their life. It explains why some feel compelled to control every The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  105 situation and why others attempt to control those around them. It also explains why people put conditions on love.” Chronos said nothing; he still wasn’t sure what to make of this. Kairos continued, explaining that people become their own worst critics, believing they are never good enough. "This is why,” he said, “some seek validation through affirmation. They stop painting for themselves and instead paint for recognition.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   106 Withhis eyes closed, a strange image flashed before Chronos: he saw him- self suspended on a wall like a crucifix. Everyone who walked by could see his emotional pain. He suffered alone, nailed down by insecurities. He became lost in this image until Kairos' voice jolted him back to reality. "Unlike trust, value cannot be earned," he heard Kairos say. "What I hope you see, Chronos, is that no one can be happy if they seek their value outsi de themselves by putting themselves on display.” Chronos found it odd that Kairos would say this given the vision he just had of himself. “No one can be at peace or free,” Kairos continued, “when others easily influence their feelings. At some point, you allowed others to determine your self-worth. You let them destroy your dreams. You became enslaved by insecu- rities. Interestingly, it is insecurity that stops many artists from exhibiting, even though it is insecurity that makes their work so compelling.” “How so?” “Because these artists do not create to win a prize or feel validated. For reasons beyond themselves, they create with authenticity. This is why their work is so compelling and infectious. You see, they don’t create to be great; they create for joy.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   107 Kairos paused before continuing, needing to gauge if Chronos was still receptive. “They create,” he added, “in the spirit of what the ancient Greeks called areté—the pursuit of excellence. That is their strength, their dynamism.” Knowing Chronos was not from his Tradition, Kairos realized the conver- sation might be overwhelming. He understood that for Chronos, excellence meant only one thing: success. “There are people who pretend to be someone they are not in hopes of being recognized and respected. But for others, that is not enough. They want to be adored and envied.” Looking perplexed, Chronos wondered if this behavior stemmed from early childhood. “When I look back,” he said, “I sometimes felt like an inconvenience to my parents. It was a continuous game of hide and seek—wanting to be found yet feeling invisible.” Kairos was deeply saddened to hear this. “Because this is so common world- wide, our community makes a concerted effort to provide young people with everything they need to become good parents.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 108 “What I want you to consider,” Kairos said, “is that if such artists found themselves on a deserted island, they would not create.” “Why not?” “Because no one would be there to praise them. Sometimes, people do what they do because they cannot be in their doing—their being comes from their doing, not the other way around.” “What do you mean by being?” Chronos asked. “From what you've told me, it seems you've spent most of your life doing things in hopes of finding meaning in happiness." Chronos repeated the last phrase in his mind. He didn't believe he con- sciously sought meaning in happiness. But the more he thought about it, the less clear it became. "As I said, you searched for value outside yourself, which is why you felt you had to prove yourself or seek affirmation.” “You might be right,” Chronos responded quietly, feeling the weight of the conversation grow. “I think this could be one reason you lost track of time, and as a result, lost track of yourself. You hoped validation and approval would give you something you lacked.” At that moment, Kairos stopped speaking. He looked at Chronos with love and compassion, wanting to ensure that Chronos did not feel judged. Chronos said nothing, trying to figure out what he had lacked. “What I’m trying to say, Chronos, is that time slipped through your fingers while you pursued what you thought was important. In the end, it only left you feeling emptier.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 109 “Pursuing what?” “Happiness.” “That makes no sense! There is no connection between happiness and time.” “Over the course of your life, think about how you used your time pursuing happiness by doing things to feel better . . . or, conversely, using your time to escape your unhappiness.” Chronos looked bewildered. Part of him did not want to hear this. “Did I really waste my time pursuing the wrong things in life?” he won- dered, uncertain if he wanted to know the answer. “But how can happiness be the problem?” This question reminded him of his conversation with the woman in the park a month earlier, before returning to the forest of Brocéliande. She said to him, “Life can be whatever you want it to be, but it will never be what you think it needs to be when your identity or self-worth must be de- fined by external measures like success.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   110 Chronostold Kairos he felt his life resembled a scattered jigsaw puzzle. “What do you mean?” asked Kairos. “It felt fragmented, even though I spent so much time trying to piece myself together. But now that I’ve said that, maybe ‘together’ isn’t the right word.” Chronos paused. “Go on,” Kairos urged. “I suppose I hoped that by the time I reached forty or fifty, I would have achieved my goals and felt whole. Instead, I discovered missing pieces.” “Missing pieces?” “In the same way as nearly completing a complicated puzzle only to dis- cover that you're missing pieces. I convinced myself I would never have a com- plete picture of myself.” Kairos was about to ask a question until he noticed Chronos looking for- lorn, staring out at the landscape. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 111 Aftercollecting his thoughts, he asked Kairos if he named his metaphorical artwork THE METAMORPHOSIS because of Ovid’s poem. “Yes, partially. I’m surprised you’ve heard of Ovid. He is mostly forgotten despite being a brilliant poet; unfortunately, his desire for fame became his only muse. Some believe this is why his poem Metamorphoses was never com- pleted.” “What is metamorphosis?” Chronos asked. “I thought I understood its meaning, but I don’t see how it applies to humans.” “Metamorphosis is a seed growing out of darkness. If the seed is not packed too tightly, its roots will stretch deep to find nourishment and strength. Human metamorphosis is similar, provided there is room to grow and the spirit is properly nourished.” Kairos looked away, and Chronos followed his gaze to a vibrant Monarch butterfly resting on a rotting tree trunk. Chronos stared at it with childlike wonder, marveling at its deep orange wings adorned with black symmetrical veins. Kairos moved gingerly to approach the butterfly. “Do you see those white spots in the center?” “Yes.” “They indicate this one is male. Females don’t have those spots on their hind wings.” “I didn’t know that. It’s fascinating how color can signify the gender of a species.” “Indeed. As you know, these creatures undergo a series of marvelous trans- formations we call metamorphosis—from egg to caterpillar to pupa and finally The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   112 into a colorful butterfly after a period of cocooning. Its raison d’être—its pur- pose—is to metamorphosize. However, it cannot do this if it clings to being a caterpillar; otherwise, it will never learn to fly. Likewise, if it focuses only on the future—on being a butterfly—it would never appreciate being a caterpillar or accept the limitations of each stage of its metamorphosis. You see, a butter- fly’s life cycle is a lifelong process of being, shedding, becoming, and then being again; of course, it does not do this consciously, which is why it’s different for humans. They have a choice.” “What choice?” “The choice to either metathesize or metamorphosize, to degenerate or re- generate. The former is chaotic and arrhythmic; it requires no effort and leads to loneliness. The latter is a struggle fraught with risks of disappointment; how- ever, in hindsight, it is always worth it because you will never ask what if.” A part of Chronos wasn’t convinced that metamorphosis applied to hu- mans. He told Kairos, “Butterflies do not purposely inflict emotional or physical pain on other butterflies, or worse, derive satisfaction from hurting other crea- tures.” “No, they don’t,” Kairos replied ruefully. “But then again, caterpillars don’t need heartache to be reminded to metamorphosize.” “I suppose that’s true,” Chronos sighed. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 113 “Setbackscan be a catalyst for recharting your life,” Kairos said. Chronos sighed. “Everyone knows the agony that comes from profound disappointment.” A part of Chronos was relieved to hear Kairos say that. “After decades pass, however, hindsight reveals something you could not or would not admit. The setback you experienced became transformative. It awakened something in you and forced you to see your life in a completely dif- ferent way.” Chronos immediately thought about when his first wife divorced him. It gutted him. When he convinced himself he would never recover, he wanted to die. “Sometimes when life shakes you hard enough,” Kairos said, “you have two choices: you can either wither or expand. But expanding means shedding what- ever holds you back from metamorphosizing. This could be a dysfunctional re- lationship, unrequited love, the end of a dream, job loss, addiction, or a painful childhood experience.” Chronos laughed wryly while motioning with his index finger, “Check, check, check, and check!” Kairos chuckled. “Time is a strange thing when you can look back at an awful time and laugh about it.” Chronos returned his gaze and asked him to continue. “What I was about to say is that enduring painful times is part of the human experience. The key, however, is knowing that pain can be sublimated. This gives you the strength to pull through anything.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  114 Chronos was about to ask what he meant by sublimate, but he noticed Kairos looking at something. He followed his gaze to another butterfly, but this time a Swallowtail butterfly resting on a fern. “Watching the metamorphosis of these creatures is inspiring. To see it in a human . . . well, that is truly magical.” “That’s easy to say,” Chronos interjected, “when you’re not feeling over- whelmed and everything seems hopeless.” “I never said it was easy,” Kairos responded quickly. “What I mean is that the struggle is always worth it if you can make peace with time.” Chronos wasn’t convinced. He didn’t believe time was the problem. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 115 “Have you ever heard musicians riff?” asked Kairos. “Riff?” “Yes. Improvise.” “Of course. But how does this relate to what we’re discussing?” “Feeling overwhelmed mostly comes from being out of tune with yourself. It’s a temporary loss of inner harmony.” Chronos kept his eyes fixed on the butterfly as Kairos spoke. “Riffing is a wild and beautiful act of spontaneity that expands boundaries. Yet no matter how skilled a musician you are, you cannot riff if your instrument is out of tune.” “I’ve never thought of disharmony in relation to feeling overwhelmed or depressed.” “We all have a melody to play,” Kairos said gracefully. “And because for most of your life you didn’t know this, much of what you did was just bad tim- ing.” “I see. Harmony is impossible without timing.” Kairos nodded. “Without awareness of timing, you may have missed key opportunities in your life—moments that could have enhanced your life just like those times you followed your gut feeling.” “Are you saying everyone has their own inner harmony, but not everyone can hear or feel it?” Kairos paused, noticing a nostalgic glaze in Chronos’ eyes. “What I’m saying is that to access the harmony within, you must keep tun- ing yourself.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  116 “How do I know when I’m out of tune?” “Observe your relationships and notice when they feel off. But you won't be able to do this if your busyness keeps you distracted.” “I don’t know,” Chronos said, feeling defeated. “I guess I just don’t see how metamorphosis can change anything or ease my pain.” “You’re right, Chronos. It’s not obvious, but don’t despair. I promise you’ll see everything clearly. All you need is patience and fortitude.” Chronos took a deep breath while looking at the beauty before him. He never understood why patience was always difficult for him. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   117 Theyboth stepped back from the cliff’s edge to sit on a log. It occurred to Chronos how much he enjoyed being high up and seeing everything from a different perspective. He wondered if gaining a higher per- spective was one of the purposes of metamorphosis. “You know, few outside my Tradition,” Kairos explained, “are taught about human metamorphosis, and even if they are aware of it, something always stops them from embracing it.” Chronos tried to imagine what that could be. “Many people don’t want life to be a mysterious labyrinth.” “You mean people want certainty?” “Yes. Think again about being a musician. If your instrument is out of tune, it doesn’t matter how passionate you are. A human is similar. When you find your rhythm, time flows at a different pace—a pace not determined by all the things you have to do or don’t do.” “This reminds me of when you talked about improvisation and how you don’t know where it will lead. What’s important is to embrace the uncertainty as a means of expression.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 118 Kairosglanced at Chronos, who was gazing at the horizon. “Are you familiar with the treble clef symbol?” asked Kairos. “I don’t think so,” replied Chronos. Kairos picked up a stick and drew it in the ground. “Yes, of course. I forgot the name. It's placed at the beginning of what I believe is called the stave.” “You might also recognize this symbol,” Kairos said as he drew it next to the clef. “I've seen it, but I don’t know what it’s called.” “Dal Segno. Before we discuss the spiral treble clef, I want to talk about the Dal Segno. It means to return to the sign that marks the beginning.” Kairos noticed Chronos was only half-listening. “What is it?” he asked. “I’m thinking about certainty. I didn’t realize how much I depended on it for comfort. It grounded me.” “You mean it provides security?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   119 “Yes!” Kairos paused to consider how to proceed. “If certainty is what you need,” he finally said, “then there is one thing you can always be certain of.” “And that is?” “Your future.” “My future?” Chronos said, bemused. “This is precisely the one thing I am most uncertain of!” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  120 “It’s true,” Kairos explained, “your future will always be uncertain. But no- tice how certain you are of this.” Chronos looked confused. “You might think this is a play on words, but it’s not. In my Tradition, it’s an important teaching. Your metamorphosis is only possible when you make peace with life’s uncertainties.” “It’s not easy,” Chronos exclaimed. “Why does life have to be so difficult?” “If you expect life to be easy, you will never enjoy it.” Chronos repeated this in his head. “Did it ever occur to you,” Kairos continued, “how much time you spend shaping life by living each day for an imagined future that you hope will one day make you happy, content, or fulfilled?” “It seems obvious now in hindsight.” “You see, when you stop resisting uncertainty,” Kairos explained, “you let go of the angst that comes from impermanence. And when this happens, you discover how much more time you really have.” Chronos was trying to follow Kairos but wasn’t sure where this was leading. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 121 “What I mean,” Kairos continued, “is that once you place less importance on certainty, you will depend less on hope—hope that comes from expectations of the future. And then you will see that your need for certainty was the very thing that held you back.” Kairos noticed that Chronos wanted to speak but didn’t give him a chance. “Make the choice,” he said. Chronos felt his head spinning again. “What choice?” he asked. “The choice to choose. You can choose to make peace with the unknown— or—you can choose to allow life’s uncertainties to rob you of joy. The effort is the same.” “It’s not that simple!” “Are you sure? It’s a choice like any other, except it’s made daily. It means choosing an open future—one that may contradict your hopes and desires. It means saying: I am certain of my uncertain future, and I choose to make peace with it.” There was silence. Chronos didn’t know what to think; instead, he sat in disbelief as if someone had slapped him. “Is it possible,” he asked himself, “that my desire for control and need for certainty have held me back? Did my desire for security prevent me from evolv- ing? Did I remain the same person for most of my life?” Kairos waited for him to decide, watching Chronos wrestle with the choice. A few minutes later, Chronos finally said, “Alright. I made the choice . . . except now I feel . . .” “What?” Kairos asked. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   122 “I don’t know exactly. It’s strange. I have done nothing except make a choice. And yet, I feel a sense of . . . well, for lack of a better word, I feel —relief . . . but also fear.” "This is because you now realize how much you tried to control everything, and giving up that control means accepting uncertainty. That’s where the fear comes from." “I suppose you’re right.” “Whatever name you give this new feeling, it’s essential that it doesn’t re- main just an idea in your head. For insights to truly be insightful, they must be actualized or, as we say in my Tradition, insights must be appropriated to be insightful.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 123 WhenKairos finished speaking, he stood and walked toward another part of the V-shaped cliff. Chronos watched a strong wind whip his worn cloak. His palms sweated as Kairos approached the edge. When Kairos reached the brink, he stood motionless. After a few minutes, he cautiously turned around. As he did, the wind intensified and the clouds moved with increasing speed. Kairos glanced at Chronos and said, Dyw dy nerth, Ag yn nerth Dioddef; A dioddef dros y Gwir, Ag yn y Gwir pob Goleuni; Ag yngoleuni pob Gwynfyd, Ag yngwynfyd Cariad, Ag ynghariad Dyw, Ag yn Nuw pob Daioni. When he finished, an eerie silence hovered over the forest like fog. Chronos was confused about what had just happened. As Kairos approached, Chronos stood to greet him and asked if he was speaking Welsh. “Yes. What I recited was an ancient Druid prayer called the Gorsedd. It was said for your protection.” Feeling disoriented, Chronos didn’t think to ask why he needed protection, and Kairos didn’t want to reveal the trials awaiting him beyond the archway. “Can you translate what you said?” Chronos asked. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  124 “I can, but not its meaning, since you’re not part of the Tradition I come from: Artificer, impart Thy strength; And in strength, power to suffer; And to suffer for the truth; And in the truth, all light; And in light, gwynvyd; And in gwynfyd, love; And in love, the love for all creation; And in the Artificer, all goodness. After he finished, he looked at Chronos, who appeared pale. “What is it?” he asked. “That’s the word!” “What word?” “Gwynvyd. That’s the word I heard when the mouflon looked at me.” “That can’t be. Are you sure?” “I am. How do you spell it?” “G-w-y-n-v-y-d.” “What does it mean?” asked Chronos. Kairos shook his head in disbelief. “Come, let’s sit at the cliff’s edge.” Chronos felt butterflies in his stomach. He was afraid of heights. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   125 Asthey approached the edge, Chronos wiped the sweat from his palms onto his pants. Fear made him forget the word gwynvyd. When they were about eight feet from the edge, an eagle let out a high- pitched screech, further unnerving Chronos. Noticing him wobble, Kairos quickly grabbed his arm. “Sit down,” he said. “We’ll shuffle the rest of the way.” With Kairos's help, Chronos sat down, and they slowly inched toward the edge. With their feet now dangling over the precipice, Kairos continued to hold his arm. “What you’re experiencing is called l’appel du vide.” “I’ve heard that. What does it mean?” “The call of the void. It describes a person’s unexplained desire to jump off a cliff.” Chronos didn’t respond. He was too scared to think. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   126 When they reached the edge, something strange happened. Chronos felt as if a veil had lifted. The sensation reminded him of someone whose eyesight deteriorates grad- ually but doesn’t notice until getting glasses. He wondered if this was how he had become spiritually blind. “It’s strange,” Chronos said. “Being up here makes me think of all the times I would stop to appreciate something beautiful, but I never lingered because I told myself I didn’t have time.” Chronos took a deep breath as he looked down. His fear returned. “Look at me,” Kairos said soothingly. “Now, continue with what you were saying.” “I would think about all the things I had to do. I’d tell myself, ‘Once every- thing is done, you can relax.’ But that never happened. There was always some- thing else to do.” Chronos turned his gaze from Kairos to the forest below. Slowly, his fear began to subside. And then for some reason he thought about the Gorsedd prayer. “I don’t believe I’ve ever heard the Supreme Being called the Artificer,” Chronos said, reluctant to admit he wavered on whether such a Being existed. He believed only weak people needed religion. “There is an ancient book known only by the name Liber XXIV philosopho- rum,” Kairos explained as he gently released Chronos’ arm. “Two passages from this book come to mind: ‘The Artificer is an infinite spiral whose center is eve- rywhere and whose circumference is nowhere. The Artificer is the only one for whom time is always present.’” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 127 Chronosremained silent, unsure how to interpret the statement, though it reminded him of a recurring dream. “In this dream,” he told Kairos, “my life experiences are compressed into a barrel floating down a fast-moving river. I see myself chasing the barrel along a forest path that runs parallel to the river. I have cuts all over my body because I can’t avoid the branches. In one dream, I discovered why I was running after the barrel: it was approaching a massive waterfall.” Chronos stopped speaking as if he had realized something. “What is it?” Kairos asked. “I’m not sure I can explain it, but at one point today, the barrel fell over the waterfall. For some reason, I feel at peace with it. Relieved, even.” “If identity,” Kairos mused, “is something you create from your limited life experiences, then maybe it was your identity that went over the waterfall.” “I think you’re right.” “And you may also feel peace knowing what follows a waterfall?” “Calm water?” “Yes. When the rushing sound of the waterfall fades, there is serene si- lence.” “Maybe this is why I remembered my dream from the quote you shared.” “Interesting,” Kairos said. “Go on.” “When I used to rush, I was never fully present. I felt split, became more forgetful, and was a worse listener. I never felt grounded.” Chronos paused to gaze at the distant horizon. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   128 “I don’t know if this makes sense, but I couldn’t locate myself. Everything I did was just a way to keep me afloat, even though I could hear the distant waterfall ahead.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   129 Chronos turned to Kairos with appreciation, thanking him for sharing wisdom from his Tradition, even though he was still grappling with understand- ing the Way. Kairos smiled. “We all walk the same path, my friend.” Chronos smiled too. As they enjoyed the view from the cliff, they felt no need to talk. After a while, Chronos expressed his fatigue from the conversation. “Would it be okay,” he asked, “if we leave the cliff now? I need a nap.” “Good idea!” Kairos replied with a chuckle. “I need one too. I usually take afternoon naps.” Kairos helped Chronos step back from the cliff. As they walked away, Kairos asked Chronos if he noticed how fear made him hyper-focused. "What do you mean?" "Your concerns vanish. Not even past disappointments bother you.” Chronos nodded, wondering if love could have the same effect. “What you experienced,” Kairos added, “is a type of realignment. I’ll share more about this later. My Tradition calls it entrainment. This is when your sense of self is synchronized with your consciousness.” Chronos didn’t understand but was too tired to process anything. They quickly found a comfortable spot to settle down and soon fell fast asleep. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   130 Chronos woke up an hour later feeling disoriented. He looked over at Kairos, but he was gone. For a moment, he thought he had dreamt everything. Chronos stood up slowly and stretched his stiff body. He called out Kairos’ name. No response, except for the hoot of an owl. He wondered again if his time with Kairos had been a dream. This thought made him anxious. If it had been, then it was the most vivid dream he had ever had. Chronos decided to walk around to get his bearings, but still no sign of Kairos. “It’s not possible that I dreamt everything!” he said aloud, trying to con- vince himself otherwise. He began to perspire, unsure how to get back to the Archway. As he nervously looked around, a strange thought crossed his mind. “If I dreamt everything, I could still return home with all the insights I’ve gained. But wouldn’t that mean all the wisdom I acquired was already in my head?” This caused Chronos to consider something he had never thought of before. “Sometimes, when I recall a memory from a dream, it is as vivid as recalling an actual memory. There is no difference. How can I tell them apart?” Despite finding this fascinating, Chronos did not want his experience with Kairos to be a dream. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   131 Withevery passing minute of not finding him, Chronos felt increasingly dis- couraged. He was about to sit down when he smelled something familiar. It seemed to come from a thicket of bushes ahead. He walked over and, like a deer, slowly leaned forward to see what was on the other side. Chronos gasped. With overwhelming relief, he spotted Kairos sitting on a large boulder in the distance, smoking his pipe. As he approached, Kairos asked how his nap was. Chronos said nothing. “What’s wrong? You look like you saw a ghost.” “When I couldn’t find you, I thought my time with you was just a dream.” Kairos laughed. “Do you want me to pinch you?” Chronos shook his head, embarrassed but relieved. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 132 Kairoschanged the subject. “You didn’t tell me about your nap. Do you feel rested?” “No, not really.” “I suppose that’s not surprising,” Kairos said. “We’ve covered so much. Your mind is full, and your spirit is strained from holding onto everything.” “I suppose,” Chronos muttered. “This is part of metamorphosis. When you sleep, your subconscious filters out spiritual toxins.” As Chronos looked around, he noticed a path leading south. He told Kairos he wasn’t ready to return to the archway. “Could we continue our walk?” he asked. Kairos nodded and put out his pipe. A comfortable silence hung between them as they walked, broken only by the whisper of the wind in the trees, until Chronos finally spoke. “I had a strange dream. I don’t remember most of it, except that I was al- ways waiting for someone to take me somewhere. I remember feeling increas- ingly impatient and irritable. What do you think this means?” “Your dream reflects a common phenomenon,” Kairos responded. “People wait because they desire.” “Desire what?” Kairos smirked. “What they don’t have, of course.” “And what do you think I lack?” “I don’t know. You tell me.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   133 Chronos wasn’t pleased with the conversation. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 134 Inthat instant, Chronos finally remembered. He recalled the last thing Kairos said to him as a boy just before they parted. He had searched for the question like a lost treasure. Kairos had instructed him to find the true reason grown-ups spend their time being busy—only then, he said, would he discover the consequence of a busy life: loneliness. Chronos stopped walking. Ashamed, he turned to face Kairos. “I chose to be busy, didn’t I? But why?” Kairos looked at him and listened. Chronos walked slower. “I think my busyness was a distraction.” “From what?” Kairos asked rhetorically. “I don’t know exactly. Maybe anxiety. Maybe fear of depression. Or just feeling alone. Whatever the reason, it must have stemmed from a pervasive sense of dissatisfaction.” Kairos walked closer to Chronos. “I think I spent my life waiting. Waiting for storms to pass. Waiting to make more money. Waiting to be happy, as if happiness is supposed to arrive like a gift.” Chronos paused before continuing. “I spent my life searching for some- thing. Something to make me feel better. Or, rather, something to take away, as you put it, my restless disquietude.” Chronos paused again, lost in thought. “So, maybe,” Kairos said, “this is another message from your recurring dream that you told me about.” “What message is that?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   135 “You rely on your identity to satisfy you.” Chronos was stunned by the revelation. This had never occurred to him. “I suppose,” he said, “the vicissitudes of life weighed on me more than I thought. I used my time to escape myself and life’s uncertainties. Or perhaps, to prove myself to others.” “Or prove something to yourself?” Kairos added. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 136 Feeling weak, Chronos sat on a large stump. “I wonder if this explains why time can feel like a burden?” With his hands over his head, Chronos repeated in a hushed voice, “I chose to be busy. Why didn’t I see this before?” “Because you weren’t aware of why you kept yourself busy. When you’re busy, there is no space. No room for peace.” “It is strange,” said Chronos. “What is?” “What you just said seems so obvious now that it feels more like a platitude than an epiphany.” Chronos felt Kairos’ hand on his shoulder. “Insights are always obvious in hindsight,” he said gently. “You kept yourself unnaturally busy in both mind and deed. You rarely rested, even though this is what you thought you were doing when you slept too much or engaged in mindless activities. Unknowingly, you kept yourself busy to escape white noise.” “What’s that?” “The inherent restlessness in your soul. You hoped it would eventually sub- side. Instead, this put you in a state of waiting. This pervasive discontent fueled what my Tradition calls the anticipation of expectations.” “Meaning?” “Meaning you lived in a constant state of anticipation that the future would always be better. You believed all you needed was time. This created anxiety.” “Because there’s no certainty about the future?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  137 Kairos nodded. “You didn’t realize anxiety would make your life pass quickly.” With a blank stare, Chronos looked up at Kairos. “It was my search for hap- piness, wasn’t it?” Kairos sat next to Chronos. “It’s a paradox. Striving for happiness can make you unhappy. It’s like being infatuated with someone because you feel you need them to complete you, to make you happy.” Chronos smiled. “I experienced this in my twenties. I’d never felt more alive. I couldn’t stop thinking about her.” “But one day,” Kairos continued, “you discover this person isn’t who you thought she was. In that moment, you are set free from your infatuation. As one Stoic philosopher put it, ‘Everyone yearns for a happy life, yet no one knows what it comprises. From this stems the great difficulty in attaining it.’” “That is so true. I wish I had heard this earlier in my life.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 138 Kairos continued, “When you finally reach the place you hoped would make you happy and it doesn’t, you feel emasculated.” “What do you mean?” “Disappointment wears you down like unrequited love.” Chronos sighed. He knew all too well the feeling of being worn down by life. “What I’m suggesting is that when you abandon the pursuit of happiness, you are freed from waiting for the future. This is a beautiful thing when you consider what is gained.” “Gained?” Chronos repeated. “Freedom from time. Freedom from uncertainty about whether you will ever ‘find’ happiness. In other words, you finally stop striving for things that could never have made you happy in the first place. Happiness is not something you stumble upon.” Kairos paused before continuing. “This may sound strange, but happiness is something you grow into. It does not come through acquisition.” Chronos felt something snag in the back of his mind as if a spiritual thread had been pulled. At that moment, he had a vision. He saw himself standing on the edge of a cliff overlooking the Pacific, hold- ing a ball of yarn. Looking down, he could see the waves crashing violently against the base of the cliff, sending sprays of saltwater onto his face. The wind howled with such force that he leaned into it. While holding one end of the yarn with his thumb and index finger, he threw it over the edge. He watched it unravel as the wind took it. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  139 Chronos found the image disturbing. This is how he felt. He worried that by the time he returned home, there would be nothing left of his former self. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 140 Asthey descended the narrow path, the landscape changed dramatically. To Chronos, it felt like they had entered another country. The rocks were rugged and exposed, the trees stunted, and strangely, there were no flowers. Chronos stretched his neck to look up at the jagged cliffs. Everything around him mirrored his emotions. He shared his feelings with Kairos, who explained that his Tradition calls this the Paradox of Resistance. “It’s similar to the joy of falling in love while being gripped by fear.” “Fear?” “Yes. The fear of opening yourself up. The fear of rejection. The fear of being exposed because the persona you've created isn’t the real you. Instead of embracing this new love, fear creates distance without you even realizing it.” Chronos was only half-listening. He realized part of him resisted metamor- phosis. “Maybe it is fear,” he thought. “Maybe I’m too attached to who I think I am or who I’m supposed to be.” Not wanting to discuss this now, he redirected the conversation by asking if striving itself was the problem. “What do you mean?” asked Kairos. “Isn’t striving for metamorphosis just another means to another end, to reach some future state?” The question surprised Kairos, but he saw it as a positive sign. After all, only curious people ask questions, and only curious people are willing to explore themselves. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 141 “Throughoutour time together, we’ve discussed feelings of discour- agement and how this leads to demotivation. This stems from an inner voice that causes you to second-guess yourself.” In his younger years, Chronos thought he was the only one with this inner voice. “In my Tradition, we teach our young people about an ancient practice known as the Fifth Way. It’s called this because the practice involves repeating a five-word sentence.” “What’s the purpose of this practice?” “It’s something they can say whenever they feel discouraged. We hope they carry these words into adulthood: The words are: I am where I am.” “How is that helpful?” Chronos asked, thinking it sounded odd. “Consider learning to play chess. One day, you face a skilled player with thirty years of experience. Would it be reasonable to feel frustrated for losing so quickly?” “No, of course not.” “This is what it means to acknowledge—I am where I am. It means humbly accepting your limitations at this point in your journey.” “And how does one do that?” “By adjusting your expectations.” “Interesting. Go on.” “Expectations are often the source of daily frustration. This parallels meta- morphosis, but unlike chess, it's not about winning. It’s about the possibilities of being fully human, of transcending the human condition.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   142 For a moment, Chronos thought he understood, but then, like a passing breeze, it brushed by him. He wanted to ask Kairos what fully human meant, but Kairos continued. “I know this question may seem random,” he said, “but I want you to con- sider this: What do I need to forgive myself for? Or, who do I need to forgive to be free to metamorphosize?” “Why are you asking me this?” Chronos fretted. “Because I want you to reflect on what has kept you stuck over the years; what has prevented you from loving more fully without jealousy; from being more joyful without fearing it will end; from being more playful without wor- rying about what’s next? You see, forgiveness is easy to recognize when we ex- pect it from others, but less so from ourselves.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   143 Chronos’ cynical side lingered. It tried to control the conversation by stifling his curiosity. It knew only one narrative: he was broken, and nothing could change that unless he proved him- self to others. Then he heard Kairos say something that initially seemed trite. “Joy in relationships,” Kairos said, “is possible when both partners desire metamorphosis.” Chronos thought about the arguments he had with his two former spouses. Each argument drained the joy they once shared and typically ended the same way. He would accuse them of being emotional, controlling, overly reactive, manipulative, stubborn, moody, or defensive. In turn, they would accuse him of being insensitive, insecure, impatient, jealous, entitled, domineering, or a poor listener. Chronos would passionately deny these accusations just as his partners did. They lacked the spiritual maturity to recognize any truth in what was said. Instead, it was easier to blame the other person. They did not realize it was part of the human condition to seek external explanations for their hurt or un- happiness. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 144 “Sometimes,” he heard Kairos say, “anger stems from pride or inse- curity. Whatever the source, only humility can tame it. Think about when peo- ple express themselves when someone wrongs them. Recounting their story generates sympathy, making them feel heard and justified.” Chronos didn’t want to admit he had done this many times. “Most humans would rather vent than understand because being wrong is an affront to their identity. By venting, they feel better and feel no need to speak to the person who upset them. They either want to avoid the situation or don’t want to hear a different perspective.” “In the same way,” Chronos added, “it’s easier to be angry than to grieve, or to blame others than to admit one’s mistakes. But I don’t think we’re always aware we do this.” “That’s true, which is another reason we’ve been discussing metamorpho- sis. Feelings of resistance or making mistakes are not flaws; they are opportuni- ties to grow and break free from patterns that hinder relationships. Metamor- phosis is a shedding process. Yet this cannot happen when people only listen to those who already agree with them. In the end, this shrinks their consciousness.” At that moment, Kairos noticed regret in Chronos’ eyes. This concerned him. Regret, like a malignant tumor, if left untreated, will exhaust you but also drain your time. “How?” “It keeps you dwelling on the past.” Kairos gently placed his left hand on Chronos’ shoulder. “It’s natural to feel small and unworthy,” he said. “And it’s common to believe there is no hope for you—but never forget that such feelings are part of your metamorphosis. No human is born perfect.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   145 “That is certainly true,” Chronos sighed, wondering what perfection would even look like. “What you interpret as negative, whether it’s a painful experience or a bad day, we call a contraction period. They are certainly unpleasant, but they are part of your spiral journey through life, even when it doesn’t feel like it, espe- cially in the depths of despair.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  146 Theysoon came upon another outlook facing east. In the distance stood the Castle of Trécesson, barely visible through the wafting mist rising from a calm lake surrounding it. As Chronos admired the distant beauty, his racing thoughts began to settle. Standing side by side, still gazing east, Kairos spoke. “There are moments in life when the ugliness of the world seems to dissi- pate, breathing new life into you. You feel no need to accomplish anything . . . just to be you. Time slows. And so too does every pretense of how your life is supposed to be.” When Chronos heard this, his first thought was the word unworthy. Long ago, he had convinced himself that lasting peace or happiness was impossible for him. Beauty was something to look at, not something within him. “When beauty goes uninterpreted,” Kairos said, “peace infuses your spirit, moving you in unexpected ways, like when you fell in love. This shift creates newfound curiosity. It humbles you and allows you to believe that everything around you can align. This is called entrainment.” Chronos wasn’t sure what entrainment meant, but he hoped the beauty of the forest would help him transcend his pain and cleanse his soul. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   147 Asthey continued their way, the surrounding area grew increasingly deso- late. The thinning trees gave the landscape a stark, empty quality, sharply con- trasting with how he felt moments before. For some reason, he was beginning to feel lonely and cold. To distract himself, he asked Kairos to further explain the meaning of met- amorphosis. He thought he understood it, but now he wasn’t so sure. “When you listen to musicians improvise, it looks effortless, doesn’t it?” “It does.” “Yet you know it takes sacrifice to play with such grace. Now, suppose a seasoned musician learns another instrument. Having already mastered one, she understands the need to trust the process. By doing so, she won’t become easily discouraged, despite knowing it will take years to become a virtuoso.” Chronos wasn’t sure how this answered his question but suspected it re- lated to expectations. Unbeknownst to Chronos, Kairos had planted another seed in his subcon- scious. Soon, Chronos would come to appreciate the relationship between self- mastery and metamorphosis. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 148 “Faith,patience, and self-compassion,” Kairos said softly, “are essential to practicing the Way of metamorphosis.” “What do you mean by faith?” “Faith in the process. It's like the faith needed when learning a second lan- guage. Trusting the process cultivates patience, making daily struggles less both- ersome. This also applies when your path changes or life feels unfair. Remember that countless others have walked this Earth—people just like you—and they persevered. Endurance and resilience require faith in the courageous journey of metamorphosis.” Chronos realized this was the first time Kairos mentioned the Way in rela- tion to metamorphosis. He was intrigued to learn more about his Tradition and this process. “Looking back,” Chronos said, “I think my problem was that when I found myself in a rut, I didn’t know how to get out of it. Honestly, I may have kept myself there.” “Why do you think that is?” “I lost my motivation to live. Or maybe I didn’t believe I had anything pos- itive to contribute. As I became more discouraged, I just wanted to give up. The more I struggled, the more I felt trapped.” “At some point,” Kairos said gently, “this sensation happens to everyone. When learning about the Way, you realize that such experiences are part of your spiral journey, albeit a painful one. Still, these experiences are no less integral to your greatest joys. More importantly, following the Way will transform your relationships.” “How?” Chronos asked skeptically. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  149 “Knowing that everyone is made to metamorphosize changes how you in- teract with others. It makes you less judgmental, including toward yourself. It makes you a better listener and more compassionate.” Chronos remained silent. He wasn’t sure how this was possible, but he was encouraged to know that metamorphosis is possible for anyone. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 150 “Consider how you wouldn’t criticize someone learning to play an instrument,” Kairos said. “You wouldn’t expect a novice to play a complex piece flawlessly.” “That’s true.” “It’s the same with human metamorphosis. To live gracefully is an art. Art is a skill. And like all skills it must be learned. But, of course, this takes time.” Chronos wondered what skills are needed to live a happy life. “You’ve lived your life until now,” Kairos said, “without knowing about metamorphosis. This is not your fault. No one informed you about this process. Your schooling didn’t teach you how to live or how to think; it only taught you what to think.” “Are you suggesting that intelligence or knowledge of history isn’t im- portant?” “No. Knowledge is essential, but not sufficient. What’s needed is a holistic approach to education. In my Tradition, education is crucial for our community to evolve. We want all children to grow up with meaningful relationships and the wisdom to be conscientious parents.” Chronos realized he had never heard anyone speak of conscientious parent- ing. “Before speaking with you,” he said, “I would have said that school is just for training students for a vocation. Where I come from, everyone is in a hurry to get on with their lives, whatever that means.” “Have you ever worked on a project that seemed complicated but wasn’t? It just took more time than anticipated.” “Yes.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   151 “It’s the same with life. It’s not that life is complicated; it just requires a lot of effort. Mastering the art of living well takes time. You cannot hurry this pro- cess, nor does it come by luck.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  152 “There’s one other way the desire to metamorphosize changes your out- look,” Kairos continued. “Think of a time when you felt unmotivated to com- plete a task, whether it was cleaning up a mess or finishing a project.” “Or feeling unmotivated about your life,” Chronos added. “You anticipated my next thought. Now, recall how you felt when someone offered you help.” “I regained my motivation,” Chronos said, wondering what this had to do with metamorphosis. “Feeling discouraged is normal when you don’t know what to do with your life. This is especially poignant when your main drive is to be successful in the eyes of others or when trying to maintain your identity.” Chronos interjected. “I don’t know why this wasn’t clearer before.” “What do you mean?” “You spoke about this before, but now it’s clear how my drive for success— and how it kept me busy—was really just a desire to be perceived a certain way. And I suspect that for others, this isn’t enough.” “In what way?” Kairos asked, curious about Chronos’ response. “They want to be envied.” “True,” Kairos said. “Regardless, the drive for success makes you wake up each day with the same pressure to keep climbing. But once you value meta- morphosis your expectations change.” “I would certainly feel that I didn’t have something to prove.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   153 Chronosclosed his eyes to reflect on how his younger self would have reacted to Kairos' words. “Let’s say being defeated makes you feel humiliated,” Kairos said. “But you are unaware of the link between humiliation and humility.” “There is?” “Humility humbles pretensions. Humiliation levels you. It leaves you flat on your back. Nothing, of course, feels good about humiliation.” “No argument there.” “What’s uncomfortable yet interesting about humiliation is that it reveals something about you—something you never knew.” “And what’s that?” “Your level of humility.” “I don’t understand.” “Humiliation, failure, loss of a relationship, or a setback jolts you like wak- ing from a bad dream. These experiences reveal how self-absorbed you’ve been, which is hard to notice when life is good or when your success boosts your sense of importance.” Kairos’ words unsettled Chronos. He heard his cynical voice say, “If you’re not successful, then who are you?” But another voice in his head asked, “Do people feel important because they are needed, or do they feel needed because they feel important?” The question confused him. Whatever the answer was, he figured it would reveal a lot about human behavior and perhaps shed light on the tension in re- lationships. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   154 Chronostook a moment to savor the scent of pine needles mingling with a faint aroma of wildflowers blooming along the trail's edge. As he reflected on their conversation, Chronos recognized that he was least happy when self-absorbed—though he hadn’t realized it at the time because suc- cess excited him. This thought weighed heavily on him. “Humiliation or loss,” Kairos continued, “makes you see yourself and the world differently. This is when people are most open to metamorphosis.” Chronos reflected on his own experiences of humiliation and shame, but it was unclear how metamorphosis could have helped. He shared with Kairos a time he felt crushed by betrayal. “I wanted to give up,” Chronos said with a heavy heart. “At first, I lost faith in others . . . then in myself . . . and by the end . . . I lost faith in life. I could no longer see beauty in anything.” “This may sound strange,” Kairos said, stepping closer to Chronos, “but when this happens the best thing to do is find faith in others.” “I don’t understand. How could I have done that? I had already lost faith in others.” “This is where knowledge of history and empathy can help.” Chronos grew increasingly vexed by the conversation. Without realizing it, he began to walk faster. Kairos said nothing, maintaining his pace to give Chronos space. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   155 WhenKairos caught up with him, Chronos asked if he could explain how knowledge of world history might have helped him during his personal strug- gles. “First, I want to emphasize that I am not diminishing the pain you experi- enced.” Chronos immediately felt the tension in his body release. “What I mean to convey is that my Tradition draws inspiration from those who persevered despite uncertainty, defeat, loneliness, and feeling unwanted. Strength comes from knowing others who have faced similar challenges.” Only then did Chronos recall Kairos mentioning this, but at the time he had dismissed it. “You see,” Kairos continued, “your journey, struggles, and pain are not unique. As I said before, what you share with everyone is your humanness, in- cluding those you disagree with.” “I don’t think there is anything harder,” Chronos said, “than recognizing the humanness in someone you strongly disagree with, especially during a heated argument.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  156 Kairospaused to look up at two eagles circling above. “When life is chaotic,” he said, “it’s good to put yourself in a holding pattern like those eagles.” Chronos squinted at them, marveling at how the wind gracefully carried them higher in a spiral formation. “Having a broader view of your life is essential to see far and wide. In my Tradition, we call this a historic perspective. It means seeing the vast span of human history in contrast to your own small life. Such a perspective is crucial if you are to . . . step out of your problems.” “But how?” “By first acknowledging the ebb and flow of the human species' develop- ment over time. Don’t just see it. Feel it. Feel the oppression, the inequality, and all the forms of injustice people have suffered. The world’s history mirrors your soul, reflecting your personal journey. When you acknowledge this, you elevate your consciousness. This is necessary if you are to follow the Way of metamorphosis.” This made Chronos wonder what metamorphosis looked like. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 157 Kairosstopped walking. He looked at his companion tenderly and said, “Metamorphosis is the call of loons, reminding you of the peace you long for. It is a midsummer day watching sunlight flicker on water, evoking possibil- ities. “Metamorphosis is the calm before a storm; crickets under a full moon. It is birds chirping before dawn and leaves dancing in the wind. It is the first snow- fall and the first buds of spring. “Metamorphosis is your spirit thawing after a long winter. It is seeing your life ripen into something new. It is watching the sun dip into the ocean as clouds turn orangey-pink. “Metamorphosis is the beauty of simplicity, like the joy of helping others or the peace of a clean room. It is waking at dawn to walk along an empty beach, only to see your footprints fade on your return. “Metamorphosis is the warmth of a fire on a cold winter night. It is cooking under candlelight, a loving glance, a baby's laugh. It is toasting with friends and watching shooting stars. “Metamorphosis is reading poetry on a damp rainy day. It is smelling your new book as you settle into your favorite chair with a warm drink. It is a hot summer night with stars so bright they look like fireflies. “Metamorphosis is the phantom of heat lightning. It is the osmosis of wis- dom. It is being caught in a squall and seeing a rainbow stretch across a dark sky.” “Metamorphosis is the season of change, a balance between laughter and tears. It is a bridge across the abyss. It is climbing a mountain after years of being lost in the valley of despair. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 158 “Metamorphosis is the magic of music that transforms notes into joy. It is the beat of inspiration, a rhythm that brings you back to life and the chorus that keeps you going. “Metamorphosis is the Alchemy of Time. A gestation, a fermentation be- tween this world and the next. Pulsating . . . it contracts and expands. “Metamorphosis is your spiral journey through life, unfolding through time, only to close again like a flower. “Metamorphosis is, my friend . . . what you are made to do because you are your own vocation.” Chronos stood motionless. For reasons beyond himself, he felt something stir within him—something he had never felt before. He also felt relieved to know there is a guiding principle. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   159 Entrancedby the images of metamorphosis, Chronos didn’t notice how the landscape had changed again or that the path now ended at another fork. Kairos chose the western path, leading them back into the forest's heart and out of the sun. As they entered the canopy of the forest the temperature immediately dropped. Chronos felt relieved to be among the trees again. The transformation was a welcome contrast to the rugged, lifeless path. He tried to reflect on Kairos’ words, but the beauty around him was over- whelming. On both sides of the path stood giant birch trees, perfectly aligned like soldiers welcoming them home. The scene felt majestic. “As with all great artwork,” Kairos said, “the forest of Brocéliande can help you transcend your restless heart. It can even absorb your worries.” As soon as Kairos said this, Chronos realized the path felt like walking on a sponge. For the first time today, there was no need to understand. Kairos sensed something shift in Chronos but remained concerned. He knew that once Chronos acclimatized, his negative voice would resurface. He had seen this happen many times before. People can spend days climb- ing a mountain only to be caught in an avalanche. He needed Chronos to let go of his old ways of thinking to avoid that fate. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 160 “Can you smell that?” asked Kairos. “I can. It’s unlike anything I’ve smelled before.” Chronos took another deep breath and laughed. “What’s so funny?” “This reminds me of when I first tasted vintage wine. I spent more time smelling it than drinking it.” Kairos chuckled. Chronos thought this might be a metaphor for life. “Maybe,” he mused, “there’s a connection between fermentation and met- amorphosis.” “This is a special part of the forest of Brocéliande,” Kairos said. “The dark, rich soil here awakens all your senses.” “It’s true,” Chronos acknowledged. “Some people think a forest exists only to sustain flora and fauna. While it’s true that forests don’t need humans to thrive, humans need the healing power of a forest.” “I never thought about it that way,” Chronos said. “But I know my senses are sharper. I can hear the gentle flow of a nearby stream, which was frozen just a couple of months ago. I smell the earth coming alive. I feel part of the forest’s symbiosis. What’s strange and beautiful is that, like osmosis, I sense the forest’s calm entering me.” “This is what Mother Nature offers humans,” Kairos said. “It’s known by many names. Some call it rejuvenation. But, like any gift, you must be open to receiving it, which means you can’t be in a hurry.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 161 Something about being gifted resonated with Chronos. “That’s why not everyone experiences what you feel right now,” Kairos added. “Some people walk through a forest colorblind. They don’t see the beauty of diversity; instead, they see only isolated entities, missing the forest’s symbiotic nature.” “I suppose,” Chronos replied, “to receive a gift, you must be open to it.” Kairos smiled. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  162 Afterentering another part of the forest, Chronos’ cynical side resurfaced without his awareness. Chronos told Kairos how disillusioned he often felt after achieving a mon- umental goal. “Tell me more,” Kairos said. “Imagine arriving at your destination after a month-long journey, only to find no one there to greet you.” Chronos paused and admitted, “Maybe you’re right.” “About?” “About my loneliness keeping me busy.” “Such insights are part of the beauty of your metamorphosis.” “What could be liberating about this?” Chronos sighed. “You are recognizing patterns in the chaos of your being. You see this now because the future seems less important. You've reached an age when most of your life is behind you. There is no more waiting for things to improve.” “That is so true,” Chronos said. “Your journey is nearing its end. The uncertainty that once troubled you is gone, except for the greatest mystery: Death. You no longer need to chase peo- ple or seek success to impress others. You are free to live without relying on anyone for self-worth.” Chronos now understood that needing others for validation made it impos- sible to find peace and hindered his discovery of inner strength. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 163 Aftera long pause, Kairos thought of another way to reach Chronos. “Im- agine being married, and after a few years, the mystery of romance fades into routine.” “Something I don’t need to imagine,” Chronos said in a forlorn voice. “As the years pass you feel underappreciated. You become emotionally parched like a flower drying up. Every day you wander, looking for anything to quench your longings. It is only after wandering far from home that you realize you’re lost. And like we spoke about you resign yourself to hope—hope that maybe, if you’re lucky, life will correct itself.” Chronos tried to guess why Kairos was telling him this. “One day,” Kairos continued, “after an unexpected glance, you find yourself attracted to someone. You feel something ignite in you. No longer do you feel invisible or lost. And for the first time in a long time, you feel alive. Soon you secretly see this person.” Chronos felt Kairos was reading his mind. “As you spend time together, you feel resurrected from the monotony of life. Strangely, all your failures and disappointments fade away. The thrill of seeing this person makes you forget everything and everyone. No longer do you feel misunderstood. Instead, you feel accepted, heard, and desired. Your heart feels mended. And with exuberant anticipation, you walk around with the gid- diness of a teenage romance. But then . . . time steps in. Something happens.” “What?” Chronos asked. “You become comfortable with your new mate. And after a year or so, silly arguments form like wedges until one day you hear a whispering voice in the back of your head. It tells you that your new romance is just a cover, an escape. ‘This cannot be,’ you say. ‘Nothing has ever felt more real. More exciting. More enriching.’” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 164 “Suddenly, you have an epiphany that brings you to your knees. As you reminisce about all the good times you had with your new partner you remem- ber how you experienced these same wonderful feelings when you first fell in love with your spouse, whom you have since divorced.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  165 Chronosunderstood what Kairos meant but remained silent. He didn’t want to relive his past shame and how vulnerable his affair made him. He had become someone else, unable to control his desires. Kairos' words reminded him that the affair was more than just physical. He felt heard, understood, and accepted. It was the joy of being in someone's com- pany without being criticized, with someone who wasn't moody. Over the years, the memory of his affair became lodged in his mind. Like a splinter, the more he tried to remove it, the deeper it penetrated. He had never been more disappointed in himself or more confused. It had never occurred to him that his affair had turned into an addiction. “Why are you telling me this?” Chronos asked, feeling unsettled. “Our Tradition recognizes that humans are born with something called dis- quietude. It lies dormant deep within the soul until something brings it to the surface. Sometimes it feels like a panic attack. Naturally, you do whatever it takes to suppress it, but this ultimately makes you dependent on hope.” Chronos blinked. “What do you mean?” “Hope that someday it will simply subside like floodwaters. The type of hope that the future will miraculously bring happiness.” Chronos listened intently as dark thoughts swirled around him like flies. He longed to be healed. To be put back together and feel whole again. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 166 “Oneof the marvelous mysteries of being human is love. It has been called the sun of the soul. Just as no plant can grow without the right amount of sun and water, no human can grow spiritually without love. Success may make you feel happy, but it will never nourish your soul like love. This should be obvious if it weren’t for a curious problem that plagues each new generation.” Chronos raised his eyebrow. “Humans don’t know how to love. Or, if they do, it doesn’t come naturally since love requires specific character traits. If it were natural, more relationships, including parent-child ones, would be healthier. Receiving love and offering love are not the same.” Chronos didn’t know what to make of this. He found it odd to say that humans don’t know how to love. “What is strange,” Kairos continued, “is how the natural desire for love slowly morphs into something else . . . like wanting to be accepted or adored, which in turn morphs into wanting to be special or even powerful. In the end, only older people seem willing to acknowledge that all their running around could never fill the hole within them. Enough was never enough.” The image of a deep hole within him made Chronos think about his own restlessness. It was always present, no matter where he traveled, what he ac- complished, or who his partner was. “Where do you think this restlessness comes from?” he asked Kairos. “There is no simple answer. Some believe it stems from feeling perpetually unsatisfied or what the Buddha called duhkha. This is why ancient philosophy and many spiritual traditions speak about the need to awaken, to increase one’s consciousness. It allows a person to step over, as it were, their inner disquietude, just as one would step over a snare.” Chronos liked the image of stepping over his anxiety. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   167 “What is surprising,” Kairos continued, “is how restlessness or loneliness can have a redeeming quality. They serve a purpose. Of course, this seems im- possible to fathom when loneliness is crushing your spirit and you don’t feel loved.” “Loneliness serves no purpose,” Chronos muttered. Kairos looked intently at Chronos, who averted his gaze. “What if,” he said slowly, “. . . what if loneliness or despair is meant to nudge you forward? To break you open? To humble you? Or dismantle your pride and habitual ways of thinking?” Chronos looked back at Kairos. This was not something his inner critic wanted to hear. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 168 Beforecontinuing, Kairos waited for Chronos’ cynical voice to fade. Chronos was unaware of how accustomed he had become to this voice or how it restricted him, contributing to his unhappiness. Kairos, however, knew this voice was not unique to Chronos. “I have something else to share with you,” Kairos said, hoping to bring Chronos back to the present. “I believe it will intrigue you.” “What’s that?” “In my Tradition, we believe Sages from around the world form a great fusion called the collective wisdom. These Sages come from diverse cultures but share a common voice regarding the human condition, particularly what drives humans.” Chronos had no idea what Kairos was talking about. “I’m referring to curiosity and despair. Sages have long sought to under- stand despair and find ways to alleviate it and redirect desires so that each hu- man can flourish.” “I don’t think that’s possible. What’s the connection between despair and curiosity?” “We’ll get to that connection soon, but first, I want to discuss despair. In the collective wisdom, Sages agree that a certain question must be asked to over- come despair.” “Not another question!” Chronos retorted, feeling exasperated. “I need an- swers, not more questions.” “Do you still want to hear it?” Kairos gently asked. Chronos didn’t respond. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  169 Kairos felt concerned. From experience, he knew that when a person be- comes impatient in their quest to evolve or heal from past pain, they often give up—just as someone trying to lose weight may stop eating healthy when they don’t see quick results. “I understand your desire for answers,” Kairos assured him. “But there are some questions only you can answer. Metamorphosis is a creative process, and as you know from your own experiences, creating something comes with re- sistance. Unfortunately, people rarely view their personal development this way.” “You mean something to aspire to?” “Yes. I suggest you think of these philosophical questions I have been pro- posing as a meditative tool to uncover deeper truths about yourself—truths that have been dormant.” Chronos wanted to say that doing this exhausted him, but he refrained. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 170 Kairosstopped walking. “Can I tell you the question now?” Chronos nodded, turning to face Kairos. He closed his eyes as if to prepare himself. “When you look back over your life, would you say you were generous with your time on most days? That you were mostly patient, fair, loving, and a good listener?” Chronos immediately opened his eyes, disliking the question and feeling judged. “What does this have to do with despair?” he asked. “Most people want to believe they possess these qualities,” Kairos said. “Some admit they aspire to be this way, while others struggle with the ques- tion.” “Why?” “They cannot bear to be wrong. Their lack of humility blinds them. They believe they can pursue their ambitions while also valuing love, even though they acknowledge their relationships are in disarray or they feel lonely. This is especially true for those whose sole ambition is fame and fortune.” Chronos looked unconvinced. He couldn’t relate since he didn’t seek fame. Although it did make him wonder if his desire for validation, attention, or recog- nition was a subtler form of seeking what fame offers. “If you feel you have something to prove,” Kairos said as he started walking again, “you don’t need to seek fame to be self-absorbed. You could strive to get ahead because you are preoccupied with your self-image. Having something to prove can consume your time when you feel you need to please others or gain acceptance. But this is only half the problem.” “And the other half?” Chronos asked reluctantly, feeling overwhelmed by the conversation. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   171 “It is common for humans to oscillate between self-loathing and self-ag- grandizement.” Chronos looked stunned. This had never occurred to him. When Kairos heard rustling in the bushes, he told Chronos they should keep walking. He wasn’t sure, but he thought something or someone had been following them for the past mile. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   172 Chronosremained silent until Kairos asked what was wrong. “I never saw this paradox in myself before,” Chronos explained. “There were a few times in my life when every day I oscillated between feeling inferior and feeling self-important. Nothing I did was ever good enough. I kept telling myself what I should be like, what I should have done, or what I should have said. Only the future mattered to me; the present was just a means to that end. No wonder joy was so fleeting! I also believed, without voicing it, that my time was more valuable than others.” Kairos listened carefully to ensure Chronos’ tone did not convey regret. It was encouraging to hear him say this. It meant his self-awareness was growing and his consciousness was expanding. “I guess I just answered your question,” Chronos said. “Being so focused on myself—in my desire for acceptance—hindered me from being more loving, more patient, and a better listener.” “This is another example of why metamorphosis is needed,” Kairos ex- plained. “The link between ambition and self-worth is often overlooked, making it exhausting—not just for you, but for everyone around you.” Chronos now understood why he found it so difficult to relax or just be still without wanting to do something or go somewhere. In his drive for success, he had never noticed the correlation between his depression and being overly busy. It was a vicious cycle. Now he realized being busy was a way to suppress his discontent. “Is this what despair is?” he asked himself. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 173 “Iam curious about something,” Kairos said. “Earlier, you implied that when you were young, you thought life should have been easier. Did you believe life rewards good people?” “I think I do.” “Where do you think this expectation came from? The belief that if you worked hard enough, you would be happy?” “I wish I knew,” Chronos replied. “All I know is that life did not reward me.” “In the way you expected, you mean?” “Yes,” he said, breathing deeply. “I want you to think about something we discussed before, as it may help.” “What’s that?” “Contraction periods. These are difficult times you just want to end. But when you look back, you notice a pattern. You see how these times were nec- essary for your growth. Within these patterns, you connect the dots of your life, seeing the mosaic of your journey.” “Patterns like bitterness,” Chronos said, reflecting on difficult times in his life. “Well, for some, that’s true. But even bitterness can be transformed once you realize it’s just another name for resentment. This strong emotion is used to justify anger or disappointment. Sometimes it acts as a shield, especially when there’s been no closure. When this happens, bitterness becomes part of your identity.” “You make it sound easy to move on.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 174 “No. It isn’t,” Kairos responded compassionately. “Consider how contrac- tion periods soften you. If you had known about the Way when you were younger, the difficult times in your life would have been less crippling.” “How?” “Because you would have viewed them through the lens of metamorphosis. You would have accepted that contraction periods are part of every human jour- ney. It’s like turning a monocular around and looking through the other end. Life is hard, but it’s even harder when you believe it should only move upward on a linear path or that it must keep getting better every day, according to your expectations.” “But isn’t it normal to expect life to improve?” “Of course! Except you may want to rethink that superlative.” “You mean the word ‘better’?” “Yes.” Chronos felt lost again. He had no idea what Kairos was talking about. He wished he would stop speaking in riddles. What frustrated him more was that when he thought he was making pro- gress, Kairos would say something that set him back. It didn’t help that his neg- ative voice kept surfacing to remind him he didn’t have what it took. At that moment he had a vision of a jellyfish. He could see its bell-shaped body pulsing gracefully as it ascended rhythmically. This image made him think of metamorphosis and how his conversations with Kairos oscillated. One minute he felt inspired; the next, frustrated. Chronos was so lost in thought that he hadn’t noticed the path ended until he bumped into Kairos. The opening revealed a vast clearing, appearing to be one extensive mound. In the distance, atop the mound, stood some type of structure. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 175 “We will stop there for lunch,” Kairos said. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  176 Asthey approached, Chronos was still unsure what the structure was. It appeared rectangular, with eight-foot-high stone walls adorned with vi- brant green vines curling over them, adding to its mystique. For some reason, it only now occurred to Chronos that they had seen no one during their walk. He quietly hoped this was Kairos’ village. When they reached the entrance, Kairos turned around as if looking for someone. Satisfied, he opened the large wooden gate. Chronos’ eyes widened in disbelief. He wanted to know what this place was, but Kairos had already ventured off, leaving him alone. Chronos stood in awe. He had never seen a garden like this. “Close the gate,” Kairos shouted back. “You must be hungry. I’ll gather something for us to eat.” Chronos closed it and then stood motionless. He soon realized this was no ordinary garden. Every vegetable and fruit appeared twice their usual size. Numerous pathways led deeper into the garden. Chronos took the middle path, but the lushness soon made him lose his way. It felt like a forest unto itself, with rows of thick vegetation and trees dripping with seasonal fruits. Eventually, he found Kairos sitting on a bench with a basket filled with fruits and vegetables. Kairos handed Chronos a huge carrot. He asked why everything was so big. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   177 “All life has the potential to grow fully,” Kairos explained, “including a hu- man life.” As Chronos munched on his carrot, he wondered what a fully developed human even looked like. “There are three reasons why this garden is so lush. First, the soil is highly fertile. The ancient Druids buried their sacrificial animals here on the mound. It is one of nature's great paradoxes.” “What is?” “From death springs life. Second, there is an underground river about twenty feet below us. Even in a drought, this garden remains as you see it now. The roots extend down to the river.” Chronos thought this was a metaphor, but he had no idea what water sym- bolized for humans or fertilizer for that matter. “The third reason this garden is so lush is that a wise and caring gardener attends to it daily. With fertile soil come weeds, and weeds choke new growth. They must be pulled.” Kairos moved the basket closer to Chronos and told him to help himself. After munching on a few sticks of celery, Chronos asked where they would go after lunch. Kairos looked at Chronos and gently reminded him to enjoy the moment without longing to be elsewhere. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   178 “Eating slowly lets you savor each bite,” Kairos said. Chronos was so hungry he didn’t realize he was eating fast. “Taking your time to eat requires awareness. This simple practice extends into your day, starting when you wake up. It includes routine tasks like brushing your teeth. Over time, you’ll appreciate how small pauses create space, first in your mind and then in your life.” “I imagine such pauses would make you hurry less and likely slow down time.” Kairos nodded while nibbling on a radish. Chronos paused to admire the serenity of the garden. The only time he would eat slowly was when he was enjoying a delicacy. After finishing his carrot, he reached into the basket for a plum. This time he ate with intention, savoring the sweetness of each bite and allowing the tex- ture to linger in his mouth. For a moment, he felt both an observer and a participant, the seer and the seen. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 179 Chronos reached into the basket for some cherries and told Kairos he wanted to return to their previous conversation. “Before we arrived at the garden,” he said, “I was talking about how I kept hoping my life would get better. You mentioned that 'better' is a superlative and that it was time to rethink this. But I still don’t understand what you meant.” Kairos explained that 'better,' or the ideal life, came from his culture, which defined the good life and determined what better and best should look like. “Many people's lives,” Kairos continued, “hinge on the word better. As you may recall, this relates to the story I shared with you when you were a boy. Remember, I told you about the animals in the forest who helped the man feel better about his life?” “Yes. But I don’t quite remember the full story,” Chronos admitted. “The reason I brought this up is that it's important to question these super- latives rather than just accept them.” “I see,” Chronos said, tossing the pit from his cherry. “We can revisit this later. For now, I want to discuss two very different views of time.” “I remember you telling me that chronos-time is the linear view of time, which gives us words like chronology and chronicle.” “That’s right. There is another word for time, kairos-time, which is where I got my name. It comes from an ancient fable known as Aesopica. In this book, there is a description of the god Kairos that reads: ‘Kairos cannot be grasped for long because once he moves, not even Zeus himself can pull him back. Kairos is a passing moment, never to return.’” This made Chronos curious about how kairos-time relates to chronos-time. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   180 “Kairos-time is the idea of timing—it makes music possible, allows birds to fly, and bees to make honey. Kairos-time is the cause of your birth. It is what human relationships need to flourish. Kairos-time is acting on chance en- counters. It is spontaneity. Kairos-time reminds you that not everything must go as planned. It is not necessary to control everything. Kairos-time is what speaks to you when you tell yourself you don’t have time for friends and fam- ily.” “I never associated time with friendship before,” Chronos said. “But now that you say this, it seems so obvious. In my thirties and forties, I often told my friends I didn’t have time to meet up.” Kairos looked down, feeling sad for Chronos. “Eventually, those groups of friends stopped inviting me. They must have grown tired of my constant excuses. During that time, I rarely reached out to ask how they were doing.” Chronos remained silent for a moment and added, “Without realizing it, I must have thought my time was more valuable than theirs. Now, looking back, I can’t help but wonder if I subconsciously valued ambition more than friend- ship.” “The only currency of love is time,” Kairos said calmly. Chronos felt these words resonate deep within his soul. He had never con- sidered time to be a measure of love. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 181 AfterKairos’ words settled, Chronos asked if there were grapes growing in the garden. Kairos nodded. “I’ll be right back.” As Kairos walked away he thought about how the collective wisdom trick- les in like thawing spring water. He knew that not everyone who first learns about it has the humility to recognize it. But he also knew that this changes when people see the collective wisdom as a guide—a guide towards a good life. A life filled with meaningful relation- ships. Kairos returned with a cluster of purple grapes. As he handed them to Chronos, he said, “When someone reaches out to spend time with you, and you say you don’t have time, you may rationalize it by telling yourself, ‘There will be other opportunities to get together.’ And before you know it, months have passed without seeing that person.” After Chronos bit into his grape he admitted that this had happened many times. “And, of course, this is just one example of how living solely on chronos- time affects relationships.” “How else?” “Do you remember when we talked about speaking your mind without considering how your words would be received?” “Yes.” “It’s the same when speaking out of anger over what someone said or did. Most of the time, people react without pausing to reflect. They don’t ask, ‘Is this the right time?’ Instead, they say, ‘I just need to get this off my chest.’” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  182 “I’ve done this,” Chronos confessed. “But I’ve also knocked on someone’s door and asked if it was a good time.” “When you did this, you likely wanted something, right?” “Probably,” Chronos replied. As he took another bite of his grape he wondered why he was only learning about kairos-time now at this stage in his life. “This idea of the ‘right time’ is precisely what the Greek word kairos con- veys.” “Instead of setting a predefined date and time to speak to someone?” Chronos confirmed. “That’s right. And notice how this creates anxiety.” “You mean, as the date and time approach the more anxious you feel?” Kairos nodded as he picked a grape from Chronos’ hands. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 183 Kairosstood up and walked over to a nearby patch of strawberries. While watching him, Chronos pondered why he often dreaded confronting someone about what upset him. He never understood why it was so difficult. Kairos returned with a few strawberries. “Put your hands together.” “I still can’t believe how big these are!” Chronos exclaimed, extending his hands to receive the strawberries. Kairos picked one and said, “You’ve probably told someone, ‘My timing was off?’” “Of course,” Chronos laughed. “The advantage of hindsight!” “You’re right. It is the advantage of hindsight, except you don’t want to wait for hindsight to teach you. You want to live with foresight to make wise choices.” Chronos wondered how foresight related to prescience. As he considered this, he realized he rarely relied on foresight to guide him. “But then again,” he thought, “it’s not like you can pick foresight from a tree.” “The point is,” Kairos continued, “if you are not aware of kairos-time, your timing will be off. You don’t want this for important decisions. If your timing is off, the outcome you hoped for could be the opposite.” “So how does one know when the right time is?” Chronos asked, thinking that waiting for the right time might lead to procrastination. Chronos saw no distinction between finding the ‘right time’ and waiting for the ‘perfect time.’ “Now that you are aware of kairos-time, you will be able to sense the right time.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   184 Kairos turned to look at Chronos, smiling as he said, “When you begin to live in a rhythmic state, kairos-time will whisper to you.” Chronos said nothing as he took another bite of his strawberry. Looking back on his life, it always seemed he never had enough time. It felt like he could never catch up. He smiled back at Kairos, embracing the idea of moving from a frenetic state to a rhythmic one, though he didn’t know how. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 185 “I find it strange that even though I knew the importance of timing,” Chronos said, “I never applied it to my personal relationships. It makes me won- der why something so essential isn’t taught in schools. The more I think about it, all of life revolves around conversations, and most people, myself included, are terrible listeners.” “In my Tradition, children learn about this early on. We also teach them the right time to be silent. This helps them avoid overreacting when judged or hurt. Dialogue is an art that must be taught, as no one is born with this skill.” “I suppose you’re right,” Chronos said, reflecting on how often children interrupt each other. “What words,” Kairos asked, “would you use to describe the opposite of a skilled conversationalist?” Chronos wasn’t sure how to respond, so he let Kairos continue. “How about words like rambler, polemicist, gossiper, know-it-all, schmoozer, or whiner?” Chronos didn’t think any of those words applied to him. “Or how about conversational narcissists, who mostly talk about them- selves? Such people lack curiosity about others. The fascinating thing is that all these words share a common trait.” Chronos couldn’t imagine what this could be. “People like this are unaware of their own behavior.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 186 Chronosthought again about his last wife’s comments and how quickly he’d dismissed her. Yet she also dismissed what he had said about her. It then occurred to him that he hadn’t found the right time to speak to her, which explained why she wasn’t receptive. “Maybe,” he thought, “I did not always speak from a place of love but from my wounded ego.” Kairos continued, “If you meet someone at a social gathering who lacks conversational skills, it’s unlikely they will know anything about you by the end of your conversation. Ironically, these people believe they are good listeners, even though they have few caring friends. They often have many failed relation- ships. Of course, there are many reasons relationships end, yet no relationship can thrive without empathetic listening.” As soon as Kairos said this, waves of sadness and anger washed over Chronos. Sadness for not being a better listener and anger at the connections he’d lost because he didn’t nurture them. “Why,” he asked in frustration, “is it so hard to see ourselves as others see us?” “The answer may surprise you, Chronos. If you want to see yourself this way, you must first master the art of dialogue . . . with yourself.” “How does one do that?” “It may sound trite, but you must become curious about yourself. In doing so, you become more curious about others.” Chronos furrowed his brow, deep in thought. The conversation reminded him of their discussion about the relationship between despair and curiosity. “Could a lack of curiosity contribute to despair?” he asked himself. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  187 “The second way,” Kairos continued, “is to participate in the Great Conver- sation.” “I’ve never heard of it.” “It’s called the Great Conversation because every emotion you’ve ever known has already been experienced and written about by someone else. There are no new experiences when it comes to emotional pain. Everyone knows loss, betrayal, unrequited love, jealousy, loneliness, hate, disappointment, rejection, and depression.” Chronos nodded in agreement. “The third way of seeing yourself—as others see you—is so difficult that very few will ever consider it. In fact, it is so distressing it is sometimes used as punishment.” Chronos could not imagine what Kairos was talking about. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 188 “It is impossible,” Kairos said, “to be curious about your inner self when you cannot hear your own thoughts. But, then again, that is precisely the problem.” “I guess that makes sense,” Chronos replied, wondering where Kairos was going with this. “Have you ever known someone for a long time only to discover, to your dismay, that they were not who you thought?” “I have,” Chronos said, not wanting to mention that his first wife had said the same about him, and years later, he had said this about his second wife. “Sometimes this isn’t the fault of the other person, but the one who says it.” “What do you mean?” “It’s common to see only what you want to see in someone, especially at the beginning when everything feels fresh and exciting. The same goes for one- self.” “I’m not sure I follow.” “There’s nothing more unsettling than realizing you’re not living up to your idealized self and nothing more disturbing than uncovering your true in- tentions. People who are too comfortable in their own skin never experience this. This is unfortunate because metamorphosis is impossible without stepping outside oneself.” “And how does one do this?” asked Chronos. “Sometimes life does it for you. Think of when tragedy or grief strikes. The earth stops spinning. Time halts as you drop to your knees. In that moment, you see life in ways you never did before. There is another experience that is also powerful, but it is something you choose to do rather than life forcing your hand.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   189 Chronos wasn’t sure he wanted to hear it. “Is this what you meant by pun- ishment?” “Yes. What I’m talking about is spending time in the silence of solitude, with no distractions, not even reading a book.” Chronos grimaced. The thought of this made him shiver. He realized he had subconsciously spent most of his time avoiding himself, which now struck him as odd. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   190 Fromexperience, Kairos knew people would be reluctant to do this unless they knew something positive would come of it. “If you sit in silence, even briefly, something marvelous happens. You be- come curious about yourself, just as you would when talking to someone you’re attracted to. Silence reveals things about yourself you didn’t know. You could compare this experience to reading an unauthorized biography of yourself.” “It’s strange,” Chronos said, “that you wouldn’t know certain things about yourself.” He paused to look around the garden, lost in thought. “Or is it,” he asked, “that we don’t want to know?” This thought troubled him. It wasn’t the first time he pondered such things; previously, he had shelved them away like a challenging book. “Remember, Chronos, people don’t always do this consciously. Think of living for years with mild back pain. Over time you get used to it. It’s only when the pain becomes unbearable that you have no choice but to confront it.” “This reminds me of when my first marriage ended. After months of grief and self-pity, I realized I had previously attributed my happiness to my wife, and after the separation, I blamed all my discontent on her.” “That is a powerful insight,” Kairos said. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  191 “Even though this was decades ago,” Chronos continued, “I remember that after laying low for a few months, I began to realize things about myself.” Kairos listened while munching on a piece of lettuce. “No, that’s not quite true. I should say it was only after I let go of my anger and healed my bruised ego that I was willing to see things about myself—things I had previously blinded myself to. I guess you could say this is part of my met- amorphosis.” Kairos smiled. “What you experienced happens to everyone. In fact, many times.” “You mean stasis?” Kairos nodded. “After your separation, that was your cocooning time.” “Sadly,” Kairos added, “some people have to endure many breakups or suf- fer through many setbacks to wake up.” Chronos ruefully laughed. “Maybe some people have a higher pain thresh- old.” “Or they’ve fortified themselves,” Kairos said, “so they can endure blows longer. Either way, life will eventually bring everyone to their knees.” Chronos sighed while grabbing a piece of celery from the basket. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   192 “Thisexperience of awakening,” Kairos added, “is like suddenly noticing a background hum that has always been there. In a similar way, silence allows you to hear the inner dialogues you’ve been having without your awareness.” Kairos paused to ensure Chronos was still following him. “Even though the practice of silent listening is enlightening, it can be dan- gerous without self-compassion.” Chronos couldn't guess the reason. “Why is that?” he asked. “Too much silence or solitude can break even the strongest person. That's why I’m not suggesting prolonged isolation. What I am suggesting is brief inter- vals of isolated silence. You might be surprised at how just a few minutes throughout your day can be rejuvenating.” “I don’t see how this is possible. Most people must deal with daily dead- lines,” Chronos said. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   193 Kairosstood up to stretch and then sat back down. He handed Chronos some beans from the basket. “Think of silence as the rest notes between movements in a symphony. Now imagine silence moving like waves—gently sweeping across your con- sciousness, entraining your spirit as a staccato alters rhythm.” “What’s a staccato?” “It’s a musical notation meaning detached. It marks time in a composition, making it more vivid and crisp. What I’m trying to convey to you, Chronos, is that silence is to the soul what harmony is to music.” Kairos paused when Chronos looked away. “As strange as this may sound, silence will nourish you. In silence, you find space. And within this space is peace. For a few moments, nothing obstructs your thoughts. After silence calms your inner turmoil, you will discover a new- found ability to make wise decisions with foresight and even become more cre- ative.” Chronos looked over at Kairos, and to his astonishment, he heard Kairos’ voice in his head saying, “By removing background noise you will see beyond the narrow wells of your consciousness.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 194 Kairostold Chronos he would gather more vegetables. Chronos was so engaged in the conversation that he didn't realize he had eaten most of the vegetables in the basket. While Chronos remained on the bench, he reflected on how he had never considered silence this way. "Maybe," he thought, "this is another reason I kept myself so busy." He disdained silence. It made his loneliness louder. What he couldn’t un- derstand was how silence could alienate him from himself. Chronos was familiar with being alone in a relationship; he knew the feeling of being alone without feeling lonely; and he knew the experience of standing alone in a crowd yet feeling connected by a common cause. The problem for Chronos was not knowing what to do with himself when he fell into the dark hole of despair created by loneliness. It didn’t matter where he went to escape this feeling. It always found him, taunting him, saying, “You cannot run from me.” Strangely, when he returned home from his travels, he felt even more rest- less. Kairos explained that loneliness is part of the human condition—an experi- ence shared by everyone. “What condition is that?” asked Chronos. “Some call it desolation. It is what you feel when you aren’t busy, when you cannot distract yourself. It is a powerful absence, but it is far from empty.” Chronos found the conversation stifling. He began to perspire and wished to end it. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 195 He felt as if he were trapped in a small room with no windows. Never had a conversation made him feel so claustrophobic. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   196 “The key,” Kairos said with compassion, “is not to run from it or think something is wrong with you, because there isn’t. With courage you will dis- cover a powerful impetus to keep moving despite every part of you wanting to shut down and flee.” “Nothing good,” Chronos interrupted, “can come from dread and despera- tion.” “Not true. I will offer one example that comes from a profound truth found in the collective wisdom. It is known as existential loneliness.” “What’s that?” “An unsettling fear of isolation that can occur unexpectedly. The experience is so strong that you do everything to distract yourself from it. It’s like being sick and knowing you’re about to vomit but trying to prevent it.” “So existential loneliness is different from physical solitude?” “Yes. It is the troubling sensation of being estranged from life itself because you’ve become foreign to yourself, including everything you believe in.” “There is nothing more powerless,” Chronos said softly. “And I suppose this experience explains why we do things we later regret.” “The danger,” Kairos said, “is when existential loneliness goes untreated. The soul turns gangrene. We call it death by lack.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 197 Chronoswasn’t sure if he wanted to hear more, but he was curious about what Kairos meant by “a powerful impetus to keep going.” “What could propel a person to keep moving in the face of profound lone- liness?” he asked. “Humility,” Kairos replied. “There’s nothing purer.” Chronos sighed. The answer disappointed him. “Don’t underestimate the power of humility. Within humility, you find hu- manity. And when you find humanity, you become more humane.” Chronos wasn’t sure what this meant. It sounded esoteric until he remem- bered that humane means compassion toward oneself and others. “Loneliness humbles you when you stop running from it,” Kairos added. “When you sit with it long enough your loneliness will connect you to humanity in ways you didn’t know were possible. Slowly and gently, you will recognize that you are not alone in your loneliness. All humans are bound by the same fate—the struggle to live a meaningful existence. But this can only happen within a community that grows out of your personal relationships.” Chronos explained how he never considered his loneliness in relation to anyone but himself. “This is one of life’s strange ironies,” Kairos said. “When you enter the abyss of loneliness, you become—as if for the first time—less alone by becoming more self-aware.” “That makes no sense. How is that even possible?” “Because in the abyss of loneliness you cannot escape your-self. You realize how self-absorbed or self-serving you’ve been. This can even be true if you’ve spent your time helping others.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   198 “That makes no sense.” “It’s a painful truth to admit that you lack humility if you see yourself as selfless despite all the great things you’ve done.” “Is this supposed to make me feel better?” Chronos asked half-heartedly. Kairos didn’t respond. He knew the time would come when Chronos would discover a new way to channel his loneliness, but it wasn’t yet time to speak of this. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 199 “My legs are stiff,” Kairos said. “Mine too.” “We should be on our way.” Chronos stood up and extended his hand to help Kairos up. “It might be a good idea to take some vegetables with us.” “Wonderful idea,” Chronos replied, reaching into the basket for a few car- rots. As he passed through the wooden garden gate, Chronos welcomed the open space. Kairos led them behind the garden to a distant path. They strolled in silence for a while. Chronos felt sluggish from overeating and was tired of talking. He wasn't used to philosophical discussions and, like many, didn’t want to think too deeply. When Kairos sensed Chronos was receptive again, he mentioned wanting to discuss chronos-time, particularly when things don’t progress in the timeframe we set, which breeds impatience. Chronos disliked that his name was associated with something negative; however, he would soon discover how chronos-time and kairos-time are inter- connected. “Are you familiar with the story of Sisyphus?” asked Kairos. “I remember the name.” “Sisyphus was a king punished by the gods for his hubris.” “Remind me what hubris means.” “The opposite of hubris starts with an 'h.'” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   200 “Humility?” Kairos nodded. “Hubris means a lack of humility. The irony for Sisyphus was that his punishment mirrored his luxurious lifestyle.” “I remember now. His punishment was to roll a boulder up a hill, only to watch it tumble back down upon reaching the top. He would then have to walk all the way back down and start again. Nothing could be more monotonous.” “The boulder represents everything a person wants to achieve, and the hill is the effort it takes to roll the boulder up. The problem is that there is no flat surface at the top on which to rest.” “Oh!” was all Chronos said. “In one interpretation of the story, the boulder symbolizes the struggle for success. Each day brings anxiety about whether you will ever reach the top. Then there’s the worry that if you’re not diligent, any progress you’ve made could roll back down or someone else will reach the top before you.” “When you put it that way, it sounds like an absurd way to live.” “And yet the dilemma of Sisyphus is the same dilemma facing many people. In striving to be accomplished in the eyes of others, people spend all their time climbing higher and higher. However, upon reaching the top, they realize their successes have left them feeling exhausted, empty, and alone. In their busyness, they’ve neglected to nourish meaningful relationships.” “Including with oneself,” Chronos added. Kairos nodded. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 201 WhatKairos said prompted Chronos to reflect on friends and family he had lost touch with. As he pondered this, a vision of an abandoned farmhouse suddenly ap- peared in his mind. It stood at the end of a long, tree-lined road. The house seemed to have been falling apart for years, as if it knew it was being neglected. Chronos mentally noted to share this vision with Kairos later. “While spiraling through the peaks of life,” Kairos continued, “there comes a time when those peaks disappear, and you find yourself wandering through valleys of despair. Memories of peak experiences may fade, but having reached the heights of love and happiness, you know there is more to life than just des- pair.” Chronos nodded in agreement. “If the journey through life teaches us anything,” Kairos added, “it is that nothing can expand indefinitely without eventually contracting. This is life’s way of reminding us that our time is not our own and that all humans are part of the same grand symphony.” For a moment, Chronos found strength in this thought. He realized how often he allowed unpleasant moments to overshadow his past joys. “The good news,” Kairos said calmly, “is that the peace you seek is attaina- ble despite the ups and downs of daily emotions. Imagine being on a boat at sea, suddenly struck by a squall that capsizes your vessel. Life is like that; one day you feel excited, joyful, and hopeful, while the next day you feel depressed, an- gry, and exhausted. You will appreciate that when you follow the Way, you develop something akin to a keel and ballast.” “Remind me of the difference between a keel and a ballast,” Chronos asked. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  202 “A ballast is a weighted substance placed at the bottom of a vessel to lower its center of gravity. A keel runs longitudinally along the centerline of the vessel, extending down into the water.” “So then,” Chronos said, “if a ballast keeps a boat upright and a keel keeps it from drifting sideways, how does this apply to humans?” “Everyone needs a spiritual keel to prevent them from straying off course and a spiritual ballast to keep them steady and upright. With a spiritual keel and ballast, you are less likely to be capsized during turbulent times. You live ex- pecting the wind to change direction. The Way teaches you to accept these changes as natural.” Chronos remained silent. He liked the idea of having a spiritual keel and ballast to weather life’s storms, but he wondered how one develops these qual- ities. He contemplated whether this was part of metamorphosis. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 203 Whenthey finally re-entered the lush greenery of the forest, Chronos wel- comed it. The air felt fresh and cool. They walked quietly for a while, listening to the sounds of nature. After some time, Kairos told Chronos he wanted to discuss an ancient prac- tice called sublimation. “You’ve mentioned this before. What does it mean?” “I did, but it wasn’t the right time to talk about it.” Kairos paused and added, “You told me there was a time in your life when you used opium. You said it helped you function by dulling your emotional pain.” “That’s right.” “To access a state of bliss whenever you want is powerful, but, of course, this comes at a cost. Each time you enter a euphoric state, there’s a risk it will become the only thing you desire, including love.” “Are you suggesting that euphoria hinders metamorphosis?” Chronos asked. “In a way, yes. When you’re in a state of bliss or take something to numb you, nothing matters. Nothing else exists. There is no past pain, no fear, no worries, and no boredom. All judgments fade away, including your negative voice. The world’s problems vanish under a blanket of euphoria.” “I think I understand. In a state of bliss, there’s no desire to metamorphose because there’s no discontent.” “That’s exactly right. Think of the Olympian again. Imagine if gold medals were handed out like honorary degrees, so the Olympian only had to show up instead of train. The Olympian might feel euphoric on the podium but, upon returning home, feel ashamed for not taking the risk to lose.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 204 “It seems you’re suggesting that metamorphosis is a remedy for the human condition,” Chronos said, curious. “A remedy implies that once you’re healed from your illness, there’s no need for medicine. In this sense, there’s no cure for life’s ills. There will always be hardships to endure and lessons to learn.” A part of Chronos felt disappointed by the answer. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 205 “Youhave long known,” Kairos said thoughtfully, “that the core of unhap- piness comes from relationships. Whether this be your upbringing, your past partners, those in your inner circle, or your coworkers.” Chronos said nothing. He felt a pinch in his heart. “But of course,” Kairos added, “this doesn’t explain why relationships are difficult in the first place. We shall discuss this later. First, I want you to consider if your unhappiness was sometimes a fiction.” Chronos felt insulted by the question. “What do you mean?” was all he said. “I am referring to how you interpret what others think of you, including your own self-perception.” As he pondered this, Chronos took a bite of his carrot. For a long time, he believed his unhappiness stemmed from being unsuccessful. "Was this also an interpretation?" he asked himself. After reflecting, Chronos asked what this had to do with sublimation. “To understand sublimation, it might help to consider why relapses happen. A relapse is a return to an old, familiar way of feeling safe or a way to forget.” “That’s true.” “It can happen for any reason. For example, you might get impatient with your lack of progress or, conversely, be overconfident in your progress and be- come complacent.” “And,” Chronos added, “it could happen if you believe your life has little value.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   206 “Yes. Value is the key word. But notice that what you tell yourself is only a belief.” “You mean an interpretation?” “That’s right. It’s not something you can be certain of. And regardless of the cause, a relapse is not necessarily a failure. It’s part of your metamorphosis.” This offered Chronos relief. Many times he berated himself for past mis- takes and failures, especially in relationships. “To prevent life’s pain from being self-destructive,” Kairos said, “you need to know that pain can be redirected. This is the process of sublimation. A phys- ical example of this process is how flour is made.” Chronos looked doubtful. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   207 “A water wheel uses falling water to turn an axis. This axis is connected to a shaft, which turns a circular stone that grinds grain into flour.” “So the falling water,” Chronos clarified, “is potential energy that is repur- posed. Are you suggesting this can also be done for emotional pain by redirect- ing this negative energy?” “Yes. However, relapses don’t only occur due to adversity. Joy can trigger a relapse.” “Joy? How can joy be negative?” “Imagine being confined in a dark room for a long time, and suddenly the door opens. The light is blinding. Naturally, you turn your back on it because it’s too intense. Right?” Chronos nodded. “Similarly, feeling unworthy of joy can overwhelm an addict just as it does someone who feels worthless. Such a person might say, ‘Joy won’t last anyway,’ forgetting that no emotion lasts forever.” The conversation left Chronos disoriented. He felt his spirit sink after telling Kairos that he wished he could live his life over again. But even then, he feared making the same mistakes. “I don’t believe you would,” Kairos tried to reassure him. “Assuming, of course, that metamorphosis is something you value and make your primary fo- cus.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 208 Kairoslooked at Chronos with a gentle smile. “The beauty of metamor- phosis is that it changes how you interpret your life. This matters because eve- ryone has a unique journey—a path fraught with difficulties and no guarantees of how it will turn out.” Kairos paused, hearing skylarks overhead. “Everyone faces failure and injustice. Everyone will feel misunderstood and underappreciated. And everyone will experience depression. The key is how you interpret these experiences, as that will determine the extent to which you are affected.” Chronos was struck again by the word "interpret." Kairos had mentioned it when they left the garden, but he was reluctant to question whether his inter- pretations of his life were accurate or how the labels he used to describe himself affected his self-esteem, including how he interpreted the behavior of others. There were, of course, facts about his life beyond interpretation, such as where he was born, when his parents died, and the fact that he was twice di- vorced. “Did my interpretations,” he asked himself, “affect my ability to be happy? Did I believe I was entitled?” Chronos had thought his unhappiness stemmed from circumstances be- yond his control. But now he was willing to consider whether this too was merely an interpretation. What surprised him about this realization was that it gave him strength. The mere suggestion that he might have misinterpreted his life was a relief. He likened this sensation to staying in an abusive relationship for years, hoping things would improve, only to realize how repressive it was once you left. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   209 It only occurred to Chronos now that how he had interpreted his life had been repressive. He had previously believed the past was something you simply recalled without interpretation. And even though he didn’t always remember things ac- curately, he never doubted whether his interpretation of the past was correct. This reminded him of all the times he bickered with his former partners. “Maybe,” he thought, “our arguments could have been calmer if we had been open to different interpretations of the disagreement.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 210 Kairossensed something nearby. “Did you hear that?” he asked Chronos, glancing around. “Hear what?” The forest had grown so dense that nothing beyond the pathway was visi- ble. “I guess it was nothing,” Kairos said, not wanting to alarm Chronos. They walked in silence until Kairos felt he could speak without being overly attentive to his surroundings. “I’d like to discuss the times in your life when you felt stuck. In my Tradi- tion, we call this stasis. Sometimes it feels like a fog has settled over your spirit, making it hard to think clearly. This can happen for no apparent reason, though it shouldn't be surprising.” “Why not?” "Throughout the year, a person's rhythm changes frequently, with cyclical patterns occurring every decade. These shifts can leave you feeling edgy or le- thargic. Regardless of the emotions you experience during this time, life feels heavy, and you may feel as though you've lost all sense of direction." Chronos had experienced this mental fog before. Each time it occurred, he thought something was wrong with him. “When this happens,” Kairos explained, “you can either wait for the fog to lift or panic. You may even think your metamorphosis has stopped. But it hasn’t.” Chronos reflected on a time when he was sailing through life until one day he woke up to find the wind had stopped. His sails went limp, and all his suc- cesses felt insignificant. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   211 “This languid feeling,” Kairos said, “is life’s way of nudging you to pause, rest, and step away from outside stimulation. This allows your consciousness to expand. However, if you resist this time of stasis, your life will contract until you feel completely discouraged. Yet, this too is part of your metamorphosis. Unfortunately, some will only awaken to metamorphosis when they hit rock bottom and lose everything.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   212 “I’ve been there,” Chronos said sadly. “I’ve never felt more alone or scared. I didn’t know what to do or who to turn to. I was convinced I had ruined my life and the lives of others. It was a terrifying place to be.” “What is surprising,” Kairos said softly, “is that redemption can be found when you've hit bottom. This sounds impossible to fathom when you're there, yet one thing cannot be denied.” “What’s that?” “When you hit rock bottom, it means you cannot sink any further. This is when you find yourself saying, ‘I cannot continue living like this anymore.’” Chronos looked away, reflecting on his own experience of hitting rock bot- tom, which had put him in the hospital for weeks. “Once you know about the Way,” Kairos added, “hitting rock bottom be- comes a kairos moment. It doesn’t mean you’ll instantly feel better, but it does mean that misery can be transformed into something beautiful. At the time, it seems unimaginable that one day you will admit that hitting rock bottom was necessary. It was the only way for your journey to begin anew, but this time from a place of genuine humility and forgiveness.” Kairos could tell that Chronos was not convinced. The conversation struck a nerve. A part of him wanted to shut down; instead, he continued to chew on his carrot. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 213 A gentle rustle in the bushes caught their attention, as a curious squirrel dashed across the trail, stopping to inspect them with its bright, beady eyes. “Do you know who Siddhartha Gautama was?” Kairos asked. “No.” “You know him as the Buddha. Long before he became the Enlightenment One, Siddhartha hit rock bottom. Born into a wealthy family, his father shielded him from the world's ills. Young Siddhartha grew up without witnessing old age, sickness, sorrow, oppression, loneliness, or death. “But one day he ventured beyond his family’s villa and discovered the pain in the world. His life was shattered, and for the first time, Siddhartha experi- enced despair. Disillusioned, he renounced his former life to seek an answer to one question: Why is there so much suffering?” “Interesting. So Buddhism would not exist if Siddhartha had not known des- pair.” “Everyone has a turning point in their life. For Siddhartha, it was the loss of innocence. Everything he thought he knew was upended, including his inter- pretation of life. It was despair that awakened his search for another way to live.” “I think Siddhartha’s story,” Chronos said, “is a powerful reminder that des- pair can be redeemed.” “After a long journey throughout India, Siddhartha found the answer he sought and learned how despair can be overcome, or at least, assuaged.” “How?” “His enlightenment came through insights on transcending the human con- dition. These insights are now known as the Four Noble Truths, the fourth be- ing the Eightfold Path. They are part of the collective wisdom.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   214 “I’ve heard of the Four Noble Truths before but know nothing about them.” “The key thing to remember is that his despair humbled him.” “Nothing humbles us more,” Chronos said, “than suffering, in whatever form it takes.” “And yet without humility, we cannot transform. When Siddhartha’s spir- itual veil lifted, he used his time wisely. Slowly, he climbed back up from the bottom. A new path awaited him—a path he used to rebuild his life and find beauty again.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 215 HearingSiddhartha’s story gave Chronos hope that he could change, even at his age. However, he didn’t realize how much his dark side influenced him, causing him to second-guess himself and harbor resentment. This left him feel- ing unworthy and incapable of change. Little did he know, his metamorphosis had already begun. “I want to ask you about something we discussed earlier,” Chronos said. “What is it?” “The time between contraction and expansion periods in one’s life is called stasis, right?” “That’s correct. Why do you ask?” “I’m reflecting on times in my life when I felt unmotivated. Sometimes I spent days in bed without knowing why I felt this way. Maybe I convinced my- self that my life was going nowhere. Yet, at other times, I was full of energy, especially after achieving something. But before long, I found myself in limbo again." “What you’re describing, Chronos, is what my Tradition calls the Satura- tion Point.” Chronos felt relieved to learn there was a name for how he sometimes felt: over-saturated. “I’m curious about something,” Kairos said. “During times of stagnation, you said your life felt like it was going nowhere.” “Yes.” “Do you recall feeling this way because you compared your life to others? Perhaps to people you thought were more successful, more beautiful, or more popular?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   216 “Maybe.” “Is it possible you believed your life had to keep moving in one direction only?” This made Chronos think of the story of Sisyphus. “Now that I understand the difference between moving in a linear upward direction versus a spiral movement, I realize I was driven to keep climbing higher. If I wasn’t excelling, I felt like a failure.” “Reaching the Saturation Point,” Kairos said, “is life’s way of sending you a message.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   217 “When you reach the Saturation Point, it’s common to feel over- whelmed,” Kairos explained. “If it festers long enough, you may feel discour- aged, believing there’s something wrong with you, much like how unhappy peo- ple feel about themselves.” “I guess reaching the Saturation Point is inevitable,” Chronos said. “Let’s say you achieve everything you thought would make you happy but then find yourself in a state of stasis. Fear creeps in, making you anxious about losing everything, including your newfound happiness. Naturally, you cling to what you have, which can make you paranoid or turn you into a hoarder.” Chronos recognized himself in Kairos's words. At different times in his life, his fear had transformed him into both. “When this happens,” Kairos continued, “fear can feel like a sliver lodged in your soul. It’s bearable until it becomes painful. This discomfort prevents you from enjoying the fruits of your labor or appreciating simple pleasures.” “It’s true. Fear and anxiety held me back. At times, I couldn’t feel gratitude.” “And sometimes,” Kairos added, “stasis turns into boredom. This too can provoke fear.” “You mean fear that one’s life will remain the same?” Kairos nodded. “But notice it’s not fear of boredom itself. It’s fear of what boredom signifies.” “What do you mean?” “Ennui.” “I know that word. Remind me what it means.” “Falling out of love with life.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  218 Chronosstopped to catch his breath. He stared at the ground for a few minutes, thinking about his childhood. “Where did my playful nature go?” he wondered. His thoughts drifted to when he fell out of love with his second wife. He recalled asking himself, “Where did the magic go?” After their separation, he felt adrift, lost in nostalgia. He could still see himself standing at the entrance of their empty house, unable to close the door for the last time, overwhelmed by the beauty of shared memories. “Ennui,” Kairos said, “means spiritual weariness. A gnawing sense of dissat- isfaction, accompanied by fear of languishing in boredom.” Chronos remained motionless. It wasn’t until he heard a screeching bird that he remembered where he was. “Being in limbo, or what we call stasis, can leave you riddled with guilt when you lose all motivation despite having many things to do. It’s like trying to walk up a hill made of small balls. Every step causes the other balls to fall, making progress impossible.” “When I look back on these times in my life,” Chronos said, “I was frus- trated because I didn’t understand why I felt this way or how to change it.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 219 Aftera long silence, Chronos asked what he should have done instead. “What I suggest may not seem like a revelation until you practice it. But first, you need to make peace with the fact that stasis and contraction periods are part of your life’s natural rhythm. The key is to prevent these times from paralyzing you.” “And how do you suggest I do that?” “There isn’t a single way. You could start by understanding how your cur- rent mindset relates to never having enough time, which leads you to be in a hurry or run late.” “I don’t see how that would help, but I admit I’ve lived a fast-paced life.” “By being more aware, you’ll catch yourself before you hurry, especially when it’s unnecessary. I’m not just talking about hurrying to get somewhere. It could be anything from reading a book to running errands or talking with some- one. Notice the link between busyness and rushing. Being busy is a form of rush- ing.” “I suppose that’s true.” “When you’re overly busy, you can’t attend to your own needs, let alone the needs of others. The same goes for rushing.” Chronos agreed. “So what is the practice you mentioned that could help me rush less?” “There are many ways to slow down time, including altering your rhythm. And, as you now know, some of these methods are existential.” “By this, you mean what drives a person to do what they do?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   220 “Yes. More importantly, knowing why you do what you do. To answer this question, you need to observe how you spend your time as if watching yourself from a distance.” Chronos laughed. “You want me to spy on myself?” Kairos laughed too. “The practice I’m referring to comes from collective wisdom: to increase your consciousness, you need to break the flow of time by taking brief pauses throughout your day.” Chronos looked away. “You’re right. That doesn’t sound like a revelation!” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 221 Eachstep stirred the earthy scent of damp soil and decaying leaves, a re- minder of the forest’s perpetual cycle of life and renewal. “I agree,” Kairos said. “Pausing doesn’t sound insightful when you have much to do; however, I assure you these pauses add up in surprising ways.” “Like?” “Pausing allows you to hear the competing thoughts in your head vying for your attention. These voices create disharmony in your spirit and leave you feeling restless. Pausing helps these thoughts soften and fade. Without breaks in your day, you won’t notice your anxiety or shortness of breath. If you’ve ever had a panic attack, you know that the key is not to breathe faster. You must slow down by pausing between breaths.” “When you put it that way, pausing makes sense.” “Pausing also helps you remember things you forgot to do and notice things you would otherwise miss. It’s like riding a galloping horse. If you return on the same path at a slower pace, you’ll observe things you missed.” “So, pausing alters my rhythm,” Chronos affirmed. “And I suppose you would say it also slows down time by creating more mental space?” “Absolutely. Notice, too, that pausing can be practiced at any moment— when you first wake up, before a task, an appointment, or a meal. More im- portantly, it’s essential when making significant decisions.” Chronos interjected. “But isn’t this just a mental trick? Whatever problem someone faces will remain, no matter how many pauses they take!” “Have you ever told someone, ‘I need to go for a walk to clear my mind’?” “Sure.” “Well, this practice isn’t entirely foreign to you.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   222 “I guess.” “I’ll return to my sailboat metaphor. Imagine you’re on a sailboat during a violent storm. If you keep your sails up the boat will sink. Dropping the sails to slow down is like pausing. Your problems remain, but you won’t sink. By mov- ing slower, you gain control. Everything becomes clearer, helping you be more alert and feel less frantic.” “And,” Chronos added, “you gain foresight.” “Precisely. Pausing also opens a channel to creativity. Inventions and great ideas don’t arise when the mind is preoccupied.” Chronos nodded. “When you mentioned the sailboat, it reminded me of tapping a compass to realign it.” “That’s an excellent way to think about this. Taking a deep breath and paus- ing does realign you. The next time you begin something, take a moment to pause first.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  223 Chronosreflected on Kairos’ words as they walked among the trees, lis- tening to the wind weave through the forest. He pondered why he struggled to escape life’s busyness, despite complain- ing that everything was moving too fast. Even in his thirties, he felt his life was passing too quickly. Looking back, he realized his life resembled a juggling act. It had never oc- curred to him to simply drop the balls and walk away. “I should add,” Kairos continued, “that stasis can take the form of hiberna- tion. Consider how your emotional state changes with the seasons. Humans are rhythmic beings, after all. As we discussed, everyone experiences an existential lull at least once a year.” Chronos recognized that he often resisted the changing seasons. They sometimes made him feel restless, and at other times, he felt mild depression — or at least that was how he interpreted it. But if Kairos was right, perhaps this was a time of adjustment, not depression. “The next time you find yourself lacking the energy to do anything and feel guilty about it, ask yourself this: Why must I always be doing something?” This seemed like a simple question, yet Chronos didn’t know how to an- swer it. “Stasis is a kairos-time. It is a time for cocooning, resting, and reflecting on your life’s trajectory. It is a time to heal by giving yourself permission to relax. Remember, no human can expand indefinitely. If you keep resisting stasis by distracting yourself or taking on more projects, it will only be a matter of time until you contract. If this happens too often, your mild depression will worsen.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 224 Theywalked a little further until they found a boulder to sit on. A few yards away stood a massive ancient oak tree. “This tree is called Chêne d’Eon, named after Éon de l’Étoile,” Kairos said. “It has a circumference of over twenty-six feet.” “Who was Éon de l’Étoile?” Chronos asked, gazing in awe at the massive trunk. “A Breton monk and religious leader. His story is common. It’s about some- one who started off well, with good intentions of helping others, but the cause he fought for eventually consumed him. He couldn't separate himself, as a per- son, from the cause itself. After gathering many followers, his self-assurance fos- tered a messiah-like belief. Some say this drove him mad.” After a few minutes of silence, Chronos’ thoughts drifted back to their pre- vious conversation. He asked Kairos to tell him more about the Saturation Point. “Think about what happens to a farmer’s land when it rains every day for a week,” Kairos said. “It floods. The land can only absorb so much.” “The opposite is true, too. If there's a drought and it rains heavily for a short time, the land will flood. The human spirit can experience something similar from overstimulation. Some people feel this if their only measure of a good life is success defined by various markers.” “Markers?” “This could be status, wealth, notoriety, or recognition. If this is what you value and haven’t achieved success, you’ll feel you are in a drought. Or if success arrives overnight, you’ll feel caught in a flash flood and be swept away. This creates uncertainty and confusion because there’s no shore to swim back to.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  225 Chronos contemplated this and said, “Before speaking with you, I never thought there was a distinction between a good life and a successful life.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 226 “Without a desire for metamorphosis,” Kairos explained, “many people will never recognize this distinction, making it harder to cope with life’s floods and droughts.” “It’s strange,” Chronos said, “I sometimes feel my spirit aligning with eve- rything you’ve shared, yet a part of me keeps resisting.” Kairos remained silent, pleased to hear him speak of alignment. Chronos sighed. “I feel I have such a long way to go.” “It’s important,” Kairos said, “not to view metamorphosis this way. This is a linear perspective. It will discourage you by making you feel like you’re not progressing quickly enough. That’s why I mentioned stasis—it’s completely nor- mal. Artists often experience this during stasis, just as scholars may struggle with a mental fog that hinders their ability to think clearly or recall what they’ve just read.” This made Chronos wonder how he would remember everything they had discussed. “Eventually,” Kairos continued, “everyone reaches their own unique Satu- ration Point. However, since not everyone understands metamorphosis, not everyone will know how to handle it effectively. Many distract themselves, which can dangerously lead to addiction.” “How can one prevent this?” Chronos asked. “By recognizing stasis for what it is. As I mentioned earlier, stasis is a nec- essary part of your metamorphosis.” “Actually, what I meant was: what should I do with my time during stasis?” “You may not like the answer at first. What I’m about to tell you is a teach- ing passed down from all the great Sages.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  227 With one eyebrow raised, Chronos hoped this wouldn’t be another ques- tion. “Do not resist the restlessness you feel,” Kairos said slowly. Chronos did not find this enlightening. “How does one do that?” he asked. “By not interpreting stasis as something negative, but rather as an oppor- tunity.” “That wasn’t the answer I was expecting,” Chronos muttered, refraining from asking what opportunity Kairos was referring to. “What were you hoping for?” Chronos shrugged, unsure of how to respond. He had been expecting some- thing tangible—anything but the endless gray in which he floundered. “This must be how Sisyphus felt,” he thought. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 228 Asthey continued to look at the tree, Kairos explained that stasis is a calibra- tion period. “Think of it,” he said, “as emotional or spiritual alignment. Stasis is the time between seasons, the space between waves, the silence between sentences. Like an eclipse, it’s a moment of darkness before the light returns. Stasis can last for an afternoon or a few years.” “If spiritual calibration exists, wouldn’t a person first need to acknowledge they are not aligned?” “Yes. If you don’t recognize it, you cannot change. This is why calibration begins with self-reflection, a desire to grow, and a curiosity fueled by a passion for wisdom.” “How does this relate to stasis?” “Stasis disrupts your usual way of spending time, often leading to lethargy that can be triggered by depression. Since it is inevitable, you might as well use this time to advance your metamorphosis.” Chronos struggled to understand but tried to remain patient. “Since you don’t know how long this period will last, there’s no point in worrying about whether your creativity and energy will return. They will. The key is not to become impatient with yourself.” Chronos felt his frustration growing. His cynical side did not want to see any benefits of stasis. “Can you think,” Kairos asked, “of a spiritual leader, past or present, whom you admire?” “I can think of one person, although I don’t believe she saw herself as a spiritual leader. She was certainly well-respected in the village I grew up in.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   229 “Are you thinking of your grandmother that I met?” Chronos nodded. “I’m sure you would agree that despite her leadership, she still experienced the full range of human emotions?” “Probably. But to me, she always seemed composed.” “For the wise, emotions are objects in motion.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   230 Chronosremained quiet for a minute. As they continued to sit on the rock overlooking the tree, Chronos was sur- prised he had never noticed the connection between the words emotion and motion. He asked Kairos to elaborate. “Everything, including emotions, is subject to time. This is why it’s im- portant to ask: What is the best way to move through time?” At first, the question made little sense to Chronos until he remembered Kairos was referring to the movement of a spiral. “Sages do not let their emotions dictate how they feel about themselves. Emotions rise and fall like the tide. In contrast, most people are controlled by their emotions, especially anxiety. Tragically, some will end their lives because they see no way out of their emotional pain.” Having experienced deep depression, Chronos interjected, “Surely, you’re not suggesting that suicidal people should just wait for the pain to subside. This is not helpful when despair swirls around you.” “I am not suggesting that. We will discuss this more. But now we are talking about how Sages navigate stasis. A Sage, when feeling discouraged, for example, can persevere because the Sage understands that stasis is part of metamorphosis, just as it is for a caterpillar to cocoon itself. The Sage expects the spiral of their life to enter periods of stasis and contraction, knowing they will expand again.” This made Chronos wonder if it was perseverance he lacked or the courage to face life’s hardships. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 231 “The beauty in recognizing that everyone you encounter is undergoing their own metamorphosis can be freeing.” “How?” “Because it allows you to experience . . . self-compassion.” “I don’t get it,” Chronos said, intrigued. “To forgive yourself, you need self-compassion. It gives you the courage to continue your journey of metamorphosis by allowing compassion to grow within you.” Chronos’ cynical side dismissed this because he struggled with self-compas- sion. It was unclear to him how metamorphosis could help. Sensing his resistance, Kairos continued. “Sometimes, the ability to feel compassion for oneself stems from others saying you aren't worth it, leading you to believe you have no value." Chronos was hesitant to agree. “Every person you meet is compensating for their own brokenness or anx- iety. When you recognize this, you awaken the compassion already within you.” For some reason, what Kairos said gave him hope. “I mentioned before,” Kairos added, “that stasis is a necessary part of your journey. It’s part of everyone’s journey, including the Sage. Everyone experi- ences a lull—a time when everything stands still. When Sages face this, they remind themselves that this time will pass. They ask, ‘What can this time of stasis teach me? How can I use this kairos-time to further my development?’” “Wait,” Chronos said. “If all emotions are temporary, so is joy.” He realized this was obvious, but in the past, he had been frustrated by how quickly his The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  232 emotional state fluctuated, sometimes even from hour to hour. He wanted joy to last. As if reading his mind, Kairos added, “Everything in life is in motion, in- cluding who you think you are. Denying this puts you in a state of resistance.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  233 Kairospaused, noticing Chronos gazing up at the top of the oak tree, as if he were listening to something. He waited patiently for Chronos to return to the present. When the mo- ment was right, he resumed. “There’s something else that can come from stasis.” “What’s that?” “Entrainment.” “I don’t even know what that means.” “Let’s keep walking,” Kairos said. “There’s somewhere special I want to take you.” “Where?” “You’ll see,” Kairos replied with a smile. “So what does entrainment mean?” “Physical entrainment is when two or more rhythms align. For example, when two pendulums are placed close together, their oscillations eventually synchronize.” “I didn’t know that,” Chronos said, wondering if this could happen between people, especially in romantic relationships. Chronos slowly stood up without another word, eager to continue walking. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   234 “There is also something called spiritual entrainment. Think of it as a reset or an invitation to begin anew. When you allow yourself to follow the flow of stasis—by not resisting it—you enter an entirely different rhythm.” The word ‘resisting’ caught Chronos’ attention. “Spiritual entrainment lets you dive deeper into yourself, much like digging deeper when your drinking well runs dry.” “Do you think spiritual people can run dry too?” Chronos asked. “Yes. It happens to everyone. Except the enlightened person expects it. This is the nature of the spiral movement of human metamorphosis. When someone follows the Way and feels resistance from life or becomes dysphoric, they don’t fight it. Instead of believing something is wrong with them, they examine how they spend their time. They see resistance as an opportunity for entrainmen t.” “What does dysphoric mean?” “Dysphoria is a Greek word. It describes the experience of standing on a precipice and wanting to take the next step, convinced that this is the only way to escape life's pains. Dysphoria is the breaking point, but it is also life’s way of sending you a message.” Chronos took a deep breath while looking down. “I understand now,” he said softly. “Dysphoria is a catalyst for metamorphosis.” With his hand on Chronos’ shoulder, Kairos added: “Yes, my friend. It is. It means admitting that your life—all life—follows the spiral movement of con- traction and expansion toward greater self-awareness. On the other side of this dark time is finding joy in meaningful relationships, independent of one’s iden- tity.” Chronos followed Kairos until the last part. “What did he mean by iden- tity?” he wondered. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  235 “It is strange,” Chronos said. “I don’t know why I’ve never heard of entrain- ment before. I don’t know why but I find it reassuring.” “In what way?” “I guess my perception of a spiritual person or leader is someone who has their life together. They always seem patient and calm.” “Is it possible,” Kairos said, “that the calmness you observed was just a fa- çade?” “What do you mean?” “Some who consider themselves spiritual seem calm only around those who admire them, except at home they are a different person.” “You think so?” “We’ll discuss this more later. For now, just understand that when you wake up each day and see your life as a layered process of metamorphosis, you will feel less worn down and lighter.” “You mean the pressure of always trying to accomplish something to feel better about oneself or the pressure to be better than others?” “Yes. For some, this is true. For others, especially young people, it’s the nagging feeling of never being good enough. Parents can exacerbate this with- out realizing it, as this is how their parents treated them. They remain unaware of the pressure they place on their children to succeed. Later, I will explain how this relates to the phenomena of ‘gaining face’ and ‘saving face.’” Chronos knew the expression “saving face” but not “gaining face.” He was curious to learn more. Still, he remained puzzled by how awareness of meta- morphosis could affect his mental state or improve his mood. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   236 Theconversation about metamorphosis, its connection to entrainment, and its relevance to relationships intrigued Chronos. It made him reflect on all the time he wasted just waiting. Waiting for his life to begin. Waiting for his life to improve. Waiting to meet the right person. Waiting for his luck to change. Or waiting for life to finally make sense. He told Kairos that he felt he had searched his entire life for a master key. “What do you mean?” asked Kairos. “I guess I thought there was one key that could unlock everything.” Kairos pondered this for a moment, unsure how to respond. “Life can feel like a maze,” he finally said, “with walls so high it seems im- possible to know if it ever ends. Every door you encounter is locked. But still, you try, hoping one will open. Years pass unnoticed until you realize there was never a door between you and the way you wanted to feel inside.” “I’m not sure why you’re telling me this.” “I think what happened to you is that you expected every door to be open for you. And when doors didn’t open, you convinced yourself that life is unfair.” “Hmm . . .” Chronos muttered. “It’s like playing cards and believing the dealer has stacked the deck against you, so you fold and walk away from the table.” Kairos paused again to gauge Chronos's receptiveness before continuing. “You see, in my Tradition, a person’s life is not measured by what they do, but by who they become in their doing. The danger is confusing this with suc- cess.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 237 For reasons beyond himself, Chronos felt a sense of relief until a thought struck him. He had lived without knowing how to measure the value of life independent of success and was now beginning to feel the full weight of lost time. Kairos sensed his disappointment. “Redeeming time is possible,” he said. “Consider a human lifespan. Does it consist of only memories?” “I don’t know,” Chronos replied. “Sometimes I think I’m just an accumula- tion of my memories. If so, do memories define or limit one's identity?” “Think about the twenty-four-hour lifespan of a mayfly or how a cereus cactus flowers once a year, at night, and wilts at dawn. From the perspective of Earth's age, everyone's life is as fleeting as a mayfly's and blooms for the same brief time as the cereus cactus.” “Is that supposed to make me feel better?” Chronos asked half-jokingly as an insect buzzed by his ear. “And besides, what does this have to do with re- deeming lost time?” “What if you had to condense your existence, your lifespan—including your accomplishments—into a single day? There would, of course, be thoughts of regret but also joy and laughter. If you had to distill your life, what would be the essence? What would your memories amount to?” “Amount to?” “What do you want your last memory to be?” Chronos repeated the question in his head, unsure how to answer until Kairos added, “You may think what I'm about to say is a platitude, but when your time comes to die, will you do so with a smile of joy on your face or a furrow of loneliness on your brow?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   238 This question stung more than the others. Chronos felt his emotions swell, finding it difficult to breathe. Speaking softly, Kairos added, “Who do you want by your bedside holding your hand when you take your very last breath and all your memories flash before your eyes? Or, if you can’t think of anyone, what would you enjoy listen- ing to or seeing as you cross over?” When Chronos looked up at Kairos, he saw only compassion in his eyes, not judgment. This gave Chronos strength. He didn’t want to die alone in his loneliness. He knew who he wanted holding his hand—his first wife. But she had died a few years ago. Chronos was amazed that no one had ever asked him this before. It made him walk slowly. Kairos moved ahead to give him space to reflect. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   239 WhenChronos caught up, Kairos asked if he felt his life resembled an hour- glass he kept flipping over. “I’m not sure what you mean.” “Did you not feel like you were always running out of time?” “Of course,” Chronos replied, wondering what rabbit hole he was about to enter. “How do you think this affected your state of mind?” “I suppose it made me anxious. There was always an unspoken demand to keep up.” “Interesting! Tell me more.” “The word I’m thinking of,” Chronos sputtered, “is momentum. Like gain- ing speed running down a steep hill, knowing you can’t just stop without tum- bling.” “Anything else?” Kairos asked, stroking his beard. “Yes. I think the feeling of never having enough time affected my ability to concentrate and be attentive to others. My thoughts were dominated by every- thing I had to do. And then, at the end of the day, I would feel guilty for not completing what I hoped.” “And now?” “Now I realize, thanks to you, that my fast-paced life stemmed from my desire to accomplish things to be happier.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 240 “Looking back, I kept over-tightening my life,” Chronos said. “What do you mean?” “Like tightening a violin string. I lived in fear that my life could snap, yet I kept winding it up anyway, even though I was making the same mistakes. No doubt, this contributed to my constant tension. It was always there, even if I wasn’t aware of it.” “I don’t recall anyone comparing their anxiety to a violin string about to snap.” Chronos laughed. “I hadn’t either until now.” “Let me ask you something. Whenever you had free time, did you keep busy or use it to rejuvenate and reorient yourself?” “The former,” Chronos replied, looking down. “I suppose my busyness be- came a habit.” “Remember when we talked about expanding your consciousness by be- coming more aware?” “I do.” “Think about what happens when you’re in a hurry. You misplace things, fumble, bump into walls, perspire, or feel panicky. Then, when you lock your door, you suddenly remember something you forgot, which only makes you more late. Most of the time, people aren’t even aware they’re rushing.” “Are you saying that if I had been more conscious of kairos-time, I could have stopped myself before I rushed?” “Precisely. For example, when you need to arrive somewhere at a certain time and have things to bring or do before you leave, you can either do this in The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 241 advance or convince yourself you have plenty of time and leave everything to the last minute.” Chronos laughed. “I’ve never done that.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  242 “The time it takes to do what you need to do before leaving is the same,” Kairos said. “It’s not as if you save time by postponing what you must do. What changes, however, is how you feel when you leave and when you arrive.” “It’s strange,” Chronos said, “that we always think we have more time but never seem to learn.” “Notice how rushing spills over into other parts of your life. This could mean forgetting birthdays, feeling scattered, being clumsy with your words, or neglecting your own needs.” “It seems obvious now.” “If these are the types of mistakes you make when your mind is busy or you’re rushing, imagine the mistakes you’ve made when making life-defining choices.” Immediately, Chronos felt as though his soul had been scalded. “What was I rushing towards?” he whispered. “This is one of those questions that leaves you flat on your back. But once you give it serious thought, it will feel like scales falling from your eyes. You will wonder how you could have been so blind.” Chronos felt frustrated that the answer wasn’t obvious. “Before you are too hard on yourself,” Kairos said, “remember it is human nature to want to finish what you start and to have a sense of accomplishment.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 243 The path led them to an overflowing river and a swaying hundred-foot wooden bridge. “That doesn’t look safe,” Chronos said nervously. Kairos smiled and stepped onto the bridge, while Chronos watched him wobble like a drunken sailor. The moment Chronos stepped onto the bridge, he felt the hair on the back of his neck stand on end. Peering down, he estimated the drop to be two hun- dred feet. The thunderous roar of the river below only heightened his unease. “Come on,” Kairos waved. Chronos gingerly made his way across. With his right hand now sweating, he grasped the rope railing. At the halfway point, Kairos stopped. The boards creaked as he leaned on the railing. When Chronos finally reached him, he was sweating profusely. “You’ll be fine,” Kairos said, patting Chronos on the back. “Do you see the otter sitting on that rock?” “Yes,” Chronos replied, stepping closer to Kairos. He could barely hear him over the raging river. As Chronos carefully leaned on the railing, he wondered what lesson Kairos had in store for him now. “When an otter enters the flow of a river in spring,” Kairos said, “the cur- rent is so strong that it exhausts the otter. The river doesn’t mean to tire the otter. If it gets caught in the fast-moving water, it swims perpendicular to reach the shore, rests, and then tries again at the right time. The otter knows that if it The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   244 keeps swimming upstream, it will die from exhaustion. The otter does not blame the river; it, too, has a destiny. It must flow to the ocean.” “Why are you telling me this?” Chronos asked. “Once you appreciate how nature wields itself through contrasting rhythms, you can apply this to your own life. You will see how this changes everything, including how you interact with others. Think about all the times when time wore you down and how you fought against its current.” “That seems to define my life,” Chronos said, staring at the otter scurrying around. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  245 “It is resisting life’s natural rhythms,” Kairos added, “that makes life feel more like a struggle than something to enjoy. This resistance affects your rela- tionships and daily living, including how you feel when you wake up each morn- ing. As we discussed, when you recognize a lack of harmony in what you do, it’s time to rechart your life.” “So, how does one access this rhythm?” “I must warn you. The answer may not be appealing, but it shouldn’t sur- prise you.” “I’m listening,” Chronos said, expecting another riddle. “You need to be still long enough to feel it. Rhythm cannot be sensed when you’re busy. This may seem unimaginable when there’s so much to do and you feel overwhelmed. Sometimes it feels like no matter how hard you swim, you can’t get ahead. The current is too strong.” Chronos knew this feeling well. “There are times in life,” Kairos continued, “when nothing feels rhythmic. Life feels like listening to musicians tune up—disparate notes clashing together, creating a dissonant blend of pitches and timbres. I’m sure you remember how relieved you felt when the musicians stopped and finally started playing. Know- ing it was temporary allowed you to endure it. This is what metamorphosis is about—moving from inner chaos to harmony.” Chronos wondered if Kairos meant that chaos served a purpose. “The moment between chaos and harmony,” Kairos said, “is the stillness I speak of. It’s the split second of silence just before the orchestra begins.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 246 Theconversation made Chronos see his life as a series of chaotic timbres. Yet, he knew it hadn't always been that way. He certainly didn't feel that way as a child. “When did my life start to feel chaotic?” he wondered. He asked Kairos how to find the stillness he had spoken about. “If you go looking for it, you won’t find it.” “What do you mean?” “Think of when you misplace something and then discover it was right in front of you all along.” “What does this have to do with stillness?” “The lasting peace you seek won’t come from visiting sacred places, finding a holy person, or marrying the right person. You’ve heard it said, ‘Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.’” Chronos had heard this before but couldn’t recall where. “If you’re not at peace, it’s not because you can’t find it. It’s because you have no time.” Chronos’ eyes widened. “It’s because of your treasure,” Kairos added. “Meaning?” “Meaning, what you value determines how you spend your time. You’ve heard me say this before. If you don’t value stillness, for example, then every day will feel like you’re spinning. The good news is that if you pause long enough, you’ll discover the stillness within.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   247 “But that’s the problem. I don’t feel it.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 248 Chronoswalked to the other side of the bridge to see if he could spot the otter. Kairos followed. “When we spoke earlier about listening to silence,” he said, “I didn’t mention the paradox you would uncover.” Chronos scratched his head and moved closer to Kairos to hear him. The irony of the raging river didn’t escape him. “At the heart of loneliness is a quiet stillness.” At first, Chronos found this insipid. Besides, he wasn’t the type to remain still for long anyway. “When you find a quiet, uncluttered room, you will discover your rhythm through stillness. Of course, there are other ways, like walking in nature.” “And do what?” Kairos smiled. “Nothing.” “Is this another riddle?” Chronos muttered. “No. When you enter a quiet room, for example, with the intention of do- ing nothing, you will be surprised at how you feel. Silence creates a visceral response, just as walking in nature does.” “I would agree, except silence doesn’t create the feeling you’re talking about.” “At first, you’re right. You will feel edgy and then restless, assuming there’s nothing to distract you.” Chronos raised an eyebrow, looking at Kairos in disbelief. He laughed. “What you’re describing sounds as desirable as flagellation.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  249 Kairos chuckled. “Actually, you might be surprised that those who whip themselves feel a release. Your comparison isn’t that far off.” With a wry smile, Chronos told Kairos he would pass on meditating. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 250 “When we discussed silence in the garden, I know it sounded crazy to you. I don’t deny that silence can be uncomfortable; otherwise, people wouldn't need background noise.” It had never occurred to Chronos that he habitually needed background noise. “I’d like you to consider the power of silence by comparing it to being in a small boat during a violent storm, struggling to stay afloat.” Chronos shot Kairos a quizzical look. “I don’t see the comparison.” “When the storm finally passes and you wake up at sunrise, you immedi- ately feel a profound sense of relief. The once turbulent water now gently laps against the hull of the boat.” Chronos had never experienced this, but he could imagine the relief it would bring and how it would create a sense of serenity. “The relentless wind and pounding waves have given way to tranquil si- lence,” Kairos said. “You feel a stillness within you. You feel focused, in control, and stable. And when you hear the occasional call of seabirds, you know land is close.” Chronos figured the sound of seabirds was a metaphor, but he didn’t know what it represented. He confessed to Kairos that he longed to experience what he described, but without a violent storm. “As you gaze out at the peaceful, expansive ocean, you feel all your senses heightened. Your mental fog has lifted, and you have renewed clarity. With this comes fresh insights about your life, particularly how you spend your time.” “Okay,” Chronos laughed. “I think you’ve convinced me that my turbulent lifestyle was a storm. I can see now that it clouded my judgment.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 251 Theywalked back to the other side of the bridge. “What I hope you see,” Kairos said, “is that in the solitude of silence, you discover the inner storm that keeps raging within you. We all have our own storms to confront. But unlike a natural storm, the inner storm won’t subside on its own.” Chronos knew his inability to sit still was one reason he kept busy. He con- fessed to Kairos that he wore his busyness like a badge of honor. “For some, the mundane keeps them occupied,” Kairos said. “For others, it’s despair, a lack of love, or feelings of unworthiness. Some try to escape these feelings by traveling, for example.” Chronos looked at Kairos and added, “I know that when I spend time away, visiting new places and meeting new people, I feel revitalized. But when I return home and settle into routine, the same drudgery resurfaces.” Chronos paused to watch the otter. “Are you suggesting,” he asked, “that finding time to be still is somehow revitalizing like traveling?” Kairos nodded. Chronos found this hard to believe. “When you practice being still, you’ll be surprised at how the murkiness in your mind clears.” “It sounds strange to talk about the practice of being still.” “Granted. It does sound strange, but just as you can’t see the bottom of a river when it’s cloudy, you cannot see the depth of your soul when you’re in motion. As one Sage put it, ‘Only the person who can keep silence can really act, for silence is of the heart.’” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   252 Chronos reflected on some of the life-defining decisions he had made, par- ticularly in relationships. “If foresight,” he thought, “comes from stillness, I wonder how many dif- ferent decisions I would have made?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 253 “There it is,” Chronos said, pointing to the otter. “I think it’s going to drown. The water is moving too fast.” They both watched it, silently cheering it on. After the otter climbed onto a rock to rest, Kairos continued. “I know it may not be easy to find a quiet place, but once you make this part of your routine, you will crave this time. It’s never too late to start. You could begin by finding stillness early in the morning or late at night when eve- ryone is asleep. Stillness is essential for growth. A caterpillar cannot transform into a butterfly until it cocoons.” “That’s true, but what about those times in my life when it felt like I was just treading water?” asked Chronos. “How would being still have helped me?” “This is why the spiral image of human life is so powerful, especially during times when you don’t feel like yourself. As we discussed, humans are meant to expand, but during this process, they will also experience stasis and contraction periods. This is the ever-changing rhythm I keep talking about.” Kairos paused as they watched the otter make another attempt to reach the shore. “You cannot expect to feel good every minute of the day. There will always be periods of contraction and stasis in your life. They serve a purpose if you don’t resist them.” Chronos heard his inner voice whisper, “It is an insult to say someone's inner turmoil serves a purpose. Stillness solves nothing. It’s just a technique with no lasting value.” When Kairos noticed Chronos’ expression, he said, “You might think the idea of being still to create inner space is unhelpful, but let me ask you this: Have you ever said to someone in exasperation, ‘I just need my space!’?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   254 “Yes.” “Well then, you understand what I’m talking about.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   255 WhileChronos watched the otter swim frantically to the next rock, he re- alized he had never used words like rhythm or contraction in relation to chal- lenging times in his life, especially in relationships. “Disharmony in life,” Kairos said, “can arise from rhythmic changes. Some- times these changes stem from inner dissonance due to unfulfilled expectations or being out of tune with ourselves, among other reasons. When unhappiness grows, the disharmony becomes louder.” Chronos felt his cynical side resisting what Kairos was saying but didn’t un- derstand why. He thought Kairos might be downplaying his past struggles. “If you expect your life to be in flux, unpredictable, and uncertain, you’ll be surprised at how much less frustrated you feel. Even depression will visit you less often, or at least with less intensity.” Chronos didn’t want to admit this was true, though he acknowledged that it didn’t take much for him to feel frustrated or agitated. “There is always an underlying rhythm to the steady ebb and flow of your emotional state,” Kairos explained. “It’s not uncommon, for instance, to feel optimistic and happy in the morning and then, by late afternoon, wish the day would just end.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   256 Theotter was making progress. It had two more rocks to reach to make it to shore. “I have a question for you,” Kairos said. “When you think back on past dis- appointments, I’m sure you remember that new opportunities eventually arose.” “True, except not what I expected.” “Disappointments are contraction periods in your life,” Kairos explained. “Wishing them away is like a pregnant woman resisting her own contractions.” Chronos didn’t respond immediately. He was focused on the otter. It lost its footing again and slipped into the churning water. “At least a pregnant woman has something to show for her labor,” he said. “What if human metamorphosis is similar?” asked Kairos. Chronos’ skeptical side wondered if Kairos had ever experienced despair or grief. “When you’ve been dragged through life,” he said, “you lose faith in life itself.” “Not everyone does, Chronos.” Kairos pointed to the otter. “Humans are part of nature just like this otter.” Chronos disliked the comparison as he watched the otter frantically paddle to shore before being carried too far downstream. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 257 “Look,” Chronos exclaimed, “he made it!” They smiled as they made their way off the bridge. “Think about when a volcano erupts,” Kairos said. Chronos shot Kairos a quizzical look, unsure why he was suddenly talking about this. “The rupture begins deep within the earth, unnoticed for years, and then, in a matter of days, it destroys everything. Yet, despite this devastation, nature has a mysterious and rhythmic ability to rejuvenate itself.” “Rejuvenate,” Chronos echoed in his mind. He told Kairos that was the word he had been searching for to express how being in the forest of Brocéliande made him feel. “I’m glad to hear that,” Kairos replied, momentarily forgetting his train of thought. “What was I talking about?” he asked. “Volcanoes.” “Right. Now, if a volcano erupts in the ocean, it can create an island. Over decades, this barren island will transform into a lush, vibrant forest.” “Are you comparing a desolate island to despair?” Chronos asked. “If so, there’s no comparison.” “I am. Think about how despair emerges from deep within the soul. It grad- ually rises until it erupts, altering the landscape of your life. One year, you feel on top of the world; the next, you feel crushed. Everything changes.” Chronos sighed, reflecting on moments when his own life had erupted. Just the thought made his heart race. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  258 “Despair is temporary,” Kairos said softly. “I know that may not be reassur- ing when your life is falling apart. But if you can sit with despair long enough, you’ll discover something surprising.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 259 Chronosstruggled to see any good arising from despair. The idea of wal- lowing in one's own desolation felt both sophistical and futile. His heart felt heavy as he glanced back at the otter, now scampering about. To his surprise, it did not return upstream where it had initially struggled; in- stead, it began to forage anew. “In my Tradition,” Kairos said, “we believe it’s possible to redirect despair. But that requires faith in the possibility of human metamorphosis.” “Faith?” Chronos repeated, glancing back at Kairos, only to miss the otter snatch a frog. It wasn’t the food it had originally sought, but it seemed satisfied. Chronos took a deep breath. “Life is too complex to believe despair can be redirected, whatever that means.” Kairos was the first to step off the bridge, and Chronos quickly followed as the wind picked up, causing the bridge to sway even more. “Look at these flowers,” Kairos said, pointing down. “Are they complex?” “Flowers don’t suffer,” Chronos shot back. “They don’t look in a mirror to witness their wilting. They don’t grieve or ponder their impending death. They don’t harm other flowers or feel the pain of lost youth. They don't battle depres- sion or care for aging parents.” “No, they don’t,” Kairos responded with a hint of sadness. “But flowers also don’t know joy or experience love. They don’t gaze at the heavens with wonder and awe. They don’t know the satisfaction that comes from accomplishment, made possible by resilience and fortitude. Yet, somehow, the simple beauty of a flower can soothe the soul and inspire one to keep going.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 260 “I think I’m just tired,” Chronos said, feeling defeated. “Or maybe I’m ex- hausted from living. I’m weary of the seesaw motion of life... But maybe you’re right. Some of my problems might have arisen because I rooted myself in bad soil. No amount of water could revive me. I told myself a sad story about my life and convinced myself it would never get better. I had resigned myself to my own resignation.” Kairos felt a wave of sadness hearing Chronos express this. He asked why he felt this way. “Over time, I came to believe my life could only go in one direction. I con- vinced myself that only certain things would satisfy me. I suppose I turned hap- piness into a chess game and people into chess pieces. When I was much younger, everything I did was a strategy to outmaneuver others.” As he placed his hand on Chronos’ shoulder, Kairos said this reminded him of a saying from the Greek poet Hesiod. “Wasn’t Hesiod the one who told the story of Pandora’s box?” “Yes. In his poem Works and Days, he wrote: ‘The gods keep the means of life concealed from humans; otherwise, they could easily work in just one day.’” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   261 Chronos found Hesiod’s words profound, yet the meaning eluded him until he thought about the Greek Olympians. “If winning a medal requires little effort,” he remarked, “I doubt an Olym- pian would value it as much. Similarly, if life were simple and lacked mystery, humans might become more lethargic.” This perspective surprised Kairos; he had never heard anyone express it this way. “The collective wisdom,” he thought, “is speaking to him.” He was about to tell Chronos that Hesiod’s words also apply to beliefs held with certainty, but he sensed it wasn’t the right moment. There was something else he wanted to share. “The seed of a flower,” Kairos explained, “must rise from darkness to reach the light. Every life that aspires to flourish will face challenges, but a seed doesn’t require fortitude or courage to grow. A human, well, that is a different matter.” “Undoubtedly,” Chronos agreed somberly. “This all ties back to the human condition,” Kairos continued. “Humans desire happiness without fortitude, success without courage, risk without fail- ure, and expect love without metamorphosis.” Chronos experienced a moment of insight upon hearing this, akin to hold- ing a torch in a cave and briefly illuminating ancient pictograms, only for the light to be snuffed out by a passing breeze. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 262 Fora split second, Chronos saw the entirety of human history flash before him. He realized that everything, including despair, is in a constant state of transformation. This insight instilled a fleeting sense of hope within him. They continued walking at a steady pace. Chronos reflected on his busy life once more, but his cynical side tried to convince him that with all of life's de- mands, he would have had no time to practice the things Kairos suggested. Kairos sensed Chronos was succumbing to his cynical thoughts. Chronos quickened his pace, appearing distracted. “You mentioned,” he said, “that you’ve experienced waves of anxiety throughout your life. Deep in your soul you felt restless. You said this was al- ways present like an ambient hum.” “Yes, that’s true,” Chronos replied. “You also said you often lacked focus and sometimes procrastinated on even the simplest tasks. And at various times of the year, you mentioned expe- riencing unexplained fatigue.” “Doesn’t everyone?” Chronos countered. “Yes, to varying degrees. When you felt these emotions, do you recall what you did with your time?” “You know the answer,” Chronos said with a half-smile. “I busied myself even more, especially when I felt unhappy. But that doesn’t explain why I al- lowed myself to live so . . .” “What?” Kairos prompted. “I’m searching for the right word.” Chronos glanced up at the trees as if seeking inspiration. “Routinely?” he suggested tentatively. Kairos paused before responding. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   263 “Routine,” he finally said, “provides stability and comfort.” “But?” “When you become too comfortable in your routine, you lose self-aware- ness, which hinders your growth. As we discussed, routine can blind you to key opportunities that could enrich your life.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 264 Chronosstood motionless. “I can’t believe I never noticed this before,” he exclaimed. “Saw what?” “I remember a time when I felt overwhelming jealousy. I had never experi- enced such anger before. Unknowingly, I used that anger to shield myself from feeling vulnerable, hurt, and unworthy. Yet, I never took the time to understand my jealousy. Instead, I busied myself.” “This is more common than you might think,” Kairos replied. “Please, go on.” “To this day, I’m unsure where this rage originated. Sometimes I wonder if it was always in me. Regardless of the source, I now recognize the truth in what you mentioned earlier: life's trials reveal your true nature and show how much you rely on positive circumstances for happiness.” “Your insight,” Kairos remarked thoughtfully, “illustrates why metamor- phosis is so crucial in my Tradition. Once a person becomes aware of the Way, negative experiences lose some of their sting.” Taking a deep breath, Kairos continued, “This may seem unrelated, but consider the practice of fasting. It can be incredibly rejuvenating when done oc- casionally. Spiritual fasting is similar.” “Spiritual fasting? I’ve never heard of that.” “If fasting means abstaining from food and substances like alcohol for short periods, then spiritual fasting involves stepping back from the sensory world for a time.” “How does one do that?” “By temporarily isolating yourself from all visual and auditory stimuli. Think of it as a momentary pause, like an intermission in a play.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   265 Chronos remained skeptical, and Kairos sensed his doubt. “Who has time for this?” Chronos thought. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   266 “When you temporarily shut down everything vying for your attention,” Kairos continued, “you uncover profound truths about what you value, unnec- essary obligations that tie you down, your fears, and what motivates you. Spir- itual fasting strips away your desires and reveals why you are restless.” “I suppose it would also reveal how I spend my time. Does it actually bring me joy? Or am I using my time to escape? Or trying to prove something to others or myself?” “These are crucial questions that are nearly impossible to answer when the mind is busy, which stifles emotional and spiritual growth.” “If spiritual fasting is so important, why don’t more people practice it?” “For the same reason physical fasting is not widely practiced: it's not taught.” “Could you compare spiritual and physical fasting to a reset, similar to en- trainment?” “Exactly.” “How does physical fasting achieve that?” “It helps you realize how certain foods or substances inhibit you.” “I don’t think it ever occurred to me to ask how what I eat could affect how I feel.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 267 Kairosexplained how certain foods can influence one’s mood, sometimes leading to feelings of irritability, impatience, or even moodiness. “I didn’t know that,” Chronos replied. “I know I’ve felt tired after eating, but I can’t recall my mood changing.” “It varies from person to person. For some, starchy foods can affect them both physically and emotionally. Interestingly, some foods may not have an im- pact when eaten alone, but when combined with others, their effects can be significant.” “Significant? How so?” “For instance, if you consume something that makes you irritable, you might say or do things you later regret. Additionally, certain food combinations can disrupt your sleep, while others might leave you feeling lethargic or even depressed. Some combinations can also cause inflammation, leading to physical discomfort that weakens your immune system.” Chronos scratched his head, surprised to learn this now. He had no idea food could affect his well-being so profoundly. “Consider,” Kairos continued, “how women experience hot flashes during menopause. Many don’t realize that avoiding alcohol, sugar, or certain combi- nations like spicy and fatty foods can help alleviate these symptoms.” Chronos laughed. “What’s so funny?” Kairos asked. “My grandmother used to joke that men-o-pause is a time for women to take a 'pause' from men.” Kairos chuckled. “That’s quite amusing. Do you know what menopause means?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 268 “No.” “It comes from Greek. ‘Men’ means month and is the root of the word for moon.” “I didn’t know that.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   269 “Anyway,” Kairos continued, “the reason we’re discussing diet is that any deficiency—whether it’s a vitamin, mineral, or hormonal—can hinder your met- amorphosis.” “How so?” “Just as you can't run a race when you're tired, you can't spiritually evolve if your body is held back by a lack of something. Like I said certain foods can disrupt your rhythm, leaving you tired or edgy.” “I would have never thought that fasting occasionally could be beneficial.” “Spiritual fasting, however, is much harder since most people struggle to be alone, especially in a quiet room. This is even more true for extroverts.” Being an extrovert himself, Chronos wondered why that was the case. He wanted to ask Kairos about it but found himself reflecting on his younger self. “How receptive,” he thought, “would I have been if someone had told me these things in my twenties or thirties?” He concluded that he would likely have ignored it. At that time in his life, he felt invincible. Proving himself to others mattered most, and he believed that success would make his parents proud. Only now did he realize this was his way of gaining their love. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   270 Intuitively, Chronos understood that Kairos was right; still, he could not grasp why part of him continued to resist. He wondered if it was because he felt disappointed in himself. But that wasn’t it. The truth was he blamed the world and others for his unhappiness. Soon, Chronos would discover that his drive to get ahead was only half the problem behind his general dissatisfaction with life. Kairos could sense Chronos struggling. He tried to encourage him by re- minding him that metamorphosis is possible for anyone who desires a good life—a life filled with meaningful relationships. Chronos said nothing as he looked down. Kairos paused, contemplating whether it was the right time to share some- thing he knew would be painful, much like telling someone that their leg must be amputated due to gangrene. “Is it possible,” Kairos said slowly, “that maybe, just maybe, you derived some unexplained comfort from the sad story you’ve been telling yourself and others about how unfair life has been to you?” “That’s harsh!” Chronos said, feeling dejected and misunderstood. “Maybe so,” Kairos replied calmly, knowing it was time to amputate his past. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  271 Kairosexplained to Chronos that anyone who wishes to metamorphosize must be willing to explore the dark recesses of their soul, which sometimes means confronting painful questions—no matter how harsh or self-incriminat- ing. “One’s capacity to love depends on it,” he added. Feeling agitated, Chronos didn’t hear Kairos’ words. He expressed his ina- bility to let go of how he wanted his life to turn out. Rather than remind him they had discussed something similar, Kairos said, “You might think no one can understand how you feel or what you’ve been through—but someone knows your pain. Someone understands exactly how you feel. It's encouraging to remember that others have overcome the same struggles as you. Somehow, they healed from their past, even though they still bear the scars.” Hearing this, Chronos felt more hopeful. “The good news,” Kairos continued, “is that once you accept that metamor- phosis is possible for you, you’ll be surprised at how much lighter your spiritual burden becomes.” “How?” “Because you recognize that there is another way to move through life.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 272 “I would like to believe that,” Chronos said, trying to feel optimistic. Many times in his life, he had looked in a mirror without recognizing him- self. Sometimes he felt like an imposter and would ask, "Who are you?" There was the person he wanted to be all those years ago . . . and the person he had become. But his conversations with Kairos made him question both. Chronos didn’t want to ask whether becoming the person he desired would have made him happy; he just assumed it would. His thoughts were interrupted by Kairos' voice. “It’s encouraging to hear you acknowledge that there could be another way through life. Maybe now is a good time to share something I wanted to speak about earlier.” “What’s that?” “Despair can be alluring when dejection leads you to believe in the impos- sibility of possibilities.” “Is that supposed to be another riddle?” Chronos asked nervously. “No. It only sounds like one because it’s counterintuitive.” “Are you suggesting that people willingly succumb to despair even when they find a way out? If so, that makes no sense. . . . Oh! Wait. Unless you mean that when you feel defeated, you don’t want to believe in the possibility of a way out?” “Because?” asked Kairos. “I guess because you don’t have the strength to keep fighting. Or you be- lieve you’re not worth it. I suppose it’s easier to abandon your aspirations or what you once believed in.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   273 “Yes, but notice this implies you believe this with certainty. You think it’s ‘impossible’ for your future to be any different than it is now. We discussed this earlier, remember?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 274 “I remember. You said the uncertain future produces anxiety.” “That’s right. But it’s not just uncertainty that causes anxiety; it is the fear of the unknown. For example, everyone is certain of one thing, yet it causes the most anxiety.” “What’s that?” “Your impending death.” Chronos took a deep breath through his nose. “Every human at birth,” Kairos said, “is given about 1,000 months to live. Around the 300-month mark—mid-twenties—humans start to decline. Their bodies gradually weaken.” “I wish someone had told me that when I turned twenty.” “Anyone who lives long enough,” Kairos added, “will witness their face transform into a dried-up prune. Life is terminal because everything has a time limit.” After contemplating this further, Chronos said, “Yet we still feel anxious about death even though we know for certain that it is coming.” “Precisely. This reminds me of when you confided in me about the times you felt adrift. You said it felt like treading water in the middle of the ocean.” “Yes. After my dreams sank.” “Many people experience this, but few realize how the weight of uncer- tainty pulls them under until they lose all strength to continue. They drown from fatigue, and sadly, some welcome it.” Chronos was about to speak when he noticed Kairos looking forlorn. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 275 “What is even more vexing is that people don’t know there is a way to stop treading.” “But how?” Chronos asked, recalling the times he felt worn out by life. Sometimes, the desire to die seemed stronger than the desire to live. At that moment, his cynical voice whispered to him, “Walking through this endless forest is no different from the paths you took in life. They were all equally random and unpredictable. It’s all pointless.” Chronos didn’t want to hear this. “You cannot be certain that your way is the only way,” he told the voice. This caused his cynical voice to slither back into the dark recesses of his soul. Thankfully, the soothing sound of Kairos’ voice brought Chronos back to the present. “When you feel you cannot bear to live another day,” Kairos said stoically, “it’s crucial to never forget that it is impossible to know the future with cer- tainty.” “I remember you saying something similar, but it didn’t have the same im- pact as it does now.” Chronos wasn’t sure what Kairos meant by another way to stop treading. Still, he continued to put one foot forward, hoping everything they spoke about would come together as they moved toward their unspoken destination. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   276 Chronoswelcomed a cool breeze brushing against his skin. Kairos recognized that Chronos was trying to maintain a positive outlook, but he was concerned about the inner despair that kept resurfacing. “I need to remind you,” Kairos said, “that the future, your future, can al- ways turn out differently than you imagine, no matter how bad the present is or how hopeless the future seems.” When Chronos heard this, he felt something soften within him, like a knot being released after a massage. “When life capsizes you, you frantically search for a life preserver. This is called hope. In my Tradition, however, we believe hope has become a euphe- mism for waiting it out.” Chronos sighed. “I don’t follow. Waiting for what?” “Waiting to be rescued.” “By?” “Happiness.” “That makes no sense!” “When life is turned upside down, all you want is to return to how things were, or if life is already bad, you dream of being saved. What I’m saying is that waiting it out is like treading water. But of course, this is exhausting until you finally question the point of treading. After all, you might say, everyone dies eventually.” Chronos looked away, as if he didn’t want to hear this. He was becoming increasingly uncomfortable with the conversation. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   277 Kairospressed on. “A moment ago, I mentioned there is another way to stop treading. What I’m about to say may surprise you. The first step when treading is to question the depth of the water.” “Meaning?” “Meaning, perhaps the water isn’t as deep as it seems. Maybe it’s possible to stand up.” Chronos felt exasperated. “I don’t get it!” he said. “If you stood up, you’d be amazed at what you would see.” Chronos couldn’t imagine what this could be. Like everyone else, he knew the feeling of life drowning him in exhaustion. There was a time when he believed all of life conspired against him, and yet Chronos clung to hope. But when hope also sank he desired nothing more than to follow it down and quietly sink into the calmness below the storm. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 278 “Tell me,” Chronos asked in a quiet voice, “what does someone see when they stand up?” Kairos stopped walking to look at Chronos. “To your amazement and relief, you see thousands of people from all walks of life standing motionless in shallow water, gazing at the horizon. What’s even more unusual is that everyone is hold- ing hands.” At first, Chronos found this sentimental. Another part of him felt disap- pointed until he realized he had lived his life hoping to find a panacea, believing that only then would life make sense. For years, he had lived with the fervor of someone terminally ill, hoping for a miracle cure. Feeling defeated, Chronos said, “This is just an allegory. It means nothing.” “No, it’s not an allegory. When you realize that every emotion you’ve ever felt—every pain, every disappointment, and every desire—has been equally felt with the same intensity by someone else—just like you—something profound happens. You begin to see other people differently.” “What do you mean?” Chronos asked, forgetting their previous conversa- tion about the Great Conversation. “You become more graceful and forgiving with yourself.” As soon as Kairos said this, Chronos remembered what he had said before, except this time he felt a part of his identity fall away. It reminded him of a sculptor who chips away at a large stone to reveal something beautiful. Then, Chronos heard Kairos say something that surprised him. “Think of a time when you were ill and promised yourself that if you got better, you would stop letting petty things bother you. You tell yourself you will stop taking things for granted. But not long after your recovery, you forget your promise and find something else to be dissatisfied about.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 279 Chronos acknowledged he had done this, but he had no idea why Kairos was telling him. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   280 “What I hope you see now, Chronos, is that it’s possible to find comfort in knowing you are not alone.” Chronos wondered why he hadn’t been receptive when they discussed this before. “I see now that all my heartache and despair . . . was never unique to me.” Kairos nodded in agreement. “Every generation and culture exists within this eternal return. Poetry has the power to evoke this sentiment, linking the poet’s heart to the reader’s. “Poetry weaves all of life’s glories . . . and pains into a single verse. This is its strength. Its beauty. And its passion. “The poet proclaims: ‘I am you. You are me. Your hopes are my hopes. We desire love but experience loss. We seek peace but feel anxious. We want to be useful yet feel inadequate. We seek security and freedom but find the opposite. We desire justice yet feel powerless. We want to be needed but are rejected. We seek assurance in certainty but feel abandoned by a higher power.’ Chronos listened intently as Kairos grew increasingly solemn, yet still spoke with compassion. “‘Although everyone’s beliefs differ,’ the poet observes, ‘the tears we shed are the same. They come from the same source. Conceived from the same pas- sion. Born from darkness into light, yet lived out in loneliness in search of love. ‘In a thousand years, when everyone alive is long dead—when there are no more wars to fight and no more tears to shed—everyone’s ashes of heartache will be indistinguishable.’” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 281 Like the final ring of a church bell calling people to prayer, the sound of Kairos’ words lingered in the air. Chronos had no words to describe how he felt. After some time, he reflected on his disagreements with others and realized why he rarely listened to them. Kairos recalled the few times he had shared similar thoughts with people outside his Tradition, only to find those sentiments poorly received. People with strong hubris dislike hearing that they are not unique. It is hu- man nature, after all, to believe you are special. This is why hubris often grows alongside the desire to be right and to prove others wrong. To deepen Chronos’ understanding, Kairos offered an illustration. “Imagine,” he said, “that you are on a pilgrimage with many others, climb- ing a challenging mountain path. The mountain is so high that clouds hide the summit. After climbing for most of the day, you want to give up, but then some- thing unexpected happens.” Chronos had never been on a pilgrimage, so it was hard for him to imagine. “When you finally catch your breath, you see, as if for the first time, other pilgrims from around the world. At first, you observe those around you, but soon you notice others higher up the mountain. Then you see pilgrims just be- ginning their journey; they appear so far down they look like ants. In that mo- ment, you experience what is called esprit de corps.” Chronos had heard this expression before; he thought it meant cohesion. “To your amazement,” Kairos continued, “you find strength in this new- found camaraderie. The old you would have sought strength by comparing yourself to those at the bottom, which would have made you feel superior.” “Yes, but only until you compare yourself to those higher up,” Chronos interjected. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  282 “Now, however, having begun your metamorphosis, you possess empathy. You feel a human connection to each pilgrim, who, like you, is trying to find their way. They, too, question their journey and wonder if it’s worth it or if they’ll have the stamina to continue amid uncertainty. What complicates mat- ters is that, since they cannot see the summit, no one knows how far there is still to climb.” Chronos looked stunned. “I think I’ve spent most of my life comparing my- self to others, unable to recognize the similarities in our shared humanity. In- stead, I only saw the differences.” “Now you understand why the ancients referred to the human journey as the way of the pilgrim.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 283 “During your climb, you also discover something new about yourself,” Kairos went on. “What’s that?” “Even though every pilgrim has their own beliefs and idiosyncrasies, eve- ryone experiences the same fatigue and emotions like frustration and grief. At some point every pilgrim will feel they cannot go on. And what is remarkable about your newfound solidarity is how it propels you forward.” “How?” “You now have the strength to persevere because you know others have climbed this same mountain path for centuries. People no different from you.” What Kairos said made Chronos think about his own personal struggles dif- ferently. He tried to remember everyone he met on his life journey, including strangers. And for the first time, he felt their pain acutely. Chronos wondered why he had never felt this way before or, if he had, why it did not affect him so. But it was true. He had believed his pain was not com- parable to others. Chronos stopped walking and stared off into the space be- tween the trees. “It is amazing,” he concluded, “how a minor change in perspective can alter everything. I am reminded of something that happened a long time ago.” “What is it?” “On my way to work I used to walk through a park mid-morning and in the middle of the park there was a giant sculpture, a replica of the Farnese Atlas.” “Atlas, the Titan, who was punished by Zeus and forced to carry the celes- tial sphere on his back?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   284 “Yes.” “Did you know Atlas fought alongside the god Chronos in the Battle of the Titans?” “No, I did not.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 285 “The Battle of the Titans occurred,” Kairos explained, “because Chronos overthrew his father, King Ouranos. Sadly, this story repeats in every generation when time is lost to envy.” Chronos echoed the phrase: “Time lost to envy.” He had never heard it before. Chronos did not see himself as envious, but only because he confused it with jealousy. Envy is the fear of not getting what others have. Jealousy is the fear of losing what you have. Envy stems from perceived lack. Jealousy from perceived loss. Envy breeds resentment, whereas jealousy breeds anger. “Time is lost to envy,” Kairos said, “when discontent turns into inferiority. This leads to envy of others’ happiness when you believe that success equals happiness.” Chronos struggled to keep up. This was a lot to absorb as he wondered if he had confused success with happiness. “Please, continue,” Kairos urged. “What was I saying?” “Walking in the park.” “Right. Anyway, one day I walked past this sculpture as the sun rose, which I had never done before. It was then that I noticed part of the sculpture was translucent. I never looked at it the same way again. The sculpture took on new meaning for me.” “What makes you think of this now?” “I guess because I am often quick to judge others. I tend to see them in a certain light. But then again, most people aren’t transparent.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   286 With a gentle nudge, Kairos encouraged Chronos to keep walking. “Trans- lucence,” he said, “is a metaphor for gaining self-awareness.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   287 Whenthey reached a circular opening in the forest, Chronos immediately halted. “Is that what I think it is?” he asked, staring at a gleaming silver sword em- bedded in a large, solitary rock. “Yes, it is Excalibur.” “The same sword used by King Arthur of Camelot?” “Yes, except the legend you’ve likely heard isn’t the complete story. While Arthur did pull a sword from this rock, it wasn’t Excalibur.” “Why is Excalibur here?” “I cannot tell you precisely, but what I do know is that Merlin brought Ar- thur to a nearby lake called Étang de Comper, where Château de Comper stands on the north shore. It was there that Arthur received Excalibur, an elven-made sword, from Viviane, the Lady of the Lake. As you may recall, Arthur drew great strength from this sword until it was stolen by his half-sister, Morgan le Fay.” “I never knew this story about Excalibur!” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 288 Kairosstopped speaking. He looked directly at Chronos as if to suggest he try to pull the sword from its stone sheath. Chronos felt goosebumps. He had daydreamed about something magical happening if he returned to the forest of Brocéliande, and now, standing before this magnificent sword, he felt a sense of destiny wash over him. As he slowly approached the rock, an energy surged through him, filling him with anticipation for his moment of glory. Like a conquering hero, he paused before placing his hand on the sword’s hilt. He glanced at Kairos, who nodded with the regal air of a king. “Go on,” Kairos urged, “pull hard!” Chronos did so, but nothing happened. He tried again, this time placing one foot on the rock. The sun seemed to shine brighter as the zephyr wind swirled around him. In his mind, he heard a voice urging him to have faith. With both hands gripping the hilt, he summoned all his strength to pull . . . and to his surprise, he fell backward with the sword still lodged in the rock. Lying on his back he looked up at Kairos feeling defeated. “Why did you make me believe I could pull the sword out of the rock?” “I didn’t. I merely suggested you try. I was curious to see if you would ques- tion why you needed such a sword. I hoped you might reflect on your inten- tions.” Chronos felt tricked and tried to hide his embarrassment as Kairos helped him up. He changed the subject by asking how Arthur died. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   289 “King Arthur died at the Battle of Camlann. One account suggests he was defeated because he lacked his trusted Excalibur. Arthur believed he was invin- cible with Excalibur, but when his sword was stolen, he lost faith in his abilities as a warrior.” Kairos sat down on the rock before continuing, resting his back on Excali- bur. “He forgot that Excalibur was merely a tool. It wasn't the sword that em- powered him as a leader; it was his foresight, fortitude, and willingness to listen to counsel. Many make the mistake of seeking strength outside themselves, hop- ing to find security and confidence. Not surprisingly, this is the same reason some follow a religion or fight for an ideology." “How does this apply to me?” Chronos asked. “People can search their entire lives for their own Excalibur. Sometimes, they find it in another person, which creates a dangerous dependency.” “How?” “Well, if that person were to leave, the only emotions they might feel would be rejection and anger, which they unknowingly use to mask their vulnerabil- ity.” In that moment, Chronos realized how his dependency had fueled his past jealousy. However, he still didn't understand why he had become so dependent in the first place. “Come,” said Kairos, “let’s keep walking.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 290 “There’s something I want to revisit regarding the common misconcep- tion that everyone else's life seems more exciting and happier than our own: perceived happiness is never a reliable indicator of a fulfilling life.” “Meaning?” “Some people pretend to be happy.” “That makes no sense.” “It’s easier for the ego to pretend to be happy than to let others know you are lonely or miserable.” “Does this relate to equating happiness with positive outcomes and favora- ble circumstances?” Chronos asked, trying to recall what Kairos had said before. “It does. Think about what makes you happy one day—like an exciting new job, an accomplishment, or a new lover—can make you equally miserable a few months later.” “But not everyone is in the same boat,” Chronos interjected. “Some people navigate life on a luxurious boat, while others must face the same swells and troughs in a tiny one. In this sense, life is easier for the wealthy. It’s only a matter of time before your small boat capsizes.” “There’s some truth to that; however, an easier life is not necessarily a hap- pier life.” At that moment, Chronos recalled someone saying, “The easier life gets, the unhappier people seem to become.” He dismissed the comment because, at that time, he was struggling to be successful in the eyes of others, without ques- tioning why that mattered so much. “It’s true what you said, Chronos. Smaller boats are more likely to capsize since they lack a keel and ballast.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   291 “But?” “Wealthy or famous people,” Kairos said slowly, “jump overboard too when the nausea of existence becomes unbearable.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 292 Chronosknew this was true, but he had never understood why people who seemed to have everything would willfully end their lives. He asked Kairos about this. “There is no simple answer to something so tragic. Sometimes it stems from profound loneliness or shame. Other times, life events hit you like a rogue wave.” “I’ve had a few of those!” Chronos said wistfully. “When experiencing sensory overload, the mind becomes disoriented. This feeling of nausea can cause some people to lose their will to live.” “Isn’t disorientation what seasickness is?” “It is. And in life, it is called despair. You feel trapped by time—over- whelmed and powerless, as if you cannot stop yourself from sinking.” “There’s nothing worse,” Chronos added. “Whether rich or poor, it doesn’t matter what boat you’re in when a cy- clone hits. When the swells and troughs of life become erratic, despair feels the same for everyone.” “What can be done?” asked Chronos. "Even in a storm, there is calm—a peace that can guide you." “Where can this be found?” “If you descend below the water, you’ll discover a quiet calmness as you watch the chaos rage above. This makes it possible to weather any storm.” “Except,” Chronos retorted, “you can’t stay down indefinitely.” “You’re right. But I’m not talking about holding your breath to wait out the storm.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   293 Chronos wasn’t sure what Kairos meant. He wondered how this related to metamorphosis. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 294 Kairossensed that Chronos wanted to know more, so he continued. “To alleviate despair, Sages have long discussed a spiritual practice I men- tioned earlier called sublimation. One notable Sage was Iamblichus, a Syrian philosopher from centuries past. Unfortunately, he’s mostly forgotten.” “Why?” “Have you ever read something meaningful but couldn’t grasp it, so you gave up?” “I have.” “Well, nearly everything Iamblichus wrote was like that, which led people to stop reading him. There’s another reason too.” “What’s that?” “People prefer entertainment. They don’t want to explore deeper questions about themselves. They fear being questioned and resist having their beliefs challenged as much as changing routines. It’s easier to live on the surface. Or so it seems.” Chronos looked at Kairos with a blank stare, reluctant to acknowledge the truth of his words. “Iamblichus wrote a book titled De Mysteriis. In this work, he stated: ‘The powers of the human passions that are in us, when entirely restrained, become more vehement. But when they are called forth into energy, gradually and commensurately, they enjoy moderate relief and find satisfaction; and hence, by becoming purified, they are rendered tractable, and are vanquished without despair or violence. That is why, when we behold the passions of others in both comedy and tragedy, we stabilize our own passions, rendering them more moderate.’” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   295 Chronos laughed. “I have no idea what he’s talking about! I feel my mind drifting far from shore.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 296 Lost in thought Chronos didn’t realize Kairos had led them off the main path. “What Iamblichus is saying is this: when emotions are tethered they grow stronger by morphing into despair, anger, resentment, or conflict. To circum- vent this Iamblichus looked to ancient playwrights, like the tragedies of Sopho- cles or the comedies of Aristophanes.” “I’ve heard of Sophocles but not Aristophanes.” “Like Sophocles he was a Greek playwright, writing in the 5 th century BC. They both influenced Plato and Aristotle.” “I did not know that. Go on, please.” “Before philosophy was born, the ancient Greeks believed that plays served a purpose—to purify intentions.” “How?” “When you connect with a character in a play and see how their bad deci- sions lead to tragic outcomes, you realize this could happen to you too, assum- ing you don’t suffer from hubris.” “Meaning?” “Meaning, arrogance blinds people. It makes them believe they are immune from the human condition or that they don’t need help.” “And how does this relate to sublimation?” Kairos walked slower as the terrain became more challenging. “Think of it this way. Instead of allowing negative experiences or emotions to overpower you, sublimation redirects this energy to refine you toward your own metamorphosis. You could also think of it as reorientation. Many artists The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   297 undergo something similar during their creative process, even if they don’t call it this.” “I’m not sure I follow,” Chronos said as his foot got stuck in a root. “Imagine an artist caught in a current of melancholy. One day, this current brings the artist to an unexpected shore. If the artist doesn’t resist and remains patient, inspiration will return. If, on the other hand, the artist panics and swims against the current, fear will block creativity. The artist needs to trust that inspi- ration will come back when the time is right.” Chronos listened carefully, still trying to understand how this all related to the words of Iamblichus. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 298 Chronos asked if sublimation could be compared to how a lever lifts a heavy object. “This is another useful way to understand sublimation. Negative emotions are periods of contraction in your life; despite being painful, they can be subli- mated for other purposes like your own metamorphosis. Or prompt you, for example, to embark on a new endeavor.” Kairos turned to look at Chronos, who had stopped walking. “What is it?” he asked. “I was thinking about the word contractions.” “Oh! Go on.” “It just occurred to me that without contractions a baby cannot be born.” Kairos smiled. “It is the same with existential contractions. They are a type of rebirth because you emerge from the other end transformed.” “Assuming you don’t resist it,” Chronos added. “Very true. Not everyone wants to be transformed, especially if it involves making radical changes or questioning things about themselves.” “Like?” “Like how you spend your time. But there’s a problem.” “What’s that?” “The human condition. When feeling discontent or restless, humans tend to avoid those feelings by distracting themselves.” “Is this what Iamblichus meant by purifying the human passions?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 299 “Somewhat. Iamblichus tapped into an ancient concept Aristotle discussed called catharsis. Before Aristotle’s time, playwrights wrote in two genres: com- edy and tragedy. They crafted stories to create a cathartic experience, so that when the play ended, you left a changed person—more humble, more refined, more conscious.” “But how?” “As I mentioned before, when you immerse yourse lf in the play, you vicar- iously experience the full range of human emotions. By witnessing the plight of others, you realize you are not alone in your suffering. This helps you gain fore- sight, which can hopefully help you avoid suffering in your own relationships.” “Sounds like preventive medicine,” Chronos said with a half-smile. Kairos laughed. “I never thought of it that way. It’s a good comparison.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  300 “WhereI come from,” Chronos said, “I doubt people would seek cathar- sis.” “Why do you say that?” Kairos asked rhetorically. “People can empathize with characters in a play or book, but hubris or na- ivety leads them to overestimate their abilities.” Kairos looked at Chronos, intrigued. “What do you mean?” “I’m thinking about when young people say, ‘I will never be like my par- ents’ or ‘I will never get divorced.’ It’s as if they believe they are special or that the human condition doesn’t apply to them. When we’re young, we tend to think the misfortunes of others will never happen to us.” After he said this, it occurred to Chronos that metamorphosis must be con- nected to transcending the human condition. He wanted to ask Kairos about this, but a branch struck him across the face. Only then did he realize they had veered off the path. The stinging sensation made Chronos forget his question. As he walked with his hand on his face, he reflected on what Kairos had said. He then thought about their earlier conversation about diving below the water to escape the turmoil above to find a moment of peace. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 301 Theunmarked path they walked grew denser. Chronos sweated as he strug- gled both physically and mentally to keep up. “You were speaking earlier about the artistic process of creation,” Chronos said. “I lost track of what you were saying when you mentioned catharsis.” “Something interesting happens,” Kairos explained, “when an artist be- comes too comfortable on their new shore. One day, the artist’s inspiration runs dry again. But instead of succumbing to worry—thinking that creativity is lost forever—the artist accepts this new rhythm as part of the spiral process of crea- tivity. Expansion requires contraction, and sometimes that means getting stuck.” “What does the artist do?” asked Chronos. “The artist will venture into the unknown sea again, even though the cur- rent may take the artist far from the comfort and certainty of the shore.” Chronos breathed heavily. “This reminds me of what you said about set- backs, which I suppose is another form of contraction. I guess this too is life’s way of humbling us.” Kairos nodded as he lifted a cluster of hanging vines for Chronos. “When we’re hurting,” Kairos said, “there’s nothing more difficult than voicing pain.” “What do you mean?” “Sometimes pain is so overwhelming it feels like a bomb has exploded nearby. When this happens you momentarily lose your hearing. You feel like a wounded soldier on a battlefield, waiting for your mates to bring you to safety. You are too weak, so you lean on them to carry you off. This is what friends do.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 302 “But when you apply this to everyday life not everyone is humble enough to ask,” Chronos added softly. Kairos nodded. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  303 Asthey made their way through the dense foliage, Chronos realized it was still unclear where Kairos was heading with their previous discussion. He then shared his concerns with Kairos about remembering everything they had discussed. Not only that, how would he put all the pieces together? The experience felt like discovering an ancient ruin that had crumbled in an earthquake and then attempting to reconstruct it. “If you had to venture deep into a jungle and eventually return to the same spot, what would you do?” Kairos asked. “I would mark the trees and remember distinct landmarks, like this large protruding rock here.” “This is how you navigate everything we’ve discussed. Of course, once you walk the trail a few times, you won’t need markers.” Chronos found this visual helpful but was unsure how to apply it. “Listening to wisdom literature isn’t the same as reading it,” he thought. “I can’t underline everything that resonates with me to revisit later.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   304 “When I was young,” Kairos said, “and just learning about metamorpho- sis, my mentor warned me that my thirst for knowledge would erode my spirit. Back then, I believed life’s problems could be solved rationally. One day, she sat me down and said, ‘Humble yourself before life does it for you.’ She did not want me to gain wisdom only through hardship.” It was true, Chronos thought. Most of his wisdom came from hardship. He asked Kairos what else his mentor had shared. Kairos smiled nostalgically. “I just remembered something I haven’t thought about in years.” “What’s that?” “With her piercing blue eyes, she looked at me saying, ‘The humbling of humanity is life’s whip.’” “That’s it?” Chronos asked in disbelief. Kairos laughed as they both slipped on the crumbling earth beneath them. “She cloaked her words to entrain my spirit. In fact, it would be years before I learned the true meaning of humility.” “How old were you?” “I was a teenager.” Chronos chuckled. “Well, that explains it.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 305 “Humility,” she explained, “comes from the Latin word humus, mean- ing earth. At first, I found this connection strange. She then described how a spiral curves around a fixed point. ‘If your spirit does not revolve around a fixed point,’ she said, ‘you will be pulled from the orbit of your soul and become distant from yourself.’” Chronos listened intently, yearning for a fixed point to provide direction. Kairos held a branch to prevent it from snapping back as Chronos walked by. He noticed Kairos’s distant gaze. “What happened?” Chronos asked. “It wasn’t long after that I abandoned my quest for certainty. I grounded myself in humility, which made me a better listener.” “I’m not sure I understand.” “Like an axe splitting wood, I detached myself from pride. Have you not noticed that the more certain you are, the more smug you become?” Chronos nodded in agreement. “To my surprise,” Kairos continued, “I uncovered a profound insight about life. Yet, it took me many years to appropriate it.” Chronos was about to ask what Kairos meant until he saw him walking gingerly, as if he noticed something ahead. “The insight I gained,” Kairos said in a hushed voice, “is that the Earth and all of nature move in rhythmic patterns, including the human journey. This rhythm is ever-changing, but nature has a way of restoring harmony, even among humans, if they cease resisting. This is how the human spirit refines it- self.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  306 “I don’t think there’s anything more humbling than aging,” Chronos said with a sad smile. “Growing old, my friend, is just another form of metamorphosis.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   307 Kairosreached out to stop Chronos from moving. He made a shushing gesture while pointing ahead. They paused between two trees to remain concealed. Chronos was amazed by what he saw. A few yards away stood a magnificent Elaphe deer, larger than any he had ever encountered. This was the same stag Kairos had sensed before they ven- tured down this path. They stood motionless, watching. “Wandering off your chosen path,” Kairos whispered, “creates kairos op- portunities to discover things you might otherwise miss. Resisting life’s currents to stay where you are is the opposite of metamorphosis.” Chronos marveled at the deer as it grazed peacefully. Kairos was not wrong. The challenge of the off-path terrain was worth the effort to witness this majestic animal and its impressive antlers. He was intrigued by how gracefully the stag moved while remaining alert to potential predators. Just as Chronos thought this, the deer glanced at them, flicked its ears, and swiftly vanished into the dense forest. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  308 “Come,” Kairos said, “Let’s return to the main path.” As they walked back, Chronos continued to reflect on humility. He asked Kairos why people weren’t more humble. “The simple answer is that humans are not born this way,” Kairos replied. “In many cultures, humility is viewed as a sign of weakness, even though it takes great courage to be humble.” Chronos nodded in agreement. “And yet,” Kairos added solemnly, “have you noticed that those who lack humility are often the least happy?” Chronos paused for a moment, surprised by this insight. He told Kairos that this couldn’t be the only reason for unhappiness. “True, but a lack of humility is often associated with depression.” Chronos remained skeptical, still wondering why he felt resistance. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 309 Asif reading his thoughts, Kairos said, “The irony is that people can easily detect pride in others but not in themselves. Even more surprising is that when they hear about the connection between pride and unhappiness, few consider whether it applies to them.” “Why is that?” “Sometimes it stems from the belief that one is sufficient unto oneself.” “Sufficient?” “Humans tend to resist relying on each other for growth. They prefer ad- miration. They prefer to go with the flow rather than question its direction.” “Are you saying a lack of humility leads people to believe they are self-suf- ficient?" “Yes.” “And this is why your tradition values metamorphosis?” “Yes. People often believe their self-worth is tied to achievements that grant them status or power, which is where they find confidence. What is less obvious is the subconscious desire to be better than others, making it a weakness to ask for help.” “But would you not agree,” Chronos interrupted, “that not everyone who is overconfident is pretentious?” “Of course. Not everyone who lacks humility is pretentious. Confidence and humility are not mutually exclusive; one can be both humble and confi- dent.” “I see.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   310 “My point is only that those who exhibit hubris do not see themselves as such, so they feel no need to metamorphosize until life knocks them down. Un- fortunately, those who lack humility the most often experience recurring bouts of depression.” Chronos realized this could be why he was resisting—it was difficult to ad- mit that his depression might stem from his lack of humility, or what Kairos was calling hubris. “Strangely,” Kairos added, “after each recovery from depression, hubris tends to grow stronger.” Chronos was stunned by the revelation. He then protested, “But surely not everyone who suffers from depression does so because of a lack of humility.” “You’re absolutely right. Grief is a prime example.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 311 Thelast conversation left Chronos drained. He was not accustomed to such discussions, yet he wanted to know more. Something was weighing on him. He hesitated to speak about it until he found the strength to voice his thoughts. “Do you think my lack of humility explains my unhappy relationships?” Kairos paused before responding. He admired Chronos’ courage in asking this difficult question. “Well,” he began slowly, “given everything you’ve shared with me, I be- lieve this could be one reason. In my Tradition, we believe loneliness increases when insecurity is combined with a lack of humility.” Chronos felt his mind spinning. He could not accept that his loneliness or his marriage breakups had anything to do with his lack of humility. This made no sense. “It is important to remember,” Kairos continued, “that everyone has a seed of hubris planted within them, and just as there are degrees of hubris, there are many words to describe it, even though they differ.” “Like?” “I can think of many: needy, opinionated, self-absorbed, stubborn, over- bearing, prideful, entitled, smug, insensitive, vain, self-righteous, boastful . . .” Chronos laughed, waving his hand at Kairos. “Alright, alright, I get it!” Kairos smiled. “These words describe various manifestations of hubris, but given the nature of hubris, few people will ever admit to any of them.” Chronos said nothing. He was reluctant to acknowledge that Kairos was right. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  312 “Hubris is part of the human condition. It has wreaked havoc on Earth. It is the cause of war and creates inequality. It is the origin of oppression and, in its wake, brings death and destruction. Hubris is the destroyer of marriages.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 313 “Ifthis is true,” Chronos wondered, “why isn’t hubris more commonly rec- ognized?” “That’s a good question, but I don’t have an answer. Even if people are familiar with the word they won’t acknowledge which adjective applies to them until . . .” “Until what?” “Until they see a pattern in their broken relationships or realize how quickly they become defensive.” Chronos was surprised by Kairos’ newfound fervor. The more he reflected on hubris, the slower he walked. It struck him as almost comical that the essence of hubris is to deny its existence. He told Kairos it was unclear how all the words he used to describe hubris were connected. “They all have something in common,” Kairos replied. “And what’s that?” “Insecurity.” “That’s not possible. Are you saying that everyone who is insecure or lacks confidence does so because of hubris?” “No. But remember, there’s a difference between a lack of confidence and insecurity, just as there is with low self-esteem.” Chronos wasn’t sure about these distinctions. “Don’t you think insecurity is common to everyone?” he asked. “Yes, to varying degrees. However, insecurity isn’t necessarily bad if you allow it to humble you.” “That sounds counterintuitive.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   314 “Cultivating humility,” Kairos said slowly, “is a powerful way to overcome insecurity.” “How?” “Because you realize you have nothing to prove to anyone.” Chronos felt a knot in his stomach. He wanted to change the subject, but Kairos quickened his pace, realizing it would be dark soon. “We must find shelter before sunset,” Kairos said firmly. Chronos was confused, as Kairos appeared anxious. “No one outside my Tradition survives at night in the forest of Brocéliande, especially under a full moon, which will be tomorrow.” The fatigue Chronos had felt from the conversation was now replaced by anxiety. He didn’t want to know what Kairos meant. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 315 Whenthey returned to the path, Chronos felt he could concentrate better. He no longer worried about a branch swinging back and hitting him in the face except now he couldn’t stop thinking about where they would sleep. “I have something to share with you,” Kairos said, “that I couldn't tell you earlier.” “Why?” “Because I didn’t think you were ready. However, I must warn you that what I’m about to say may not make sense at first because it will sound para- doxical.” “What is it?” “A Sage from the collective wisdom once said, ‘Hubris counterbalances un- happiness.’” “You’re right. That doesn’t make sense.” After a moment, Chronos added, “I thought hubris was just another word for arrogance.” “Not quite. Arrogance conveys a sense of superiority. Arrogant people lack humility and empathy. However, arrogance doesn't always stem from insecu- rity or low self-esteem. Some people genuinely believe they are superior. Like moths to a flame, humans are drawn to power.” “Not all.” “No, not all.” “Are you saying that arrogance comes from hubris, but not all hubristic people are arrogant?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 316 “Correct. Hubris is excessive self-confidence mixed with pride, but it doesn’t always manifest in every area of life. For example, a Greek Olympian could be overconfident in his ability to win, yet humble in other aspects of life.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 317 The sunlight waned as they ventured deeper, casting long shadows that danced across the ground, as if the forest itself were alive with stories waiting to be told. As Chronos reflected on their last conversation, he couldn’t determine if hubris was a way to compensate for low self-esteem, insecurity, or lack of con- fidence. If it was, he had not been aware of it. But there was another thing he was confused about: he was unsure of the difference between insecurity and low self-esteem. “Would you say,” he asked, “hubris is used as a protective shell?” Kairos felt relieved to hear Chronos ask this. His curiosity was growing stronger than his cynical voice. “You could compare hubris to a protective shell, but it is fragile. People safeguard this shell by becoming defensive, confrontational, or stubborn.” Chronos recalled a time in his youth when he never felt good enough. It only now occurred to him that his ambition back then was to make a name for himself. “Was this hubris?” he wondered. “But what does it even mean to ‘make a name’ for oneself?” This thought led Chronos to reflect on his neglectful father, overbearing mother, and the societal pressures he faced to excel. “Was this why I wanted to prove myself? Or was it my desire to earn my mother’s love?” Chronos remembered her always saying, “Make me proud!” Despite the negative impact of his childhood he always believed he could escape his parents' influence. Yet he still wanted to exceed their expectations. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   318 No matter what he accomplished, it was never good enough for them or him- self. He kept wanting more and more without ever asking why. As Chronos struggled to keep up with Kairos he realized the fatigue he felt was not physical but spiritual. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 319 “If you were stranded on a deserted island,” Kairos asked, “do you think you would still feel insecure?” “I would certainly feel scared and alone, but I don’t think I would feel inse- cure. However, if I had low self-esteem, I would probably lack confidence in my ability to survive.” As Chronos reflected further, he realized that low self-esteem must stem from feelings of inadequacy. “Is this related to feeling unworthy of love or respect?” he wondered. “If so, could this be the root of my own insecurity and self-doubt?” In that moment, Chronos had an epiphany. Throughout different times in his life, he noticed how insecurity and low self-esteem drove him to seek valida- tion and recognition. “Is this another reason people seek constant affirmation or reassurance?” he asked himself. When Kairos saw Chronos walking more slowly, he knew he was deep in thought. He continued at his own pace to give Chronos space to reflect. Chronos's inner dialogue made him realize that insecurity or low self-es- teem might cause some people to become perfectionists with obsessive tenden- cies, like his first wife. “Was this why she was so manipulative?” Chronos asked. “Perhaps, with- out realizing it, she was trying to compensate for her insecurity while appearing confident. And maybe by controlling others, she sought to counter her own lack of control.” Chronos had no idea if this was true, but he found it intriguing that his hubris blamed his former wife for their marital problems. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 320 Whatever the truth, Chronos knew that low self-esteem was like a perva- sive fog that followed him everywhere. “But why?” he asked himself. Chronos didn’t want to blame his parents, or childhood experiences with bullies, but he couldn’t help but wonder if they played a part. “And if this was the origin of my low self-esteem, what about my insecurity? Had I convinced myself that I lacked value because of my parents’ absence, both physically and emotionally?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   321 ToChronos, insecurity felt temporary and acute, similar to the fear of public speaking or social anxiety. However, he believed that, unlike low self-esteem, fear could be overcome with practice. Still, he thought, insecurity must be related to low self-esteem since both feelings can make one feel inadequate. “Is this where the fear of rejection or judgment comes from?” he wondered. Just then, his internal thoughts were interrupted by Kairos. “People with strong hubris tend to deflect responsibility and cannot even listen to alternative perspectives that challenge their beliefs.” Chronos nodded in agreement and asked Kairos why this happens. “Because, subconsciously, it’s a way for people to protect their identity. When your self-worth is tied to your identity, you’ll do anything to preserve it.” Chronos wished for greater clarity. It seemed that every time he grasped a concept, Kairos would take him down another rabbit hole. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 322 Despitethese insights, Chronos remained skeptical of all the words Kairos lumped together to describe hubris. He did not see himself as a narcissist who bragged about his accomplish- ments or name-dropped to feel special and accepted. Still, he wondered if hubris had held him back over the years or, as Kairos suggested, affected his relationships. The more he thought about it, the clearer the answer became. His hubris— when it manifested as overconfidence or excessive pride—blinded him to his own flaws and limitations. He acknowledged to Kairos that his hubris made him defensive and some- times led him to deflect responsibility. What troubled him was that he was unaware he was doing this. Still, he wasn’t convinced that hubris was a form of self-protection. When Chronos caught up with Kairos, he shared his thoughts. “It just struck me that my hubris led me to misinterpret sincere feedback as criticism, which only made me defensive.” “Like a three-ring circus,” Kairos added, “low self-esteem, insecurity, and lack of confidence reinforce each other. A setback, for example, decreases self- confidence and increases insecurity. Together, they diminish self-esteem.” “I keep asking myself where these emotions came from. I suppose it’s easier to blame my parents, circumstances, and others for my unhappiness.” “The origin of these emotions is complex,” Kairos said. “Everyone has cer- tain personality traits, like confidence, but upbringing can either enhance or di- minish these traits. And, of course, societal and cultural pressures play a role.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 323 Whatever the cause, Chronos admitted his hubris contributed to his lack of foresight, poor decision-making, and even laziness, like when he procrastinated. “Is hubris the only reason people who are passionate about their beliefs be- come argumentative?” “Not necessarily. If you defend your beliefs, you clearly believe they are true. This isn’t hubris. However, when your beliefs—or the cause you fight for—give you a will to live and shape your identity, you become defensive like someone with strong hubris.” “It seems hubris sneaks in like an uninvited guest,” Chronos said. Kairos nodded. “People say they want the truth, but what they really want is to be right.” Chronos took a deep breath. “Why can’t life be simpler?” he asked himself. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   324 Even though Chronos was reluctant to continue the conversation, he couldn’t shake off something Kairos had said. He didn’t understand how it was possible to be both overconfident and in- secure at the same time. “Consider,” Kairos said, “how blind people have enhanced hearing. Just as the body compensates physically, the spirit does the same. For some, overcon- fidence shields insecurities; for others, it boosts self-esteem even though they still harbor feelings of inadequacy or self-doubt.” “I find it strange that I never noticed this before. Maybe I was afraid to un- derstand myself more deeply, or perhaps I feared that the identity I created would shatter.” “It is frightening to fall down the proverbial rabbit hole without knowing where you will end up.” Chronos nodded. “This is why periods of contraction in your life should not be dismissed. They are your teachers. When life breaks you open and everything falls apart, you discover things about yourself you never knew. You find out who you really are. This creates humility. And in humility, you find yourself . . . and when you find yourself . . . you find beauty.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   325 Chronoswas growing weary of the conversation. “Are we almost there?” he asked, feeling like a child. “Not much longer,” Kairos reassured him. “Now, before we close this con- versation, there’s one more thing I need to discuss.” “Well,” Chronos said with a laugh, “since we’re already deep in the rabbit hole, we might as well keep going! Every hole must have an exit.” Kairos smiled. “Another manifestation of insecurity is a subconscious desire to prove one- self to the world. In my Tradition, we believe this tendency is another facet of the human condition. Think of children who constantly seek affirmation. Par- ents provide it willingly until they realize their child won’t do anything alone unless recognized or praised.” Chronos wasn’t sure what to make of this. But if this was true, it would explain why adults continuously seek affirmation and attention. “I assume,” he asked, “you’re not suggesting parents stop encouraging their children?” “No. It’s about being aware of extremes, like too much praise or too little.” “I think now is a good time,” Chronos said with a smirk, “to come out of the rabbit hole.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 326 Theywalked silently for a while. When Kairos sensed Chronos would be receptive again, he continued. “Imagine someone holding a sieve and pouring water into it. You would assume this person is trying to wash it, not fill it.” “Of course.” “Some people live their entire lives this way.” “You mentioned the sieve metaphor before.” “I did. It powerfully illustrates what keeps people busy and why time slips through their fingers. Everything they pour their lives into is just a way to get ahead. Yet, nothing holds. Nothing binds. Nothing sticks. Everything flows through them.” Chronos stopped walking. This time the sieve metaphor struck him. He rested his hand on a tree, only to swiftly remove it. Kairos tried not to laugh as Chronos wiped the sap from his pants. “You see, if you do things only to be noticed, boost your self-esteem, or escape your restless heart and loneliness, then every new experience will drip through you.” “It seems so obvious now,” Chronos said half-heartedly. “Grasping for more time to fill your time so you can pass the time is as crazy as trying to fill a sieve with water.” When Chronos looked up at the setting sun, he wondered, “Where did the day go?” When he glanced at Kairos, he added with a blank stare, “Where did my life go?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   327 This last question haunted him. “How many days,” he asked himself, “do I have left until my own life sets for the last time?” The question of how best to use his time felt more urgent than ever. He felt a deep ache in his heart but was also encouraged by the idea of metamorphosis. “Imagine,” Kairos said, “if young people didn’t believe they had all the time in the world. Imagine if they asked how best to use their time instead of asking this when life is nearly over.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 328 Kairoscould see that Chronos needed a break, but they had to keep mov- ing. He was still concerned they were being followed. To encourage him, Kairos said they were close to where they would stop for the night. Chronos said nothing as he watched the shadows lengthen around him. It was hard to concentrate with his stomach rumbling. Besides, he couldn’t stop thinking about what Kairos had said earlier. What did he mean that nobody outside his Tradition survives at night in the forest of Brocéliande? “Before we stop,” he heard Kairos say, “there’s one more thing I need to discuss about insecurity. It relates to uncertainty and how uncertainty breeds fear.” “Fear of what?” “It’s not fear of one thing. It could be fear of being perpetually unhappy, fear of losing what makes you happy, or fear of being inadequate. All these fears, and others like them, are about the future. The future makes one feel powerless and smothers joy. Naturally, no one wants to feel this way, and for many, the only option is to suppress these feelings or find substitutes for them.” “You make it sound like humans are born insecure. Is that what you’re say- ing?” Chronos asked. “That’s difficult to answer. Let me ask you this: Do you think humans have a natural desire to be perceived as special, to stand out?” “It seems so.” “Consider the history of social hierarchy. It has always existed. Even among slaves, there is a hierarchy. History has repeatedly shown how people, cultures, The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   329 and countries compete against one another, each believing themselves to be su- perior in some way.” “But why?” Chronos asked, thinking about people who sacrifice their lives for a tyrant. “The desire to be superior compensates for something a person lacks.” “And this is the origin of insecurity?” “It can be. Imagine, for example, that you feel unloved.” “Anyone who has lived long enough doesn’t need to imagine that!” “You’re right, but if you feel unworthy, you will subconsciously seek atten- tion from others.” “I don’t follow. How would this make one feel more loved?” “It doesn’t. Although it fills a void, it makes you feel good even though it doesn’t alleviate depression or loneliness. All it does is keep you stuck.” “How?” “If a person yearns to be distinct, to stand out, or to be better than others— because they have something to prove—then the idea of metamorphosis won’t make sense. In other words, if you depend on others to feel good about yourself, you will draw strength from that.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   330 Chronoswondered if the innate desire to dominate and feel superior was the source of patriarchy. He thought the family structure spilled over into soci- ety as everyone vied for authority to control others. “You must realize,” Kairos said, “that humans also have a natural desire to be useful and needed. They go astray when they confuse being useful with being wanted.” Chronos gestured for Kairos to pause. He was having difficulty following. “Can you give me an example?” he asked. “Yes, like when the impulse to be useful is not motivated by love. Even in the absence of love, humans still want to be useful and have value; however, without love grounding this desire, it morphs into wanting to be special.” Chronos was still confused. “What I’m trying to say is that without love in one’s life, insecurity and pride fuel the desire to prove oneself by seeking recognition through accom- plishments. This is the hidden drive behind hierarchy, including one-upman- ship.” “Because it makes one feel special?” “Exactly. Remember, people who seek power or try to control others do so to compensate for something they lack. Another way to achieve the same end is to do something significant. This also creates the illusion of being better than others when you feel acknowledged and admired. Regardless, these tendencies explain why metamorphosis is often dismissed as superfluous until loneliness leads to a condition called horror vacui.” “I still don’t see how these tendencies cause people to dismiss metamorpho- sis," Chronos said, wondering what horror vacui meant. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   331 “Once someone finds their will to live in prestige, for instance, they draw strength from it,” Kairos explained. “When this happens, people feel no impulse to grow spiritually. It’s no surprise that the etymology of prestige means illu- sion.” “I didn’t know that. What does horror vacui mean?” Kairos stopped walking and crouched down, digging a hole in the dirt be- side a magnolia bush. Bemused, Chronos knelt to watch. As he did, his nose brushed against a petal. The aroma of the magnolia bush had soft floral under- tones that were soothing. While Kairos picked up a flat rock to deepen the hole, he explained that horror vacui is a Latin expression meaning nature abhors a vacuum. “When the soul is empty of love,” he said, “a vacuum is created—much like the one I’m creating here in the ground.” As Chronos watched muddy water trickle in, he repeated the phrase in his mind: “When the soul is empty of love, a vacuum is created.” “Without love, something will always fill the void in one’s heart. It could be anything from erratic sex to notoriety, money, power, attention, control, or addiction.” Chronos felt his mind stretching in every direction, like someone being drawn and quartered. With a blank stare, he watched the hole slowly fill with more water. For a moment, he wished he could travel back in time and speak to his younger self. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   332 Soon,their path led to an enchanting enclave with an octagon-shaped hut that seemed to emerge from the forest with its moss-covered roof. The house featured four round windows and a large triangular door. “What is this place?” asked Chronos. “Every season, I come here for a week-long retreat.” “What do you do?” “I listen… to silence.” Chronos found the idea of listening to silence strange but said nothing. It wasn’t something he would ever want to do, much less for a week. Yet, as he contemplated the emptiness within, he asked himself, “Why not?” “You are the only person I’ve brought here. This hut was built by my grand- father. We’ll sleep here tonight. Darkness is coming, and it’s dangerous to be outside in the forest of Brocéliande at night.” “Why?” Chronos asked, now feeling nervous. Kairos didn’t hear him; he had already entered the house. He quickly re- turned with a pot. “Take this and fill it with water. There’s a small creek over there,” he said, pointing west. “Meanwhile, I’ll look for some herbs to make us tea and start preparing dinner.” As Chronos made his way, he realized how hungry he was. He thought this was an apt metaphor for life: when you’re preoccupied, you forget to nourish your soul. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   333 Bythe time Chronos returned, Kairos had a fire lit in a small cast-iron stove. He took the pot from Chronos and added water to a cauldron and a kettle. Then he placed some herbs he had collected earlier from the garden into the kettle and added vegetables to the cauldron. “It looks like I need more branches for the fire,” Kairos said. “Would you mind grabbing some?” Chronos stepped outside as Kairos handed him a shawl. He was surprised by how crisp the air was. “Please do it quickly. It will be dark soon,” Kairos said, closing the door. As Kairos began cutting vegetables for the stew, he recalled the three times today he felt the presence of something or someone following them. He quickly opened the door. “Please hurry,” he shouted. Chronos didn’t respond. While searching for branches, Chronos hadn’t realized how far he had wan- dered from the hut. When he lost sight of it, panic set in. At that moment, his hair stood up on the back of his neck as he sensed something watching him. He wanted to run back to the hut but wasn’t sure which way to go. He took a deep breath, trying to remember the way back. His heart pounded when he heard a rustling sound in a nearby bush. The wind momentarily died down, and the forest fell quiet. Thankfully, he heard Kairos’ voice calling for him. Feeling relieved and with branches in hand, he followed the sound of his voice. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 334 Ashe approached the hut, Chronos saw Kairos standing at the entrance. “Come quickly,” Kairos urged, gesturing for him to close the door. Chronos stood by the fire to warm his hands but was startled by a loud clunk. He turned to see that Kairos had secured the door with an oversized latch. “Please, have a seat in this rocking chair,” Kairos said nervously, relieved to be safe inside. Chronos was surprised to see a large bowl of salad on the table, the space illuminated by candles. Chronos watched Kairos pour tea into wooden-handled cups. “This will warm you up while we wait for the vegetable stew to cook.” “This is delicious. What is it?” “The tea comes from India. I’ve boiled it with jasmine, rose petals, mari- gold, and blackberry leaves.” As Chronos enjoyed his tea, he noticed the sparse furnishings. In the corner, he spotted a flute and smiled, recalling Kairos playing it when they first met. As they drank their tea, both felt relieved to be in front of the fire after a long day of walking. They sat in silence, gazing into the flames. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 335 Afterfinishing his tea, Kairos stood up and placed a pair of wooden bowls and forks on the table. “Come, join me,” he said. In the center of the room, an ancient wooden table stood before the wood stove. Chronos pulled out the wooden bench opposite Kairos and sat down. Be- fore they began their meal, Kairos took Chronos' hands and paused for a mo- ment of silence. Then, in Welsh, he offered a prayer of thanksgiving. Once the prayer was complete, Kairos served Chronos a salad. As he did so, Chronos asked if he believed everyone humbles with age. “In degrees,” Kairos replied. “Humans mainly learn through trial and error. This is why older people tend to be wiser and make better grandparents than parents. However, it's unwise to rely solely on age for wisdom. Consider how many parents emotionally scar their children—not because they are bad parents, but because they fail to see child-rearing as a temporary, rhythmic shift in their lives. As a result, they miss out on fully embracing this beautiful kairos oppor- tunity, leaving them torn about how best to use their . . . ” “Time,” Chronos said, finishing his sentence. Kairos nodded slowly. “Some parents believe they have more important things to do, just as their parents did. They don’t consider what their grown children might say when asked, ‘What were your parents like? Did you have a good childhood?’” “I think many people, myself included, believe they are more evolved than their parents.” “Don’t you think that’s to be expected?” “Why?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  336 “Young children idealize their parents until they become teenagers. They struggle to see their parents as ordinary people trying to find their way like eve- ryone else.” Chronos had never had children, though he often pondered what kind of father he might have been. His own father was always busy working, and when his mother was around, he often felt like an inconvenience. Looking back on his childhood, he sometimes felt like just another obligation to them. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  337 Theconversation prompted Chronos to reflect on how listening to his par- ents bicker had affected his own relationships. “This may sound like an odd question,” Chronos began, “but where can wisdom be found in relationships?” “What do you mean?” “A person can possess intellectual wisdom, but what about wisdom specifi- cally in relationships?” “Wisdom in relationships can only be discovered when the desire for it is awakened.” “Why is that?” Chronos inquired. “Hubris leads you to believe you are already wise. It makes you selfish with your time and hinders relationships from flourishing by making people poor lis- teners.” “Now that you mention it, that seems obvious,” Chronos acknowledged. “Have you forgotten what it was like to be a teenager?” Kairos chuckled. “Teenagers often think they know everything, so they ignore the advice of their parents and elders.” Chronos began to wonder if hubris explains unhappiness. “Temporal selfishness ruins every relationship. That’s why we strive in my Tradition to teach our young people about the Way.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   338 Kairosstood up to stir the stew and add more spices. “I think it’s ready,” he said, reaching for the bowls on the table. He handed Chronos some matches to light the candles. As he did this, Chronos felt the evening chill seeping through the walls but found comfort in the aroma of the hot stew. Kairos sat down and waited for Chronos to finish lighting the candles. “The stew smells delightful,” Chronos remarked after lighting the last can- dle. “Enjoy,” Kairos said before taking his first bite. The stew was simple and earthy—exactly what Chronos' famished body craved. After a few more bites, he paused to speak to Kairos. “I’ve been meaning to ask you something,” he said. “What is it?” “You’ve mentioned the Way many times, and I thought I understood it, but I never asked you to explain the way toward what?” “I’ve been waiting for that question,” Kairos said with a smile before taking another hearty mouthful. “I didn’t explain it earlier because there were certain things you needed to hear first; otherwise, you might not have been receptive. Before I tell you, I think you’ll find it interesting that my Tradition is not the only one that speaks of the Way. In fact, the Way is referenced in many spiritual traditions.” This revelation piqued Chronos’ curiosity even more. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   339 Chronosglanced around nervously as the hut began to shake. The howl- ing wind intensified, and with each gust, he felt more cold seeping through the cracks in the wooden walls. He was grateful for the warmth of the stew. When the cacophony of the whistling wind subsided, Kairos continued speaking. “You've likely heard of the Way in the Bible,” he explained. “Jesus tells his disciples there are two ways through life. One way is broad and requires little effort.” “And the other?” Chronos asked, forgetting the biblical passage. “The other way,” Jesus said, “is narrow, yet it leads to a more fulfilling life. Few are those who find it.” Chronos was curious about why so few discover it, but Kairos pressed on. “The Buddha said, ‘Those who have understood the Way are at peace; their thoughts are peaceful, their words are peaceful, and their actions are peaceful.’ “There is another tradition called Taoism. You may not be familiar with its teachings, but you probably know the Yin-Yang symbol. This symbol comes from an ancient text titled Tao Tê Ching, attributed to the founder of Taoism, Lao Tzu. The title is sometimes translated as The Book of the Way. Interest- ingly, for Lao Tzu, the Way is represented as an expression of motherhood. Many mystical writers use feminine imagery to convey their messages.” “I’ve seen the Yin-Yang symbol before, but you’re right; I know nothing about Taoism.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 340 “One of its earliest teachers was a Sage named Lie Yukou, whose teachings are recorded in one of Taoism’s most significant texts, the Liezi. This is what he tells his disciples: ‘Those in the prime of their beauty and strength are proud. They are im- petuous and make hasty decisions. You cannot talk to them about the Way. People without white streaks in their hair go astray when they hear about the Way, and even more so when they attempt to follow it. If a man is proud and impulsive, no one shares wisdom with him because he believes he knows better. Without guidance, he is left alone, lacking support to keep him steady.’” Chronos listened intently, feeling a pang of disappointment in himself for not heeding the advice of his elders when he was a young man. “Even though this text is over a thousand years old,” Kairos remarked, “it’s remarkable how little human relationships have changed. The same drama un- folds ad nauseam across every generation and culture. This used to baffle me, but not anymore.” “Why not?” Chronos asked. “I’ve seen a haze descend over people's eyes when they first encounter Lie Yukou’s teachings. They fail to grasp the depth of these insights and quickly forget them.” “Why?” Chronos inquired, uncertain if he fully understood. “Because the Way is indeed narrow. Few are willing to pause in their busy lives to consider that there could be another path. That’s why I approach dis- cussions of the Way differently when speaking to those outside my Tradition.” “How?” Chronos asked, wondering again why Kairos was investing so much time with him. He was not someone important. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   341 “Imagine the power you could wield in your life if you could maintain your composure, understand your intentions, worry less about the opinions of oth- ers, and act with foresight. What if the troubles that trouble you now would bother you less because . . . . they matter less? What if you could experience more vibrancy and less dullness because you view life as a series of kairos op- portunities rather than monotonous tasks?” Chronos inhaled deeply, yearning for this transformation. “The reason most people overlook the Way is that they suffer from spiritual myopia.” “Remind me what myopia means.” “Imagine observing your life through a keyhole,” said Kairos. Chronos wasn’t sure what he meant until he remembered that myopia re- lates to being short-sighted. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 342 Chronosexpressed that he was still struggling to understand the mean- ing of the Way. After a few sips of his stew, he asked if it could be explained in a single sentence. Kairos looked surprised. No one had asked him this before. “A single sentence cannot capture the Way, but it can be visualized. We discussed this, remember?” “Yes, you said the Way follows a spiral path.” Kairos nodded. “All humans move through time in a spiral formation. It is the way toward self-awareness, self-realization, and self-cultivation. It is the way of self-mastery, self-determination, and self-acceptance.” Kairos paused and added, “To follow the Way, we must discuss symbiosis. Without it, metamorphosis is impossible, and none of your relationships will flourish.” “Symbiosis,” Chronos said, “was the word I used when we re-entered the forest. It felt alive, as if the forest were one large organism. Everything seemed interdependent.” “The importance of symbiosis is easy to recognize in a forest but less so for humans. In an ecosystem, symbiosis is the mutually beneficial relationship be- tween fauna and flora. For example, fungi provide nutrients for trees, while trees provide the same for fungi. In this way, symbiosis supports the growth and health of everything in the forest.” “Are you suggesting humanity itself is an ecosystem?” “Yes, but not in the same way. Before I explain, there is another important interaction in an ecosystem called commensalism.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 343 “I’ve never heard of that.” “Commensalism is when one species benefits from another without mutual benefit. An example is when a small water organism attaches itself to a fish.” Chronos pointed to an orchid growing on a tree trunk and asked if this was an example of commensalism. Kairos nodded. He still wasn’t sure if Kairos was speaking metaphorically about human symbiosis. What he did know was that he was looking forward to going to bed. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 344 Chronospicked up his bowl to sip the stew. After setting it down, he asked Kairos to elaborate on the symbiotic rela- tionships among humans. “Human metamorphosis,” Kairos explained, “cannot occur in isolation. Un- like a butterfly, humans cannot cocoon themselves and simply hope to emerge transformed and happy. No one is an island unto themselves. Everyone you en- counter is your teacher—from children to elders to strangers, including those who annoy you. Even the painful end of a relationship is part of this symbiotic journey toward metamorphosis.” “But isn’t that the problem?” Chronos interrupted. “People are unlikely to acknowledge . . .” “Acknowledge what?” “I’m searching for the right word. I suppose I mean that I don’t think people would accept the idea of a spiritual ecosystem, if that’s even the right term.” Kairos smiled, surprised to hear Chronos mention a spiritual ecosystem. Taking a sip of his stew, he asked Chronos why he thought people would resist the idea. “Is it because,” he asked, “you believe people think they are self- sufficient or superior?” “You said earlier that people are often unwilling to listen—with empathy— to anyone who doesn’t share their views or beliefs. I think you're right. There's an assumption that there’s nothing to learn from those we disagree with.” Kairos nodded. "Countless wars have been fought for this very reason.” “I would imagine there are other reasons too,” Chronos added. “Of course. For instance, animosity toward others often serves as a steadfast substitute for having positive goals in life.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   345 “I don’t follow. Are you saying that unhappy people are drawn to conflict because it gives their lives purpose? That it provides them with a reason to live . . . or as you would say, a will to live?” “I know this sounds radical, but yes, that’s exactly what I mean. It’s im- portant to note that this isn’t done consciously. Consider how animosity, or even hatred, can serve as a substitute for monotony or as a distraction when someone feels dissatisfied with life.” “Like you said before,” Chronos added, “when there is a void, it must be filled.” Kairos nodded as he swallowed his last morsel of food. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 346 Chronospicked up his spoon to continue eating. What Kairos said reminded him of a profound void he had felt in his life. At one point, he couldn’t handle it anymore and rashly decided to enlist in the army. Not long after, a war broke out. He was a proud soldier until he witnessed the carnage and quickly became disillusioned. Months later, he woke up one day feeling confused and uncertain about what he was fighting for. When the war ended, he realized that joining the army had made him feel alive compared to his civilian life, where he felt bored and underappreciated. Like fighting for any cause, being a soldier gave him purpose and a sense of belonging. It alleviated his loneliness by making him feel useful. Unbeknownst to him, however, his identity became defined by having an enemy to fight against. Seeing Chronos deep in thought, Kairos remained silent until he finished eating. Chronos wanted to express something to Kairos but couldn’t find the words. Instead, he picked up his bowl and sipped his remaining broth. When he finished, he wiped his mouth and thanked Kairos for making the stew. What Chronos was struggling to convey was how the war changed him. All the death and pain he witnessed dulled his passion, especially one bloody battle that gutted his soul. It was the day he couldn’t save his friend, standing helplessly in the distance as an enemy soldier cut his friend’s throat. For months afterward, he felt nothing. The horrors of war numbed his spirit. Many times, he wished he had died on the battlefield. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   347 When he returned home, he was troubled by another form of death: prem- ature death—people who died too early due to injustice, whether actual or phys- ical. Most of the death and suffering he saw was unfair, as he witnessed countless individuals who never had a chance for a good life. What Chronos could not articulate to Kairos was the hope he clung to— that all suffering would one day be redeemed. He believed grief cannot be en- dured if death is the end. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 348 Withoutknowing exactly what Chronos was thinking, Kairos asked if he wanted more stew. Stunned by his reflection, Chronos handed over his bowl without looking at Kairos. As he filled their bowls, Kairos shared his experiences of interacting with people outside his Tradition. He explained that he had noticed a spiritual barrier that seemed to prevent them from wanting to learn about the collective wis- dom. “What barrier?” Chronos asked. “It’s hard to say for sure. What I can say is how this barrier manifests. They seem impatient and unable to focus long enough to engage in any deep, mean- ingful conversation. They also appear preoccupied.” “With what?” Kairos looked back at Chronos with a smirk. “With what they value.” “Is that supposed to be an answer? What someone values could be anything. Although it’s also possible to value nothing.” "You’re right. There are many reasons to be preoccupied, and sometimes these distractions can provide a necessary reprieve from life's turmoil. It's the habitual busyness that is worrisome." “You mean when busyness is an escape from loneliness or unhappiness?” “Yes. I don’t need to tell you how difficult it can be to navigate life.” “Especially,” Chronos muttered, “when you’ve lost your way.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   349 Kairosreturned to the table with the bowls. While stirring his stew, Chronos asked Kairos to elaborate on his earlier point. “If you truly value nothing, as you mentioned, this feeling is worse than being alone. It is a frightening place to be because you believe there’s no path to follow. But if you don’t even realize you’re lost, you won’t ask for directions, and so you’ll never discover another way to navigate life.” This made Chronos reflect on their earlier discussion about a spiritual eco- system. He realized he had undervalued friendship in how he spent his time. Symbiosis reminded him of how much we need one another to lean on. He told Kairos that he felt most lost during his midlife crisis. “I know it is common to feel disenchanted at this stage," Kairos said. "What’s even more shocking is that disappointment can feel like having a beau- tiful euphoric experience only to realize it was just a dream.” “What do you mean?” Chronos asked. "If you've spent most of your life imagining how much happier your future self will be once certain things happen, but those things never do, then the hope that kept you going all those years can feel like waking from a beautiful dream, only to be saddened that it was just a dream." "I see." “At midlife, people finally see the difference between a successful life and a good life. With this realization, they understand why their life passed by so quickly. It’s why the future arrives sooner than expected. According to the col- lective wisdom, this makes humans ‘accomplished fugitives from themselves.’ Regardless of one’s achievements or perceived failures, reaching midlife often feels like falling into a spiritual vacuum.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 350 Chronoswas startled when someone began banging on the door. Kairos quickly stood up and told Chronos to stay put. He walked over to the window to see who was there and sighed with relief when he saw it was just a fallen branch hitting against the door. Once Chronos’ heart stopped pounding, he asked Kairos what other in- sights he could share from the collective wisdom. “There is one important group from the collective wisdom that has offered tremendous guidance. You’ve already heard me quote from one of them.” “The Stoic philosophers?” “That’s right. They caused people to rethink their lives in ways that no one had done before. One book that comes to mind is On the Shortness of Life by Seneca. I have it here. Would you like to see it?” “I’d love to.” Kairos got up and walked over to an enclosed bookshelf in the corner of the room. “Here you go,” he said, handing the book to Chronos. As Chronos flipped through the pages, Kairos continued eating. “This is astounding,” Chronos exclaimed, his eyebrows shooting up as he closed the book. “Read it out loud,” Kairos urged with his mouth full. Chronos opened the book again to find the page. “‘It is inevitable that life will not only be very short but also very miserable for those who acquire, through great toil, what they must keep through even greater toil. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   351 New preoccupations replace the old; hope excites more hope, and ambition breeds more ambition. People do not seek an end to their misery but merely change the reason for it. Nobody calculates the value of time. They squander it as if it costs nothing. Yet when death threatens these same individuals, they pray to their gods and are willing to spend everything they have to stay alive. So inconsistent are they in their feelings.’” Chronos closed the book in amazement. “When was this written?” he asked. “About 45 years after the death of Christ.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 352 Kairospicked up the book to read another passage. Chronos sat back in his chair to listen. “‘Midlife overtakes many while they are still mentally childish, leaving them unprepared. They stumble upon it without realizing it is approaching, much like travel- ers caught in conversation who suddenly realize they have arrived at their des- tination. So it is with the fast-moving journey of life. The preoccupied only become aware of it when it is over.’” “This is a painful realization,” Chronos said, taking a deep breath. “Indeed. Although it can be beneficial if you recognize how this spiritual vacuum relates to time. It is this blindness that prevents people from appreciat- ing what is essential for meaningful relationships.” “You mean metamorphosis?” “Yes.” “But isn’t metamorphosis just an end in itself?” Kairos looked up from his bowl, surprised, and set his spoon down. “I think I’m beginning to understand,” he said. “This ties back to human symbiosis.” “Yes. Go on.” “It just occurred to me that if humans need one another to grow emotion- ally, intellectually, and spiritually, this can only happen if we spend time with those in our inner circle, assuming they nourish and encourage us.” Chronos paused and added, “When I say this out loud, it seems so obvious.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   353 “And yet,” Kairos added, “most people are lonely.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 354 When Chronos first inquired about the Way, he did not anticipate that their conversation would circle back to relationships. Before returning to the forest of Brocéliande, Chronos believed he was self- sufficient, considering it a positive attribute. He didn't want to rely on anyone. Now, he recognized that what he had valued in life had left little room for his own growth. At one point, he believed his time was so valuable compared to others' that he couldn't drop everything to spend time with family and friends. He rarely invited friends over for a meal. Chronos’ sardonic side resurfaced, hindering his ability to reflect on Kairos’ words. “I don’t think my failed relationships or discontent stemmed from a lack of knowledge.” Kairos looked surprised. “I never suggested that relationships fail due to a lack of knowledge. A person can be highly educated—even a savant—yet still lack compassion and be a poor listener. This is something else that humans are not born with.” “Compassion?” Chronos asked. “It is not instinctive.” Chronos set his spoon back in his bowl. “I disagree. Humans are not born bad.” Kairos paused, knowing he needed to choose his words wisely. “I’m not saying children cannot show compassion unless it is taught. Some children seem to have empathy innately compared to others. However, my point still stands, even though humans do inherit personality traits.” “So, what are you saying then?” Chronos pressed. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   355 “I believe there is kindness in everyone,” Kairos explained, taking another mouthful and chewing slowly before continuing. “Unfortunately, life tends to deplete love as chaos accumulates.” Chronos was about to reply, but Kairos continued. “It’s not that humans are born, per se, but they are not born good either. Consider how a baby instinctively learns to crawl before walking. It simply needs time. The same cannot be said for moral rectitude, character develop- ment, or wisdom. None of these are instinctual, even if the potential is there.” The notion of character development made Chronos think. He had never considered human behavior in this way. “Becoming wise requires the guidance of loving parents, caring teachers, friends, and relatives. It takes a community to raise a child. And if a child is sur- rounded by compassionate people, they will likely grow up to be compassionate themselves. No one becomes virtuous or an effective communicator without effort and intention.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 356 Ashe fiddled with his wooden spoon, Chronos reflected once more on his parents and his own upbringing. What Kairos said reminded him of his grandparents. What type of parents had they been to his mother and father? He didn't understand because his grand- mother had seemed so wise and loving towards him. “Maybe,” he mused, “my parents repeated an unbroken pattern they inher- ited without realizing it.” “Humans are not instinctually good parents,” Kairos continued. “If history teaches us anything, it’s that humans—without guidance—tend to stray. The history of humanity is filled with conflict, oppression, injustice, and inequality. Since humans are not naturally good parents, it’s not surprising that many have a long history of shallow and unfulfilling relationships.” Chronos sighed and set down his spoon. “That’s a depressing thought,” he replied. “Why can’t it be the other way around? Why aren’t humans like other mammals?” “What do you mean?” Kairos asked. “How is it that humans don’t instinctively raise their young as other mam- mals do?” Chronos picked up his spoon and continued eating his stew. “Go on,” Kairos urged. “Finish your thought.” “I suppose I’m asking why humans aren’t born with a natural aptitude for being good parents.” “You already know the answer, Chronos. Let’s continue this discussion to- morrow, okay?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   357 Chronos felt disappointed. “What do you mean I already know the answer? Have we talked about this before?” “For now,” Kairos replied, “I want to explore how the collective is also meant to metamorphosize.” “But given what you said earlier,” Chronos clarified, “isn’t that impossible if individuals don’t metamorphosize first?” “That’s correct. And this brings us back to the subject of symbiosis. Con- sider how the body is made of many parts, all of which are meant to work to- gether in harmony. This symbiotic relationship is essential for the overall health of a human being.” “But the individual parts of the body don’t do this consciously; they’re un- aware of each other.” “Exactly. That’s my point.” Chronos scratched his head, feeling lost once again. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 358 “We’ve been discussing how individuals and the collective are meant to metamorphose,” Kairos said. “The collective has a function, but it cannot evolve if the individuals who make it up are not given the opportunity to live fulfilling lives.” “I’m not sure what you mean.” “I’m referring to the best way of governance.” Chronos looked up from his bowl, intrigued. “A healthy and stable community or government can only thrive when in- dividuals are at their best. This is achievable when all children receive the same education.” “But education means different things to different people. How does your Tradition define it?” “Holistically.” Chronos laughed and set his spoon down again. “Okay, now you’ve lost me.” “Think of making a Kouign Amann cake, for example.” “I haven’t had one of those in years! My grandmother used to make it all the time. I loved how it melted in my mouth.” “All recipes,” Kairos continued, “have various ingredients. When you mix them together in the right amounts and at the right time, you create a whole cake.” “When you said the word recipe, my first thought was: what goes into mak- ing a good human being?” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  359 Kairos chuckled. “I’ve never heard anyone phrase it quite like that! It’s an insightful question because you’re asking: what are the ingredients needed to live a good life, at least potentially? In my Tradition, there are four fundamental ingredients: having your basic needs met, a loving family, a holistic education, and a caring, safe community.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 360 Kairosstood up and asked Chronos if he wanted another bowl of stew. “Please!” Chronos replied, handing over his bowl. “I didn’t realize I was so hungry.” As Chronos watched him fill his bowl, he expressed concern about forget- ting everything they had discussed, just as he had when he was a boy. Kairos reassured him that it wasn’t possible to remember everything. “But if I could, I would stop making the same mistakes.” “This is why we need wisdom literature close to our hearts. It must be read and reread daily. This is how one becomes stronger, wiser, and more resilient.” “And probably less discouraged,” Chronos added. “Yes, and less discouraged.” Chronos recalled Kairos speaking about education before but was now cu- rious about how his tradition taught young people. “We first teach them the art of dialogue, including how to handle conflict peacefully. They learn about moral and intellectual virtues. We encourage char- acter formation. We train them to think logically, analytically, and critically. We offer them practical skills and useful knowledge so that they are equipped after leaving the tutelage of their parents.” “I assume they also learn math, science, music, geography, and other sub- jects I’m forgetting?” “Yes, they learn all of that. The goal is not to have the highest IQ. Knowledge is no guarantee of being a good parent.” “No argument there!” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 361 “It is our hope that after their formal education ends, they will continue to seek wisdom. We want them to leave school with a philosophical mindset and greater compassion. You can see now why we call this a holistic education.” “I was skeptical at first,” Chronos said, “when you spoke about conscien- tious parenting, but it makes sense now.” “Indeed. So many people have been scarred by their upbringing.” Chronos said nothing. He was still amazed that at his age, he still bore those scars. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   362 Kairoslooked up from his bowl and asked, “Do you see any other way, besides education, to improve people’s lives so that everyone can thrive?” “Not at the moment. But education won’t put food on the table, stop wars, or make people feel safe. I doubt a focus on education would be well received where I come from.” “To think otherwise,” Kairos replied solemnly, “is to underestimate the hu- man condition.” “Wait. I think I understand. This goes back to what you said earlier: no one is born wise.” “Yes. The human condition pivots on this very point. As I mentioned be- fore, the ultimate goal of education isn't just to earn a living; it’s about learning to live well within the collective.” “Are you suggesting that because of the human condition certain precondi- tions must be met to live in a healthy, safe, and vibrant community?” “That’s what collective wisdom suggests. To paraphrase Aristotle, a na- tion’s fate depends on how its youth are educated.” While pondering this, Chronos took another sip of his stew. It struck him that he had never heard a political leader speak about education. “This raises a fascinating question: What is the purpose of government?” Chronos laughed. “To collect taxes!” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 363 Theconversation sparked a memory for Chronos, recalling something he had once read but hadn’t fully appreciated at the time: “A nation will implode when leaders do not value the symbiotic nature of the collective.” “Do you remember who said that?” Kairos asked. “I don’t.” Kairos pulled out his notebook and jotted it down. “This quote ties into our discussion. A country can only progress when individuals evolve.” “But that assumes,” Chronos countered, “that humans value one another equally.” “True. This reflects a facet of the human condition that each new genera- tion must confront.” “I understand,” Chronos replied, feeling relieved. "But this is the problem you have been highlighting. We do not inherit the wisdom of our ancestors, which is why your tradition places such importance on education.” “Many voices from the collective wisdom have offered insights on how to address the darker aspects of the human condition. For instance, the Roman poet Ovid wrote in the Art of Love, ‘People who know themselves will ever follow in their love affairs the precepts of wisdom.’ Centuries later, Dutch hu- manist Erasmus added, ‘The only way to happiness is to know thyself.’” Chronos listened with interest. “Given the human condition,” Kairos continued, “Sages have long believed that anyone wishing to follow the Way—to lead a meaningful life—must first ask themselves one crucial question.” “Please, not another question!” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 364 Chronos quietly wished Kairos would stop asking questions. He then won- dered why this bothered him so much. He found it amusing that he was ques- tioning himself. Shaking his head, he returned to his meal. “Do you want to hear it?” Kairos asked, with a playful glint in his eye as he noticed Chronos eating more quickly. “I do.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   365 Thequestion to ask before embarking on the Way is this: What are my in- tentions?” “That’s a vague question, don’t you think?” Chronos said while sipping his stew. “And besides, it’s almost impossible to answer.” “No. Not impossible, just uncomfortable.” “I don’t follow. Intentions about what?” Kairos took a breath. “This may sound disjointed, so I’ll say it slowly: What motivates you to do what you do mostly with your time?” Chronos looked at Kairos with a vacant stare. “Can you reword that?” “I can, but it’s not so much the wording that’s the problem. As humans age, they don’t want to consider another way to go through life.” Chronos nodded in agreement. “People invest so much time chasing what they believe will make them happy that it becomes nearly impossible to entertain the idea that they’ve lived with an incomplete life, with an incomplete understanding of happiness.” “You spoke about the connection between intentions and happiness,” Chronos said, setting down his spoon to gaze blankly out the window. “What is it?” Kairos asked after a few minutes. “I think I just had an epiphany. I see now that I believed happiness was something that just happens.” The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   366 Astonished, Chronos looked over at Kairos, saying, “The happen- stance of happiness.” Kairos smiled. “That’s precisely the original meaning of happiness. Happen- stance refers to luck. However, for ancient Greek philosophers, happiness is not merely something that just happens. Olympians don’t win by luck.” “That’s true,” Chronos replied, gazing at the flickering candlelight. Kairos resumed eating, speaking between bites. “A life well lived is not a well-lived life because of luck. If happiness were just happenstance, it would merely be another fleeting emotion—one day happy, the next day depressed. But those who follow the Way are far less affected by life’s ups and downs. They access something called ataraxia.” “I’ve never heard that word before.” “It's another ancient Greek word similar to tranquility and equanimity. At- araxia is a state of being you can access at will. This means positive or negative circumstances don’t have to dictate your emotional state. Of course, this doesn’t mean you won’t be affected by calamity; it simply means it won’t cripple you for an extended period.” Chronos still didn’t fully grasp what ataraxia meant, so Kairos suggested they discuss it later. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~  367 Chronos was eager to learn more, but something else was weighing heavily on him. After finishing his meal, he told Kairos he was too tired to talk any longer; his mind felt saturated and unable to absorb more. Kairos handed Chronos a blanket and suggested he sleep on the cot along the east wall. “I’ll be over here,” he said. “If you need to get up in the middle of the night, don’t go outside. Just use that bucket over there.” “Why can’t I go out?” Chronos asked. “It isn’t safe,” Kairos replied sternly. “I won’t,” Chronos said, recalling his childhood when the elders in his vil- lage warned him: “The spirits of the Druids still roam the forest of Brocéliande.” The memory sent a chill down his spine. As Chronos lay down on the cot, he felt immediate relief resting his head on the soft pillow. Looking out of the small window, he marveled at the multitude of stars twinkling brighter than he had ever remembered. The vastness of space reminded him of everything he had learned today, filling him with both inspiration and overwhelm. His eyes grew heavy as he hoped to see a shooting star. It had been a lo ng time since he had lain quietly to enjoy the mysteries of the heavens. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~   368 Kairoscontinued to putter around, adding more wood to the stove and leaving the remnants of dinner for tomorrow. Once he finished, he picked up his flute and settled into his rocking chair to play a melody from his Tradition. As the notes floated through the room, Chronos felt like a boy again, listen- ing to his grandmother soothe him to sleep with her flute. He soon drifted off with a smile on his face. Noticing Chronos asleep, Kairos set down his flute and pulled out his pipe to carefully fill it with tobacco from a worn leather pouch. He struck a match to light it. As he took gentle puffs, he reflected on the day while rocking back and forth. He worried about Chronos' fate after leaving the forest of Brocéliande. He then wondered if he had shared too much in such a short time. But what troubled him more was the sense of something ominous looming, and that he still didn't know what had been tracking them. As Kairos stared into the fire, he took another puff, contemplating whether he had underestimated the power of Chronos’ negative voice. It seemed to de- moralize him more than he had anticipated, convincing Chronos that he was incapable of healing or forgiving others, including himself. After his pipe burned out, Kairos slowly rose from his rocking chair to add another piece of wood. He then made his way to bed and quickly fell asleep to the sound of Chronos snoring. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 369 Duringthe night, a glaring light woke Chronos. He had never seen the moon so close before. As he stood to head for the door and step outside to relieve himself, he felt disoriented. When he opened the door, a chilling gust of cold air shocked him. Slowly, he staggered to the side of the hut. As he peed, he gazed up at the moon in awe, but his wonder was interrupted by a noise behind him. Immediately, Chronos recalled Kairos's warning not to venture outside. He was about to turn and rush back in when he felt a cold, bony hand resting on his right shoulder. Panic surged through him. “You shouldn’t be here,” a voice whispered in his ear. “You will die.” Terrified, Chronos found himself too paralyzed to move or call out to Kairos. The voice whispered again, “Come with me.” His imagination led him to believe a Druid had come for him. This was the last thought Chronos had before he blacked out. TO BE CONTINUED . . . The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 370 If The Way of Metamorphosis resonated with you and would like to be part of its journey, you can help further its vision by donating here. (theWayofM.com/donate) To be notified of the release of Part II you may subscribe here. (theWayofM.com/subscribe_release_of_partII) Endnotes to select quotes will appear in the printed edition. To be updated on the paperback release click here. (theWayofM.com/subscribe_printed_edition_part1) The latest edition can only be downloaded here. (theWayofM.com) The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 371 The Way of Metamorphosis (Part I) is free to download. It is not to be sold or printed to be sold without the prior written consent of the author. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~ 372 This book is dedicated to mo anam cara, who has bestowed upon me the priceless gift of time and space to bring this project to fruition. Her unwavering love over the decades has nurtured my way of metamorphosis. The Way of Metamorphosis ~XVM ~